[blparent] Question about parenting with blind children

[Jo Elizabeth Pinto]

Interesting subject.  I've been blind since birth, and I think the fact that 
I couldn't see limited what I knew about all the zillions of things that are 
available in stores.  When I was a teenager, some friends figured out that I 
thought there were only a dozen or so kinds of candy bars, so they took me 
to a supermarket and spent almost an hour reading candy packages, just so I 
would have an idea of what all was out there.  Another day, a friend of mine 
took me on a drive.  Her mom drove, and she spent the whole time reading 
signs.  I never knew there were so many signs, and she said she couldn't 
even read them all, with her mom at the wheel, because she didn't have time 
to see every one of them before we were past.

I don't recall getting told not to touch the ornaments on the Christmas 
tree.  I was taught how to be careful with fragile things, and even at 
three, I've worked with Sarah a lot on that.  My reasoning is that she's 
going to explore breakable things whether I try to keep her away from them 
or not, so I'd rather teach her to be careful and hope for the best than 
just pray she doesn't get into trouble.  I know kids shouldn't get to touch 
every little thing, especially in a store or at someone else's house, but I 
hear them getting told not to touch often when I think it's just 
inconvenient for the parents to take a moment and help them explore.  We put 
a lot of unbreakable ornaments on the three this year, both because of Sarah 
and because of the young cat we have, and we haven't discouraged Sarah from 
touching.  She's a great guard for the tree, chasing the cat out when he 
tries to crawl up inside the branches.

I do notice that Sarah seems to use her other senses more than other kids. 
I've taught her to notice sounds around her, such as airplanes or birds or 
sirens.  I've encouraged her to touch things instead of just looking, so 
that she'll comment on how soft a leaf is or how a pine cone is prickly.  I 
want her to be aware of smells, which add so much to perception.  It was 
interesting when we were grocery shopping a couple of weeks ago, and Sarah 
asked for the "soft kind" of yogurt.  I had no idea what she was talking 
about, but when her dad let her point out what she wanted, she showed him 
the whipped type of yogurt, which is airy and fluffy.  It surprised me that 
she applied the word "soft" to something she saw, but when I took a bite 
later, the yogurt felt soft in my mouth.

Jo Elizabeth

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, 
compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of 
the weak and the strong.  Because someday in life you will have been all of 
these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Bridgit Pollpeter" <bpollpeter at hotmail.com>
Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2011 11:55 AM
To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: [blparent] Question about parenting with blind children

> Hello,
>
> It's been a while, but have been so busy. Hope everyone is having a
> wonderful holiday season.
>
> So, while decorating the Christmas tree this year with Pen, everyone
> kept saying, "Don't touch, just look with your eyes." This seems like
> reasonable, sound advice, but then it hit me, a blind child can't look
> with their eyes. I've only been blind as an adult so it never crossed my
> mind that small things like this would be different with a blind child.
>
> Since this epiphany struck (ha-ha) I've been aware of how often children
> are told to not touch, just look. It happened frequently this season
> with Pen again as we were shopping with my mom and sister. I know this
> list is geared towards blind parents, nonetheless, I know many of you
> were blind children, and I'm sure most of you have answers.
>
> How do you allow a child who can't see to experience something like
> decorating a tree in a tactile way, but at the same time, steer them to
> an understanding that this isn't a toy to be touched and played with all
> the time? I'm especially curious about young children who are blind.
>
> Then, as usual, my thoughts went further to include that I think we can
> stifle healthy curiosity in any child, blind or sighted, but limiting
> what sense they use to experience life. I'm not suggesting we let kids
> touch every little thing, but is it really that bad to allow a child to
> "touch" say something like Christmas decorations even if they can see
> them? Rhetorical question, but have any of you incorporated nonvisual
> parenting into a, for lack of a better expression, more traditional
> parenting style, A. K. A. sighted parenting. *I'm simply using these
> terms to distinguish between things.
>
> Anyway, perhaps I'm not being clear, but I'm just curious about this,
> and it may be something I can use for my Live Well blog. I'd appreciate
> any responses.
>
> Sincerely,
> Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter
> Read my blog at:
> http://blogs.livewellnebraska.com/author/bpollpeter/
>
> "History is not what happened; history is what was written down."
> The Expected One- Kathleen McGowan
>
>
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