[blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions (braille menus)

Mon Jun 8 19:33:33 UTC 2009

Well, I didn't complain about the rude behavior or the menu that came in
pieces, but I did hand it back to her and told her she might try finding the
binder and if they wanted I would try to put it back together. She sort of
laughed, but it never returned. V

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Jo Elizabeth Pinto
Sent: Sunday, June 07, 2009 10:27 PM
To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions
(braille menus)

Why is it that if
 restaurants have braille menus--a lot of the chains do, but sometimes the 
wait staff don't know the braille menus exist, or even what braille 
is--they're usually way out of date, and often they don't list the prices. 
The restaurants wouldn't make much money if their print menus were out of 
date, missing the prices, or came in pieces with no binding.

As far as people speaking to my companions, I usually just say, "Hmmm, I 
think *she* will have coffee, please."  I've even been known to turn to my 
baby or my guide dog and say, "Hmmm, sweetie, what do you think she'll have 
today?"  Once I turned to the person sitting to my left at the table, and I 
said, "Hey, Al, what's she going to have?"  Al turned to the person on his 
left and said, "I don't know.  Deb, what will she have?"  And so it went, 
all the way around the table, till it got back to me.  Then I said, "I 
believe she'll have a Belgian waffle."  If I can make the waiter or waitress

laugh a little, I usually get friendly service after that.  If I get really 
great service, I make it a point to tell a manager or fill out a comment 
card or leave a note, so that it is brought to people's attention in a 
positive way what people with disabilities expect.  It seems better than 
just complaining when service is substandard.

Jo Elizabeth

"Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed 
until it is faced."--James Baldwin
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Veronica Smith" <madison_tewe at spinn.net>
To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Sunday, June 07, 2009 9:41 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions

> Like the other night, my sighted husband  and I were at Red Lobster and 
> the
> waitress asked if "she" wanted a Braille menu.  So my husband told her she
> would have to ask me.  She did and then brought me one that was in pieces.
> The binding was missing.  V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Jennifer Massey
> Sent: Saturday, June 06, 2009 9:14 PM
> To: blparent at nfbnet.org
> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions
>
> that is true, My soon to be husband is blind and I have 2 small children.
> We were on our way to Kings Dominion last year with my 3 year old son.  We
> stopped in Quantico to get something to eat we were getting hungry and the
> man who waited on us was very rude.  He would ask me all of the questions
> and I finally had enough of it.  First, I politly asked him if you have a
> question for my partner please ask him directly.  Of course the next time 
> he
>
> came over to ask something he ignored Dustin and I asked to speak to the
> manager.  When the manager came out Dust told him what the man had done 
> and
> we ended up with a free dinner that night.
>
> Jennifer and Dustin
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Leanne Merren" <leemer02 at gmail.com>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Saturday, June 06, 2009 9:12 PM
> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions
>
>
>> But that is why we can't sit back and let them ignore us.  My mom has
>> gotten in the habbit of telling people to talk to me, not her.  She tells
>> them that I'm the parent.  My mother-in-law does too.  We deserve the 
>> same
>
>> respect and recognition as parents.  We just have to earn it, instead of
>> it coming naturally like it does for so many other parents.  Blind 
>> parents
>
>> aren't the only parents in this position, I'm sure.
>> Leanne
>> "Faith is being sure of what we hope for
>> and certain of what we do not see."
>> Hebrews 11:1
>> ----- Original Message ----- 
>> From: "Eileen Levin" <eileenlevin at comcast.net>
>> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Saturday, June 06, 2009 4:14 PM
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions
>>
>>
>>> Like JoElizabeth  my sighted husband was there and we received no visit
>>> from
>>> a social worker at all. I hadn't taken any classes, asked to leave the
>>> day
>>> after my son was born, and the staff all seemed to be directing their
>>> lessons to my extremely anxious sighted husband. The staff's tendancy to
>>> ignore me while teaching my husband never meant anything to me since I
>>> already knew how to change a diaper and bathe a baby from helping my
>>> mother
>>> with my two younger sisters. I think there was a note posted on my door
>>> from
>>> the staff about my blindness which my husband questioned as soon as he
>>> saw
>>> it.
>>>
>>> So, is there discrimination? From all this anecdotal evidence it appears
>>> the
>>> answer is YES YES and YES.
>>> Eileen
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] 
>>> On
>>> Behalf Of Jo Elizabeth Pinto
>>> Sent: Saturday, June 06, 2009 12:56 PM
>>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions
>>>
>>> I was lucky enough not to get much interference from social workers when
>>> Sarah was born.  I don't know if it was because her sighted father was
>>> there
>>>
>>> most of the time or what.  There was a doctor who asked if I would have
>>> help
>>>
>>> at home.  I said yes, and he didn't ask any more questions. 
>>> (Personally,
>
>>> I
>>> think whether there will be help is a valid question for any new mom,
>>> sighted or blind, especially now that I've been through the newborn 
>>> phase
>>> myself.)  Nobody asked me if I had everything ready for the baby, which 
>>> I
>>> did, and the nurses spent a lot of time trying to help me get nursing
>>> established, with no comment about my blindness.  The only social worker
>>> I
>>> saw asked me about financial issues, but Gerald and I made too much to
>>> qualify for the hospital's sliding scale.  It was nice to have such a
>>> positive experience at the hospital.  I think part of the reason
>>> everything
>>> went so well is that I took not only the childbirth classes, but also 
>>> the
>>> baby care and breastfeeding courses, and I had a tour of the maternity
>>> ward
>>> and asked a lot of questions, so by the time I delivered my baby, I was
>>> kind
>>>
>>> of a familiar face to many of the staff, and they knew I was taking my
>>> new
>>> role as a mother seriously.
>>>
>>> Jo Elizabeth
>>>
>>> "Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed
>>> until it is faced."--James Baldwin
>>> ----- Original Message ----- 
>>> From: "Melissa Ann Riccobono" <melissa at riccobono.us>
>>> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>> Sent: Saturday, June 06, 2009 6:47 AM
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] "General public" and their impressions
>>>
>>>
>>>> It's interesting about hospital social workers.  I actually was lucky
>>>> enough
>>>> to have a good experience with the social worker who visited me after
>>>> Austin
>>>> was born.  She seemed to stick to standard questions.  She did ask if I
>>>> had
>>>> everything ready for the baby; actually she didn't quite put it that
>>>> way.
>>>> She asked if we had a crib or a bassinette, a car seat, etc.  I could
>>>> hear
>>>> that she was taking notes and checking things off a list.  The hospital
>>>> where Austin was born often deals with high risk and very poor moms and
>>>> dads, so I felt a lot of the questions were based on the fact that so
>>>> many
>>>> people who pass through really do need a lot more help and services.  I
>>>> was
>>>> also offered WIC.  I don't know if this was standard or not, but I just
>>>> said
>>>> I knew we made too much to qualify and I was left alone.  The person 
>>>> who
>>>> made me the most nervous was a doctor--not the one who delivered
>>>> Austin--who
>>>> kept asking if I had help at home, and if I thought I could manage
>>>> because
>>>> of my "handicap."  Luckily, even though I was still in labor and not in
>>>> the
>>>> best mood, I managed to answer him calmly and firmly and nothing else
>>>> was
>>>> said.  Then there was this extremely annoying nurse who was completely
>>>> thrilled because I could find the toilet paper in the bathroom and I
>>>> "navigated so well!"  She questioned my ability to nurse because it's 
>>>> "a
>>>> very visual thing to know when the baby's mouth is open so you can 
>>>> stick
>>>> the
>>>> nipple in.  Are you really committed to nursing?"  Thank goodness I 
>>>> knew
>>>> my
>>>> sister, who is also blind, nursed three babies successfully, and that I
>>>> was
>>>> committed to nursing unless there really was a reason I couldn't--such
>>>> as
>>>> my
>>>> body not making enough milk, or Austin really having difficulties of
>>>> some
>>>> other kind.  So, I was firm on that point as well.  It is amazing 
>>>> though
>>>> simply how uneducated the public is!  I love the people who ask me if I
>>>> had
>>>> someone come in to "adapt" my house for the baby.  Yes, there are child
>>>> proofing companies and they are great if you want to use them, but I
>>>> think
>>>> it's crazy for people to believe that just because we're blind we don't
>>>> know
>>>> what is dangerous for a baby or small child.
>>>> Melissa
>>>>
>>>
>>>
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>>
>>
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