[blparent] Explaining vision loss to children

Thu Mar 1 16:27:36 UTC 2012

When people are unfamiliar with blindness they tend to feel a lot of 
anxiety.  I am glad she is asking questions that may, I hope, help her put 
matters in perspective.

Debbie

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)" <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
To: "'Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, March 01, 2012 8:05 AM
Subject: Re: [blparent] Explaining vision loss to children

> Debbie,
> Why is this an issue for this family to the point that someone would 
> contact you about it?
> I don't understand why this needs special treatment given that as parents 
> we explain all kind of stuff to our kids.  Is there more going on to 
> warrant a special discussion with these kids?
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On 
> Behalf Of Bridgit Pollpeter
> Sent: Wednesday, February 29, 2012 6:50 PM
> To: blparent at nfbnet.org
> Subject: [blparent] Explaining vision loss to children
>
> Debbie,
>
> With my nephews and nieces, and now Penny, it has been just a natural
> discussion and progression. They all have pretty quickly realized my
> husband and I didn't always respond the way others did, and on their own
> volition have started doing things like handing objects to us or tapping
> us when wanting to be picked up instead of holding arms up or using
> words, once speaking, instead of visual cues when wanting something.
>
> Perhaps we have had it a bit easier than some, but the blindness "issue"
> hasn't been that big of a deal. The kids range in age from eight to two
> now, but it has never been odd when Uncle Ross and Aunt Bridgey do
> things a little differently like actually touching their food to see how
> much has been eaten or placing a hand on their head to feel if they are
> nodding yes or no or asking them to use words or come to us when we call
> their name. We did at some point start discussing that Bridgey and
> Ross's eyes don't work very well, but that's not a bad thing, it just
> means we sometimes may use a different tool to accomplish things.
> They've had questions as they grow older and understand more and more,
> but it has never been awkward for either party.
>
> I think the constant exposure has helped along with their parents not
> making it a big deal either. They also see us doing "normal" things like
> house chores, reading, cooking, going to the park or running errands,
> etc, which continues to instill the idea that we are like everyone else
> even if we do some things a bit differently. They all love riding the
> bus when with my husband and I, grin. It is a novelty to them, something
> cool. And all the kids have asked to learn Braille at some point in
> time; our six-year-old niece actually picked up grade 1 Braille at age
> four.
>
> And of course, each has wanted to play with the canes. We have always
> told them that a white cane is not a toy, and shown them how to use it,
> and they all now know how to use proper cane technique. Penny, who is
> two, picked this up around age one and continues to use it properly when
> wanting to hold one of our canes.
>
> Because they have all been around us so much, it is not unusual or
> weird. Whenever we leave the house, one of the first things Penny does
> is hand us our canes. And when the now eight-year-old was four, he poked
> holes in his Christmas wish list for Ross and I so we could read it.
> None of them have ever been scared or concerned when in our care either.
> I think the most important element is to reiterate that being blind is
> not scary, and that people with blindness do things just like everyone
> else, but we do use some different tools and methods at times.
>
> Since the children you refer to are older, perhaps they can help grandma
> bake cookies or clean the house to see how she does things. This can
> reinforce how different techniques work just as well along with
> "showing" instead of "telling" how grandma can do things, and allaying
> any fears and concerns the grandchildren may have. I've found that
> approaching the subject naturally and in a laid-back manner works best.
>
> And let the kids ask questions. I often come across parents who stifle
> their kids questions when encountering my husband or me, and I'd rather
> they ask questions than grow up thinking this is wrong, and most likely
> perpetuating negative ideas towards blindness. Kids are very willing to
> have faith in something whereas many adults find it difficult to grasp
> certain ideas. If more people were exposed to positive ideas about
> disability at a younger age, we may have more adults not so willing to
> buy into old notions.
>
> Sincerely,
> Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter
> Read my blog at:
> http://blogs.livewellnebraska.com/author/bpollpeter/
>
> "History is not what happened; history is what was written down."
> The Expected One- Kathleen McGowan
>
> Message: 11
> Date: Tue, 28 Feb 2012 17:13:07 -0600
> From: "Deborah Kent Stein" <dkent5817 at att.net>
> To: "Multiple recipients of NFBnet blparent Mailing List"
>        <blparent at NFBnet.org>
> Subject: [blparent] Explaining Vision Loss to Children
> Message-ID: <00d801ccf66e$89745600$d70aa8c0 at Debbie>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="iso-8859-1";
>        reply-type=original
>
>
> I received a query from a sighted mom who wants ideas about how to
> explain
> her mother's progressive vision loss to her children - i.e., her mother
> is
> the children's grandmother.  The children are eight and five years old,
> and
> have always known their grandmother as fully sighted.  If you have any
> thoughts or suggestions, I'll pass them along.
>
> Debbie
>
>
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