[blparent] Teaching society about blindness

[Tay Laurie]

Usually, I don't mention my blindness unless it's asked about,. It's not a 
sticking my head in the sand approach, it's the same attitude I adopted with 
my wheelchair and other things. I see my disabilities as inconveniences, not 
a hindrance. Ok, I may never be able to drive or run a mile for a while, if 
ever, but that's ok. There are other ways of getting around.
If asked how I do such and such, i.e "How do you maneuver around the house?" 
I answer in a similar vein to, "Well, how do you?" IF the person says "I 
walk", I say, then I wheel, or if it's a very short distance, I walk. I know 
where corners are, and unless there's a stray piece of laundry, my husband's 
foot, etc in the way, I can usually do it relatively well. I've learned how 
to open doors and back up, using the chair's pull as the strength to open 
doors if I can't. I also know how to operate my chair, i.e folding footrests 
in or tucking arms in, to keep it tight enough to fit through the doroway. 
And I still have just enough sight to be able to use sharp knives, and I've 
only cut myself once, in the ten years I've done cooking.

I don't say this to brag, but I'm trying to point out that some of the more 
obvious questions come from someone who may not have logically thought about 
the issues. I had someone in the third grade ask if my eyes were clear. I 
made sure they were opened, turned to her and asked, "Well, do they look 
clear to you?" Because I wanted her to think about what she'd asked. I know 
some folks's eyes lose colour or look damaged, but save for the size being 
mismatched, mine don't. I try to teach people to think, not to ask stupid 
questions.
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Eileen Levin" <eileenlevin at comcast.net>
To: "'Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Tuesday, March 06, 2012 6:30 AM
Subject: Re: [blparent] Teaching society about blindness


>" When I run into females, even blind parents, I often break the ice with
> what I call a "conversation starter."  For people I meet, I tell them 
> about
> my blindness after I introduce myself.  "
>
> Dear Eric,
> First, I have no idea why you single out females for this approach. From a
> female perspective,  that's a bit weird!
>
> Second, being passionate about something can be very constructive. It also
> indicates a certain amount of need to deal with the subject one is
> passionate about. I'll be the first to admit that I am still dealing with 
> my
> blindness. However, when I meet people I want them to understand that my
> life is not consumed by blindness. I'm blind. Blindness has forced me to
> adjust and change so that I can provide for my family and parent my
> children. However, when I'm talking with other parents I want to talk 
> about
> our kids, current events, normal stuff that the average person likes to 
> chat
> about. If blindness happens to make it's way into the conversation I'm OK
> with explaining how I cope with this or that. People who confide in me say
> that I don't seem blind, which is silly since my eyes look damaged and I
> very much need a dog or cane to stay safe!  One thing I have noticed over
> the years is that the folks most likely to talk to me already have someone
> in the family with some kind of issue beyond the scope of "normal". It's 
> not
> the first thing they talk about. I usually discover the fact aftger 
> knowing
> them for quite some time.  Sometimes they want to know why their loved one
> doesn't come across as capable as I do. I do my best to find out the 
> facts.
> Generally the loved  one is newly blinded or having medical problems that
> consume all of their energy leaving very little space for adapting to
> blindness.   I also let them know that I had years of mobility and other
> adaptvie techniques training which really helps.
>
>
> Have fun educating the world about blindness. I would also encourage you 
> to
> try a conversation that is blindness free. The results may surprise you.
> Have a great day,
> Eileen
>
>
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