[blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit

[Veronica Smith]

I've lived that world.  In our case, others would chase Gab and she'd run
from them. But when I was the only one at home, she'd run, but since I
didn't chase she'd come to me after a little while.  I'd say such things as,
ok, you know mommy won't chase you so you can save the running for daddy.
As for the comments, tell her daddy not to say those things, just in case it
sticks with her. V

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Jo Elizabeth Pinto
Sent: Thursday, November 19, 2009 1:57 PM
To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
Subject: [blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit

I've been coming up against a situation that is troubling me a little, and
I'm looking for some feedback.  I guess I need to know whether I'm
overreacting, and there's nothing to be worried about, or if there is
something to be concerned about and what I ought to do.

Sarah is almost 21 months old now, and I stay at home with her.  She holds
my hand when we leave the house, and I've also got one of those animal
backpack harnesses for her.  But around the house, she's taken to running
away from me when it's time for me to change her diaper or put her to bed
and she isn't interested in doing those things.  I know that's normal
toddler behavior, so I don't take it personally.  But I also know there's no
way I can chase her and catch up with her, so I don't want to set that up as
a pattern.  I just stay in one place and call her, keeping the mood light,
and she usually comes to me soon enough.  No big deal.

The problem is, her dad and some sighted friends have chased her and scooped
her up, and a couple of times I've heard them say stuff like, "Well, I can
see, so I don't have to wait for you to come to me," or "It's hard to get
away from someone who can see you, isn't it?"

My worry is, will this start establishing the idea in Sarah's mind that Mom
can't see, so she can't keep up, or she can't do what needs doing?  I don't
think anybody has meant to be harmful or thoughtless, but wouldn't it be
better to have everybody following the no chasing rule?  If so, is there a
practical, realistic way to break the chasing habit in other caregivers, or
at least stop the comments?

Thanks for thinking about this with me.


Jo Elizabeth

Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify
the hunters.--African Proverb
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