[blindkid] Leaving classes early

[Debby B]

Carrie, you are so right. We learn more each year, so we ought to have it all figured out by the time Winona gets finished with school! <grin> Lunch was tough this year as our school assigns seats in lunch. Where you sit the first day is where you stay. We did finally convince them that the 7th graders having lunch during 6th grade lunch were at a disadvantage, esp. our blind kids who were sent in early to beat the lines, so had no opportunity to find out who was in the room. They did move the kids so they are sitting with a group they were happier with.

We were unsuccessful getting teachers to call names, "there's no time" and they mostly didn't want to be bothered. Classes are more lecture style. Ugh, poor kids! No lockers at our school. There's a classroom set of books at each desk, and each student takes a copy home for the year. No excuses of "I didn't have my book at home," and no excuses of "couldn't get in my locker." 

We have to laugh, during the parent orientation evening, we're given the same 3 minutes to get to classes. Wow! To get from the 7th grade hallway, which is upstairs, to the specials (band in Winona's case) or to lunch is a race! Both of my kids have class, run to band, back to class, run to lunch, back to class. It'll be so nice when they hit 8th grade, and are downstairs, and a building closer to the specials and lunch!

Meanwhile, we keep plugging along. Winona learned tons about advocating for herself at Buddy Camp at BLIND, Inc. last summer. Y'know, all those things MOM suggests, but what does mom know? <grin> It is harder for the shy, quiet, slow-paced kids that's for sure.

 Debby 
bwbddl at yahoo.com
www.nfbflorida.org/parents


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----- Original Message ----
From: Carrie Gilmer <carrie.gilmer at gmail.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Kid Mailing List, (for parents of blind children)" <blindkid at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Saturday, January 24, 2009 1:38:28 PM
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Leaving classes early

Debby,
You mention one thing we did have in Jordan's IEP, gave teacher's reminders
of, and in middle school and early high school did put as a shared onus. It
is the identifying of classmates. On the other hand equal onus was on Jordan
and we strongly made it a goal and gradually turned it to his entire
responsibility which it has been for two years now. Meaning he still needs
people to identify themselves but he must make the reminders and requests
and figure out when it is appropriate and to his benefit to do so.

Early on I had some passion and disagreement from some (not all) NFB
professionals on our request to have some responsibility on school staff.
But I noticed in every meeting we would begin (NFB), people would introduce
themselves. I began to take note that in meetings of sighted people where
they did not all know each other the same thing was done. So we began to
teach Jordan to learn to use roll call to identify people he knew, to make a
conscious effort to learn voices and remember, and simultaneously in the
first weeks of classes for teachers to name students who were speaking when
called upon. So if Jenny had her hand raised, the teacher needed to say out
loud, "Yes jenny" or something like that. For some teachers this was a habit
they already did somewhat, for others it was very difficult. Some teachers
directed students to say their names when speaking just as whenever I go to
an NFB function people identify themselves when speaking up. This is
something when they get out in life they will have to remind peers and
co-workers to do. Again that takes confidence and social skill. It is
reasonable I believe. He did have trouble when no one identified and it was
a real discrepancy. He also had a real shyness about asking himself. I think
you will recall about my post some months ago about identifying in passing
and Jordan's continued reluctance to ask "who are you?".

This can be a big deal. It can be important to learn who that classmate is
to approach or to avoid. Oh that is Jerry who is always not knowing the
answer or saying something stupid. Oh that is Jenny who always knows the
answer, maybe I need to get her number as someone to call if I ever need
something from class or a study buddy. Oh that Fred, he is funny, I like
him, I think he was in my English class last year. Sighted kids can get and
sort this information from visual identification. It can be important later
in business or college or in the community--we all know how an impression or
contact can be lost or somewhat damaged when someone thinks you should know
them and you forgot their name or can't recall how you know them--people can
be sensitive to that. You could also lose an opportunity if you fail to
recognize people and what they may bring in networking.

As far as lunch-our kids have to learn to plan ahead. So if she (Winona-or
any of our kids) learns who someone is from identification in the classroom,
and finds someone whose personality she enjoys, she needs to learn that she
will often in life need to take the initiative. She can approach say Jenny,
and make-designate a meeting place at lunch. Sighted people designate
meeting places all the time! Or she will have to try and pay attention and
through the context of the conversation or through recognizing a voice as
she passes a table realize-oh those girls are in my math class, they seem
nice, and the maybe say hey can I join you or aren't you guys in Mrs.
Johnson's sixth hour math period-hey can I join you? We did some role
playing with Jordan on this. Also he learned to often just sit at a table
and ask anyone there-or meet new people as he sat down, often he found when
asking he did not know at first something in common. Say he sat down, and
then from asking and introducing he found the freshman was in band too or
sometimes a kid who rode the same bus or he had in Spanish last year or
something or their younger siblings knew each other! 

Middle school can be tough for all-everyone has more people they don't know
than they do know. I have sympathy for the shy. But I always told Jordan-he
was not a Hollywood star, people were not going to flock to him, or always
remember to identify themselves he had to ask, and if he wanted friends he
had to reach out and be one. 

It will get better Debby.



Carrie Gilmer, President
National Organization of Parents of Blind Children
A Division of the National Federation of the Blind
NFB National Center: 410-659-9314
Home Phone: 763-784-8590
carrie.gilmer at gmail.com
www.nfb.org/nopbc

-----Original Message-----
From: blindkid-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindkid-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Debby B
Sent: Saturday, January 24, 2009 9:55 AM
To: NFBnet Blind Kid Mailing List,(for parents of blind children)
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Leaving classes early

Sally, we battle this every year. Our middle school is huge, and classes are
basically in one hallway, other than lunch and "specials" such as band. The
week before school we practice the routes. They insist, even though it's not
in IEP, that Winona leave early so as not to be late, "since she's such a
slow mover." My theory is that if they'd EXPECT her to get there on time,
she'd speed up! She always misses some assignment.  When tthe teachers
complain to me, I've put it back on them. "You need to tell the O&M that
Winona is missing work." and I've put it on Winona. "You need to tell him
that you received a zero because you missed another assignment leaving
early." This year has been better, and we got them to back off within the
first weeks of school. It took teacher complaints, me in the office weekly,
and Winona's complaints to get to this point.

It definitely hurts that peer interaction having an adult hanging around.
We've seen a huge difference in middle from elementary. Winona hardly knows
a soul now, because no time is ever spent learning who is in each class, in
the lunchroom, etc. (They have 3 different lunch periods). Socially, middle
has been very tough on Winona.

Debby 
bwbddl at yahoo.com
www.nfbflorida.org/parents


Please support Braille literacy and programs for our youth by sponsoring me
in
the Motor City March for Independence! Better yet, join the team of the FL
Parents of Blind Children!
http://www.marchforindependence.org/goto/fpobc 
http://www.marchforindependence.org/goto/debbyb