[blparent] Question about parenting with blind children

[Bridgit Pollpeter]

Debbie,

Thanks. I think sighted children with blind parents often end up with a
better "sense" of the world because their usually not limited by vision
alone. That's so sweet that your friend sent Janna a gift so she had her
own "pretty" to touch and look at. This is all very interesting and
helpful.

Sincerely,
Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter
Read my blog at:
http://blogs.livewellnebraska.com/author/bpollpeter/
 
"History is not what happened; history is what was written down."
The Expected One- Kathleen McGowan

Message: 10
Date: Thu, 29 Dec 2011 16:49:21 -0600
From: "Deborah Kent Stein" <dkent5817 at att.net>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Question about parenting with blind children
Message-ID: <007301ccc67c$1bc82e50$d70aa8c0 at Debbie>
Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="iso-8859-1";
	reply-type=original



Dear Bridgit,

 Growing up as a blind child, I was blessed with parents who intuitively

grasped that it was essential for me to learn and experience through
touch. 
They made a point of showing me things at home and out in the community.

When I was three or four my mother found time to take me for a walk
almost 
every day, and she showed me things all along the way - mailboxes, fire 
hydrants, hedges, fences, anything and everything that occurred to her. 
That spirit reached our whole extended family. Four grandparents and a
host 
of aunts and uncles followed my parents' example and showed me things in

their homes whenever we visited.  I was taught to touch carefully, 
especially when exploring an object that might be fragile or sharp, but
I 
was rarely told "Don't touch" within my family.  Of course I learned all
too 
soon that the rest of the world had a very different attitude, and I
suppose 
it's something of a lifelong mission to me to try to make inroads where
I 
can for the sake of all of us.

As the blind parent of a sighted child, I don't recall ever saying those

dreaded words, "Look with your eyes, don't touch!"  I decided when my 
daughter was a toddler that if I didn't want her to touch something then
it 
should be put away safely until she was older and could be trusted to
touch 
it gently.  We decorated the tree with things that were durable, such as

plastic or wooden ornaments that she could touch and play with.  By the
time 
she was three or four she had learned that some things are fragile and
can 
be touched carefully but not played with.

Your question brings a story to mind.  Once, when Janna was about four,
we 
visited a family friend whose house was filled with china figurines.
Janna 
longed to touch them. She kept asking to touch "Marion's fragile
things," 
but Marion told her no.  She didn't let anyone touch them, not even her
own 
husband!  Janna was quite heartbroken and we tried to explain that some 
people have different rules in their homes; every family gets to decide
what 
is okay and what is not.  A few weeks later Marion sent Janna a present,
a 
lovely Christmas tree ornament, a glass horse with wings.  We have it to

this day, and hang it on the tree every year.  Between Christmases it
waits 
in its own special box, labeled "Janna's Fragile Horse."

Debbie