[BlindTlk] A question

Tue Mar 10 22:55:27 UTC 2020

This morning, when I went out to breakfast with a friend, I suddenly decided 
I wanted to put some ketchup on my scrambled eggs and homefries.  So, I 
looked along the wall for the bottle of ketchup and opened it and started 
trying to get it to come out on the food.  A little drop did, then, it 
stopped.  The waitor asked why I didn't tell him I wanted him to do it.  I 
looked at him, sort-of.  Then, he said:  "I know, you want to be 
independent".  I said, "No, I just wanna be me".  Personally, I never would 
have thought of asking.  But my friend, eating breakfast with me, started 
feeling like she had to explain to me that a lot of people in my building 
don't know how to do things for themselves.  I really didn't need to be told 
that, and I didn't think it mattered for me.  Unfortunately, this diner is 
down the street from a buildingful of blind people, so the public gets to 
see some of the worst behavior.  I actually ended up having a tug-of-war 
with a waitor, a long time ago, to get the milk pitcher and the spoon out of 
his hand, so I could fix my own coffee before he made a mess of it.  Most of 
them are getting to know enough to just bring me the coffee and the milk, 
the way they do everybody else who is not blind.  Pam.

-----Original Message----- 
From: PLipovsky via BlindTlk
Sent: Tuesday, March 10, 2020 6:27 PM
To: 'Blind Talk Mailing List'
Cc: PLipovsky
Subject: Re: [BlindTlk] A question

I agree unless it's really something noticeable.  It never ceases to amaze 
me how some visually impaired folks are not taught the proper manners or 
etiquette when growing up, such as eating with a knife and fork, not with 
your hands, chewing your food with your mouth open, etc.  parents that do 
this don't realize they are doing that child an injustice.

When I was young, my Mom cut up my food for me until one day I told her I 
wanted to do it myself, and guess what, it wasn't that hard to do.  I know 
some that have a restaurant cut up their food for them all the time before 
it's brought out to the table.  I understand if a person simply prefers not 
to do that themselves, , but I don't think it present a good image of blind 
folks to the general public to do that.  Of course, I'm pretty independent 
and have always been that way, and do realize independence is different for 
everyone.

be
-----Original Message-----
From: BlindTlk <blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Kevin via BlindTlk
Sent: Tuesday, March 10, 2020 3:36 PM
To: blindtlk at nfbnet.org
Cc: Kevin <kevinsisco61784 at gmail.com>
Subject: Re: [BlindTlk] A question

It isn't easy.  If you don't know the person I would say it's best not to 
say anything.

On 3/10/2020 3:10 PM, Sherri via BlindTlk wrote:
> I appreciate this conversation.  For those who have children, you know 
> they
> are quick and not always so tactful about pointing out things.  This
> particular instance refers to the table manners of a friend who was
> visiting.  It's a very sticky subject!  I would want to be told if my
> manners offended someone so I could try to change them.  I also appreciate
> being told if I have a shirt on that is stained, dirty or see-through.  I
> would much rather know than have people talk about it behind my back.  My
> mom was a stickler for good manners, good hygiene, etc. and I am glad she
> was.  My question is how do you tell someone without offending them?  Pat,
> thanks for bringing this matter to our attention.
>
> Sherri
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlindTlk [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of PLipovsky
> via BlindTlk
> Sent: Tuesday, March 10, 2020 2:06 PM
> To: 'Blind Talk Mailing List' <blindtlk at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: PLipovsky <plipovsky at cfl.rr.com>
> Subject: Re: [BlindTlk] A question
>
> What I'm thinking is most people who don't know you probably won't say
> anything.  If they know you, depending on how well you know each other 
> would
> probably determine whether or not they said anything.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlindTlk <blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Kevin via 
> BlindTlk
> Sent: Tuesday, March 10, 2020 1:36 PM
> To: blindtlk at nfbnet.org
> Cc: Kevin <kevinsisco61784 at gmail.com>
> Subject: Re: [BlindTlk] A question
>
> It does depend on the social skills of the person telling you.
>
>
> On 3/10/2020 12:41 PM, Pamela Dominguez via BlindTlk wrote:
>> It would depend on how they told me.  In most cases, I probably would
>> thank them, and be glad they told me.  I was wearing a shirt that was
>> able to be seen through.  A person told me, and I felt embarrassed
>> because I didn't know, but I was grateful, and thanked her.  Now, if
>> the person was snarky about it, depending on how, that might make a
>> difference in how I responded. Pam.
>>
>> -----Original Message----- From: PLipovsky via BlindTlk
>> Sent: Monday, March 09, 2020 8:49 PM
>> To: 'Blind Talk Mailing List'
>> Cc: PLipovsky
>> Subject: [BlindTlk] A question
>>
>> Hi all.
>>
>> I had a discussion about this with someone the other day, and thought
>> I would throw it out to you to get your input..
>>
>> If a friend, or someone you know with vision told you there was a
>> stain on your shirt, or your pants were dirty or wrinkled, would  you
>> get offended?
>>
>>
>> Since I always try to look my best, especially when out in public, I
>> personally would welcome that, in fact, I've told people if they see
>> something not quite right to always let me know, as I would rather
>> know so I can fix it rather than go around looking sloppy.
>>
>> Any opinions?
>>
>>
>>
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>>
>>
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