[blparent] People are funny

Jeri Milton jjmilton at cox.net
Tue Jan 15 21:21:30 UTC 2013 

These are so funny! I called my mom and read her all of them! 

Jeri

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Pickrell,
Rebecca M (TASC)
Sent: Tuesday, January 15, 2013 10:04 AM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [blparent] People are funny

And here's more you may like.  Think of a parent you know writing some of
these.


These are excuse notes from parents (including ORIGINAL SPELLING) collected
by schools from all over the country.

1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. Today. Please
execute him.

2. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

3. Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32,
and also 33.

4. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

5. Please excuse Roland from P.E. For a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a
tree and misplaced his hip.

6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt
in the growing part.

8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by
very close veins.

9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

10. Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

11. Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea)
(direathe) the shits. [words in ( )'S were crossed out.]

12. Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his
boots leak.

13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

14. Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

15. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I
don't know what size she wear.

16. Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get
the Sunday paper off the porch and when we found it Monday we thought it was
Sunday.

17. Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her
funeral.

18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a
weekend with the Marines.

19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could
not breed well.

20. Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with
gramps.

21. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.

22. Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.

23. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat,
headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat,
her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best
either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her
father even got hot last night.

24. Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father
is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with the
doctor...


-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jeri Milton
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 10:42 PM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [blparent] People are funny

These are great! I'm sending them to my dad, he'll love them.

You're right, I don't have to explain. Sometimes, I'm just too tired to
explain, you know what I'm mean? Sometimes I wish people would stop and
think about what they're asking or saying, before it comes out of their
mouths. I just wonder where the common sense is. Guess I better let it go
though.

Jeri

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Pickrell,
Rebecca M (TASC)
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 11:29 AM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [blparent] People are funny

        And here you go
1. "Left hand, right hand, it doesn't matter. I'm amphibious." - Charles
Shackleford

2. "Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team
below 100 points, they almost always win." - Doug Collins 3. "I owe a lot to
my parents, especially my mother and father" -Greg Norman

4. "Rich Folkers is throwing up in the bullpen." -Jerry Coleman

He's sick? I hope he can still pitch today.

5. "The drivers have one foot on the brake, one on the clutch, and one on
the throttle." -Bob Varsha 6. "You can sum up this sport [boxing] in two
words: 'You never know.'" -Lou Duva

7. "When you get that nice celebration coming into the dugout and you're
getting your ass hammered by guys-there's no better feeling than to have
that done." -Matt Stairs8. "The NFL, like life, is full of idiots." -Randy
Cross

8. "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what
time it is." -Lou Deva... again.
10. "You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that." -Murry
Mexted 13. "We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees." -Jason Kidd







-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Pickrell,
Rebecca M (TASC)
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 1:11 PM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [blparent] People are funny

You know, you don't have to explain. It's your information and your life it
doesn't mean you have to explain it to anybody.
Your neighbor sounds sweet and well meaning.  It also sounds like she's
aware of how she may come cross and is working on that.
If I can find it, I'll send the quotes from sports casters and coaches. I'm
sure what they *meant* to say sounded fine, but it just sounds wrong to
everybody else.

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jeri Milton
Sent: Saturday, January 12, 2013 9:34 PM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [blparent] People are funny

They're actually very nice neighbors, but the wife tends to say things and
then apolagise for what she said later. I think maybe she might have a screw
loose or something. Like back when we first moved in here I was pregnant
with Katlyn, she saw my husband out front. He told her that we were
expecting a baby soon and her reply was "Oh, I thaught maybe she was
pregnant, but sometimes it's hard to tell with bigger girls." Then she
apolagised quickly.

When she asked if I was pretending to watch Dylan, I just smiled and said Oh
Bev I'm watching him. Then she asked me if I was ever going to tell him that
I couldn't see him. Dylan was four years old at the time. I told her that
I've never hid it from him and that he's known since he was born. It's just
funny to me how people are really bewildered over the fact that we as blind
people can watch our children just as they can, if not better at times. I
don't know if I'll ever get use to it. Do comments from other people bother
any of you? I get so tired of explaining myself to them.

Jeri
Jeri

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jodie and
Kahlan
Sent: Saturday, January 12, 2013 12:35 PM
To: blparent at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [blparent] People are funny

Those remarksw would annoy me, too, especially the part about pretending to
watch. In the only way you can, you are watching him.

--
Hugs from Jodie and kahlan
"Only a fool walks into the future backward."
Terry Goodkind

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