[blindkid] Signs for Susan

Albert J Rizzi albert at myblindspot.org
Tue Feb 26 23:41:58 UTC 2013


Amen and testify Richard. Great post.

-----Original Message-----
From: blindkid [mailto:blindkid-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Richard
Holloway
Sent: Tuesday, February 26, 2013 6:05 PM
To: Blind Kid Mailing List, (for parents of blind children)
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Signs for Susan

Steve, I appreciate your question. I'm happy to discuss these matters. 

Purely from a driver's standpoint, I expect different reactions from
different situations in a driving environment. In that specific example,
certainly, if the kids were going to be playing, particularly in a location
where there were limited range of vision for a driver, either sign would be
appropriate and helpful. In that specific case, kids are indeed playing. If,
as a driver, you're in an alert status, looking for either "kids at play",
or a "blind child" you'll probably react safely, so in that case I suggest
either sign might be helpful.

Now, put a blind child near the street in a yard or on a sidewalk. I might
actually expect ANY two-year-old to dart in any direction virtually
randomly, so I would slow down, especially if I didn't see an adult holding
such a child's hand. But make the child a bit older. 5 or 6 perhaps. A kid
that age, I believe, would be less likely to jump out in traffic. By that
age, I more expect kids to be chasing balls without looking, but otherwise
reasonably attentive. Blind kids at that age, or at least my blind daughter
was probably MORE likely to bolt into the street than at a more docile age 2
or 3. By 6 or 7, she was much more driven to abrupt movement, yet not at all
clear about the concept of cars coming down the street.

Now as a 4th grader, my daughter is perhaps slightly less likely to do
something abrupt than at age 6, but still FAR more likely than her sighted
peers to walk arbitrarily into the street if she looses her bearings. This
sort of situation is NOT what "child at play" brings to mind.

When driving, if I see a 10 or 12-year-old walking in a straight line across
the street, I would not anticipate the child making a sharp turn or
reversal. Most sighted kids I know don't generally do that. My blind
10-year-old daughter certainly might. Again, from a car driver's
perspective, my daughter's behavior is not what is typical from a child her
age. A confused driver is, in my opinion, a good deal more likely do do
something dangerous in that sort of situation. I think knowing she's blind,
might keep her safer from that driver, if only slightly so.

Most important to me, again, as a driver, I often make eye contact or
exchange gestures with people on the road. I don't know how universal that
is. Maybe it is a regional thing. Down south, we wave to say "thanks" when a
driver lets us merge in front of them, and in fact failing to wave is often
taken as an insult. We wave people-- both kids and adults, across the street
all the time, or the pedestrian may wave off the driver. The exchange is a
very visual business. I slow down sometimes and wait for eye contact to feel
as sure as I can that I'm aware of a pedestrian's intention. Well if you
"make eye contact with my daughter" what you inferred isn't going to be very
accurate. I can just imagine the later discussion-- "I saw her, she looked
right AT me, then she walked right in front of my car!!! I had no idea she
couldn't see me! I'm so sorry!!!" I feel ill at just the notion. That's what
I want to avoid with such signs. "Child at Play" is no help there.

In my opinion, in my situation here, I think that if we were not on SUCH a
quiet street, I would have already requested signs to protect my daughter
and minimize potential driver frustration, however, our street is really
VERY quiet, and we watch our daughter very carefully.

With that said, she's old enough that at some point, I'm going to have to
give her a little more freedom near the road. If I decide she's not 100%
safe, I reserve the right to request such a sign. I don't want a lot of
flack if I do so.

As I think I mentioned before, I feel like a deaf child could easily react
differently as well. If the parents of a deaf child are worried the child
won't hear certain sounds and it puts them at increased risk, from a
driver's standpoint, I like to know that someone won't react to the warning
of a horn, for example. In that case, I'd prefer a "deaf child" sign. The
information is more specific; more useful to keep the child safe.

The differences are subtle, but important. I think this is a personal choice
for each parent, and it really concerns me that pressure of any kind is
being exerted by others to avoid somehow casting aspersions on the blind
population by requesting these signs.

With that said, I also think this is a personal choice for a blind adult as
well-- a choice the adult makes for himself, mind you. I think what happened
in Colorado was really inappropriate, because others were deciding this for
the blind travelers. That doesn't mean if some adults feel safer with these
signs in place that they should be prevented because it reflects poorly on
those who don't want the signs. If others disagree, but I feel it is pest to
err to the side of caution.

The social connection you mention is great. If added safety, no matter how
little it may be, from the sign helps some parents feel slightly more
comfortable letting kids have a little more freedom to play or otherwise go
about their business, that does indeed increase the chance for these very
important connections.

I will add one thing more as well. After giving this a lot of thought, I
think such signs do one thing more. After more than 10 years of observing
and watching reactions to the "what are you doing letting your blind child
go and do dangerous things like that" mentality-- crazy things like riding a
bike, jumping into a pool without a sighted helper holding onto her, playing
in and around trampolines, running across the yard, going to gymnastics
classes or yoga classes... maybe some of us like the idea of telling others
that our kids may be out there and we know it, and they have every right to
be there, yet we'd appreciate it if they'd be just a little bit extra
careful in case their behavior or reaction to a passing car is a little
different. I'm not inviting a great debate on this matter, and the last part
(this paragraph) is just a thought that recently occurred to me, but I think
maybe there is a touch of truth in that for some of us as well.

Thanks again for the discussion.

Sincerely,

Richard

On Feb 26, 2013, at 2:09 PM, Steve Jacobson wrote:

> Richard,
> 
> While you and I seem to disagree on this, I would truly like to 
> understand your position better.  Are you really saying that the 
> two-year-old sighted kids that are racing with her child are totally 
> responsible and in need of no protection?  If there is no separation 
> between the street and where these kids are playing, I do not see how 
> a blind child is going to be at a greater risk, there is some risk for 
> all of them and a warning that there are children at play is probably
appropriate.  Connecting her ability to get a sign with the child's
opportunity to play with other kids completely baffles me.  .  The solution
isn't in the sign, it is in making the social connections, and I, too, am
glad to see that Susan's child, certainly with her help, made those
connections, but I truly do not see that a sign is necessary to make that
possible.  Have I misunderstood your note?
> 
> Best regards,
> 
> Steve Jacobson
> 
> On Mon, 25 Feb 2013 23:09:07 -0500, Richard Holloway wrote:
> 
>> Susan,
> 
>> I don't see anything wrong with requesting such a sign for your child 
>> at that age, or at any age where you, the parent, feel it
> is appropriate.
> 
>> You did a good thing. More parents should find solutions to get their 
>> kids, be they sighted or blind, out and playing in
> situations like that!
> 
>> (How I wish they'd had jeeps like that when I was a kid!!!)
> 
>> Richard
> 
> 
> 
>> On Feb 25, 2013, at 8:39 PM, SUSAN POLANSKY wrote:
> 
>>> We moved on to a dead end court when our son was 2. We asked our 
>>> town for a sign at the entrance to the street. I feel it was
> totally appropriate to have a sign when our little one was out playing 
> with the other kids and basically drag racing the other little ones in 
> his toddler jeep. Would we not have asked for a sign if he had been 
> older. Each parent needs to look at their child and their neighborhood and
make their own decision. I think this subject has been beaten to death. No
more "to sign or not to sign"  emails for me, any more will be deleted
without opening.
>>> 
>>> 
>>> Susan T. Polansky
>>> 
>>> 
>>> ________________________________
>>> From: Bernadette Jacobs <bernienfb75 at gmail.com>
>>> To: "Blind Kid Mailing List, (for parents of blind children)" 
>>> <blindkid at nfbnet.org>
>>> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 8:11 PM
>>> Subject: Re: [blindkid] To Sign or not To Sign
>>> 
>>> I am a very strong opponent of blind, deaf, Autism, or any other 
>>> signage.  None of us needs to be put on that kind of display!  Only 
>>> thing this says to me is, "Walking Target!" Target!" Walking Target.
>>> When I had my hysterectomy at an inner city hospital here, when I 
>>> came out of surgery and into my room, my husband mentioned to me 
>>> that there was a sign on my door, "Blind Patient!"  If I wasn't sick 
>>> enough from just having had surgery, I sure was sickened then.  So, 
>>> my husband tore down the first sign.  Bright and early next morning 
>>> when he came in vack in to visit me, another signed had replaced the 
>>> first one.  He went out to find that nurse.  Before long, suddenly I 
>>> heard the nurse arguing with my husband.  I forced myself up out of 
>>> bed, grabbed my cane and began walking down the hall, holding onto 
>>> the rails for dear life and simply excused myself quietly and then 
>>> proceeded to waste no bones about how that woman oughtta do 
>>> something real quick.  After all, who was her bread and butta???  I 
>>> had insurance.  I didn't feel guilty in the least.  She turned on me 
>>> and I simply went back to my room; called my doctor at his home; and 
>>> Hmmm!  For some strange reason I never heard from or saw that woman 
>>> again and the sign soon disappeared.  Then when someone called weeks 
>>> after I had been released from the hospital to ask me about how I 
>>> felt about my hospital experience, I really laid it on thick that to 
>>> post blind signs, or any other Special Needs' sign, would only serve 
>>> to identify those individuals as vulnerable walking targets and no 
>>> matter what the intent, it was truly a bad idea.  After all, Seems I 
>>> actually remember Dr. Jernigan saying once, that "The road to Hell 
>>> is paved with good intentions."  I'm sure I need not say more.
>>> 
>>> Bernie
>>> 
>>> On 2/22/13, Carly B <barnesraiser at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>> Hi Merry-Noel,
>>>> 
>>>> I've thought about this, too. There are a couple of signs on 
>>>> streets near our own. We have not pursued trying to get a sign for 
>>>> our neighborhood. I haven't really thought that through, I think 
>>>> it's just a gut feeling that I don't want to put more of a spotlight on
my child than there already is.
>>>> Know what I mean? I'm not really sure the benefits of having a sign...
>>>> 
>>>> Thanks for bringing it up. I look forward to hearing what others think!
>>>> 
>>>> :) Carolynn
>>>> 
>>>> On Fri, Feb 22, 2013 at 7:40 PM, Merry-Noel Chamberlain
>>>> <owinm at yahoo.com>wrote:
>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>>   Hi,
>>>>> My daughter, Ashleah, is working on a girl scout project and would 
>>>>> like to know your thoughts about the "Special Needs" sign.  She is 
>>>>> blind and walks to and from school independently.  Do you think 
>>>>> having a Special Needs sign by our house is a good thing?  Why or 
>>>>> why not?
>>>>> Thanks.
>>>>> Merry-Noel
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