[blparent] Santa's Letter....

[Jo Elizabeth Pinto]

That's cute.

Jo Elizabeth

It is easy--terribly easy--to shake a man's faith in himself. To take 
advantage of that to break a man's spirit is devil's work. Take care of what 
you are doing. Take care.--George Bernard Shaw in "Candide"
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "by way of David Andrews <dandrews at visi.com>" 
<tweetybaby19 at comcast.net>
To: <david.andrews at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Sunday, December 21, 2008 6:15 PM
Subject: [blparent] Santa's Letter....


>
>
> Dear Santa,
> I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled my children 
> on demand, visited the doctor's office more than my own doctor, sold 
> sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the 
> school playground. I was hoping you could spread my list out -- over 
> several Christmases.
>
>
>  Since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of 
> a receipt in the laundry room between cycles; and who knows when I'll find 
> any more free time in the next 18 years, so now - -
>
> *** Here are my Christmas wishes ***
>
> * I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache (-in any color, except purple, 
> which I already have) and arms that don't hurt or flap in the breeze; but 
> are strong enough to pull my screaming child out of the candy aisle in the 
> grocery store.
>
> * I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month 
> of my last pregnancy.
>
> * If you're hauling big-ticket items this year, I'd like fingerprint 
> resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music; a television 
> that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals; and a 
> refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide 
> to talk on the phone.
>
> * On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, 'Yes, 
> Mommy' to boost my parental confidence, along with two kids who don't 
> fight and three pairs of j eans that will zip all the way up without the 
> use of power tools.
>
> * I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting, 'Don't eat in 
> the living room' and 'Take your hands off your brother,' because my voice 
> seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard 
> by the dog.
>
> * If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough 
> time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury 
> of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a 
> Styrofoam container.
>
> *If you don't mind, I could also use a few miracles to brighten the 
> holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a 
> vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely.
>
>
> *It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the 
> house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized 
> crime family.
>
> Well, the buzzer on the dryer is ringing, and my son saw my feet under the 
> laundry room door. I think he wants his red crayon back. Have a safe trip 
> Santa, and remember to leave your wet boots by the door, and come in and 
> dry off, so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table, 
> but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.
> Yours always with love and appreciation,
> A Mom
> P.S. One more thing . .. You can cancel all my requests, if you can keep 
> my children 'young' enough to believe in Santa.
>
>
> . . . Santa has asked that this gets passed on to all 'moms' if you wish
>