[blparent] family and adoption

[Deborah Kent Stein]

 Sometimes when I read these posts I am speechless with outrage at the 
things we as blind people are subjected to.  Meanwhile sighted folks are out 
there feeling sorry for us because we can't see the sunset.  (How many of 
them ever go out of their way to look at it anyhow?)  On the positive side, 
we have the opportunity to develop inner strength and to form and cherish 
relationships with those people in our lives, however rare and precious, who 
truly get it about blindness and value us as we are.

Debbie



---- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at msn.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 2:21 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] family and adoption


> How awful and unprofessional that doctor and pediatrician were!  This is 
> still America, for God's sake!
>
> I have had pretty much nothing to do with my parents and siblings since I 
> was pregnant with Sarah, and till they change their attitudes, which isn't 
> likely to happen, I will continue to have little to no contact with them. 
> It's terribly sad that Sarah barely knows her grandparents and uncles and 
> aunts and cousins, most of them living less than half a mile away from us, 
> but it's at least as much their loss as it is ours.  I found the 
> professionals at the hospital and the pediatricians since then very 
> helpful and supportive of me as a mom, blind or not.  But doubts hurt the 
> worst when they come from those who are closest to us.  My family had 
> always been the kind who said I could do anything I put my mind to, but I 
> guess they drew the line at raising a child.  I hear through the grapevine 
> sometimes that they snipe and whine now and then about Sarah not being on 
> a schedule--she is on one, but she tends to stay up later at night than 
> some kids her age and get up later in the morning--or that she's not potty 
> trained yet at three and a half, or that she took too long to lose the 
> bottle and pacifier, or that she didn't eat enough or ate the wrong things 
> at some family function like a funeral or a birthday party that we all 
> needed to go to. But proof positive for me that I can successfully raise a 
> child is that Sarah is three and a half, insanely healthy, bright, social, 
> , and talkative, with no major accidents or disasters in her past.  Not to 
> say that a trip to the emergency room or a serious mishap necessarily 
> makes a bad parent, but my dad and brother and sister told me horror 
> stories of the probable choking, drowning, abducting, falling, running 
> over with a car, etc, etc, that would likely happen to Sarah if she stayed 
> with me, and none of those things have come to pass, thank God.  My sister 
> said she knew blind parents had raised children before, but that I needed 
> to think really hard and decide if staying with me would be the absolute 
> best option for my child, because the priority had to be on the needs of 
> the child and not on my feelings.  At this point, if I were speaking to 
> her, I could honestly tell her that yes, after much thought and years of 
> building a relationship, I do believe that being with me is the absolute 
> best thing for Sarah, and for me too.
>
> Jo Elizabeth
>
> "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself--nameless, unreasoning, 
> unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into 
> advance."--Franklin D. Roosevelt
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "jan wright" <jan.wrightfamily5 at gmail.com>
> Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 12:34 PM
> To: "blparent" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: [blparent] family and adoption
>
>> While my family questioned my capabilities, they eventually had to
>> leave me alone because i was determined and had asked them to leave if
>> they could not say anything nice.
>> But, i had a doctor who, after i had my fourth, suggested to my
>> parents that they get a lawyer and try to have me sterilized.
>> And, I had a pediatrician who suggested that i give my fourth child up
>> for adoption. She knew a mother who was bored and looking for a baby
>> to adopt.
>> A strange twist, when Kyler (my fourth) was 2yo, I met this woman. she
>> adopted two other children and had two teens. honestly, she was not
>> very  emotionally stable and she had this hero horn blowing complex.
>> And, to top it off, she was not very blind friendly and had a 4yo
>> blind adopted daughter. i found out later that she was the one who my
>> pediatrician was suggesting adopt my son.
>> UGGGG!
>>
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>
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