[blindkid] Pressure on the school

Sun Mar 15 15:40:44 UTC 2009

Dear Holly,
Yesterday I wrote in a more general sense to address the "can't we all get a
long"...this is a major thing I witness over and over and as I said I myself
made major mistakes in trying to all get along and not identifying the real
problems--and that it turns pretty quickly to "going along" in reality. It
is alarming to me how long many of us stay in the trying to get along and
"discuss concerns" stage before moving on. 

Today you give new information that helps bring out another aspect and make
it more specific to you. The history you have with them. I have found that
in many cases there are two fundamental barriers to people who do have good
intentions and good will (which most educators do).
1. Belief (they don't "do" because they don't believe, they don't believe
because they are ignorant of blindness issues).
2. They trust their "expert" colleague (the Teacher of blind students). It
is very difficult, sometimes impossible, for other professionals to grasp or
imagine or admit just how "off" or just how wrong or HOW UNKNOWLEDGEABLE,
one of their colleagues is on that colleague's own area of expertise. 

You have some good indicators in that you have a history that shows that
this group, when they know what to do, will nearly bend over backwards to do
it and do it in full. This is good. If you can get them to believe and raise
their moral conscience about it-you have good material here that seems very
positive. (It could be worse there exits, not in rarity either, teams who
seem to not have a moral conscience and the amount of energy to raise it is
like a ton of dynamite)

Take care and really observe them on the issue of accepting you as a team
member. It is very easy for them (IEP teams in general) to APPEAR like they
have accepted you on a collegial level and a partner when they feel they
know what they are doing, and you are totally agreeable. Their acceptance
however is I often find in reality based on your agreeable-ness, NOT that
they value you on a collegial level. This throws us off when we realize it,
don't let it throw you. If this was a basic value that they had, it would
have been done.

Schools like to think they are pro-active. But this Braille law is 12 years
old. It is not in some hidden section. It is right in the law under basic
development of the IEP. There is no real excuse for not knowing the
potential for a blind/low vision student in their midst could occur, also
for the TVI not acting accordingly. You have caught them, they are having to
be reactive, they don't like it. This is natural human behavior. They are
trying to save face and excuse themselves.

There is no excuse for the delay either since you brought in up in August.
It seems they have dragged their feet possibly because #1 they don't get it,
and they feel no urgency, it does not register with them how important this
is for Hank and #2 their "expert" is not urgent or does not seem to think
this is important-they are only acquiescing to a degree-this pre-braille
once a week ridiculousness tells me they do not get it at all, they are just
holding out some olive branch or making some small thing to make it look
like they have good faith and will give it a try. They are not thinking at
all that this is a precursor to full blown full time Braille use they are
preparing him for. They just have no idea at all how this will truly benefit
Hank. That is what you have to get them to understand. I have given
"permission" to many teams for not knowing about blindness. I tell them how
I did not know, how most people do not, I talk about the low incidence. This
helps them save face. 

They are scrambling to get their "face" back. The comment that they never
had a student in twenty years use Braille, shows me they are trying to use
that to save face. You have created the crisis and tension that is needed to
get them moving on it. Keep up the pressure, and look for ways to help them
save face in the process without giving in to less than Hank deserves. This
is not easy to do, but it sounds like you have potential there if you can
get them to believe and buy in. If you can do anything to help them "look
like", in the end, it was their idea--not that you made them do it, that is
the best.

Carrie Gilmer, President
National Organization of Parents of Blind Children
A Division of the National Federation of the Blind
NFB National Center: 410-659-9314
Home Phone: 763-784-8590
carrie.gilmer at gmail.com
www.nfb.org/nopbc
-----Original Message-----
From: blindkid-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindkid-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of holly miller
Sent: Sunday, March 15, 2009 8:37 AM
To: NFBnet Blind Kid Mailing List,(for parents of blind children)
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Pressure on the school

Hi Eileen!
We are in Oceanport, eastern side of Monmouth County.
It's a teeny tiny district.  One elementary school, one middle
school.  Roughly 80 kids per grade.
For HS the kids go to a 4 town regional HS.

 I'm sure the problem is that they have virtually no experience with more
complex SNs of any type.
Back in the summer I had chatted with the principal.  She's worked for the
district in various roles for over 20 years.  She told me they never had a
student that used Braille in all that time.  They are well versed in
Autisim, ADHD, Auditory Processing issues.  They know what to do with that.
 Our older son has Aspergers and they have done a fabulous job meeting his
needs since day one.  His IEP meetings have always been all smiles & nods.
I never had to ask for anything, they offered the right things right up
front. This is part of what is so frustrating.  Because we are a small
district, I'm dealing with the same people for both kids.  One kid they are
getting it perfectly right, the other kid they are getting it so very very
wrong....  Also I guess it's lulled me into a false sense of security.  That
if I explain things to them the right way, they will do the right thing
because they are reasonable people (ok, stop laughing!!!)

Not an excuse, not by a long shot.  If I can find all this stuff on the
internet, so can they.  I've already spoon fed them quite a bit of info.
They know me from 9 years of our other son.  They know I take the time to
educate myself on the issues involved.  They know I'm not a PITA, hysterical
mom who makes pie in the sky demands.  I got *very* offended when the
caseworker said the other day "You can't know this isn't going to work" (re
45 min once a week)
Excuse me.  Just because you haven't bothered to educate yourself on the
subject, don't you dare assume I haven't.

Nothing more dangerous than a mad mom...

Holly

On Sun, Mar 15, 2009 at 4:39 AM, <EMMOL at aol.com> wrote:

>
> Holly,
> I was wondering... where in NJ you are located & which school district
you
> are in?
> Although I live in eastern PA and have had  great deal of  success with
our
> district (although not every year is easy or perfect), I work  in NJ and
> have
> had many dealing with the Commission, most of them frustrating.  Although
I
> am
> a speech pathologist, I am in a small school district in  NJ and wear many
> hats, one of which is that I coordinate the I&RS  Team. Having a blind son
> I have
> become the building "expert" on  blindness related issues, so I deal with
> the
> Commission for our Visually  Impaired Student. Carol has been a great
> resource for us over the years  regarding our son, who is now in high
> school, but if
> there is some way I might  be of assistance regarding your son in NJ,
> please
> let me know. It seems  like you are on the right path, but it does take a
> lot
> of time and energy  to fight the good fight!
> Eileen
>
>
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