[blparent] sad time

[Melissa Ann Riccobono]

Hello Veronica,
You could also encourage her to write a letter or letters to grandma, both
to say goodbye, and also to let herknow what she's doing now.  Memory boxes
can be helpful as well, or a memory scrapbook.  Just putting together
pictures, momentos, etc. that remind her of grandma.  There may be grief
groups through a local hospital or counseling center as well as the group at
school.  I worked with kids a lot when I was a school counselor who were
having very similar issues.  Being patient, letting her know it's OK to feel
all of the things she's feeling, talking to her, being supportive, and
sharing your own memories and feelings about grandma are all very good
things.  It sounds as if you're doing a lot of these things now.  I hope
this helps.  I'm sure it will take time, and I can't imagine how difficult
it must be to see your daughter hurting so much!
Melissa

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Veronica Smith
Sent: Thursday, November 19, 2009 4:56 PM
To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [blparent] sad time

One of the big problems here is that Gab was not allowed to go to the
hospital.  She feels that she did not get to say good bye.  My mother had a
really bad disease and no one could come in except us kids who could wear
the long rubber gowns and gloves.  Little children were not allowed.  Maybe
I could ask her to talk to grandma and tell her what she is doing at school
and everything.  Good idea. V

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Eileen Levin
Sent: Wednesday, November 18, 2009 7:49 PM
To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [blparent] sad time

Maybe this sounds crazy. When I lost my pet dog suddenly I spent some time
by myself just talking to his memory.  It helped to relieve the anxiety and
guilt I had because he was hit by a car and injured too severely to save.

When my grandmother died she waited til I came to see her. She died holding
my hand. I had time to tell her how much I loved her.  Those last moments
together made it a little easier.
Loosing a loved one is hard no matter how it happens. 
Hugs,
Eileen


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