[blparent] Just Venting 2

[Danielle Antoine]

 So continuing on. Not sure why all of my vent message didn't post.

 So Anyway, I didnt know I WAS expecting. So I am looking at jungle
 stuff but I didn't mention anything as I was not particularly sold on
 that. I did find girl colors in that theme, butthat is not her
 mother's style. I was looking for girly but in her mother's taste.

 I mentioned to my mom about my plans to get an idea about space
 restrictions, but nothing about a jungle theme or anything. Next thing
 you know a week later bags of stuff start piling in for my niece
 including jungle stuff. She bought that car seat I had in a zoo theme
 too. Everything from the gear to her clothes and toys too. Some
 borrowed, some new, some hand-me-downs, from Goodwil and everywhere.
 It didn't take all that. I didn't need any help. How did she know I
 had gotten as far as the jungle? And why did they contribute all
 things my children were into and stuff I had bought for them? And I
 certainly didn't need to be teased, mocked, and defeated like that.
 This doesn't feel like honor, appreciation, celebration and blessing!

 Why didn't she partner with me or ask if she could instead of asking
 about in the community like that? Hear come Minnie and Mickey Mouse (I
 had my first son's nursery done in that theme), zoo, farm, jungle (you
 may as well say safari too cuz it's all the same), fairies (which my
 only daughter loved), Disney Princess (she could've just done that),
 flowers, butterflies, ladybugs (my daughter's favorite), Sesame
 Street, Thomas the train (we used to collect engines and pieces as a
 family), Cars and Cars 2 (which my youngest son liked), cats, bunnies,
 dogs, pink and green (which are MY sorority colors), and just plain
 neutral colored gear as well. They already get all the latest name
 brand clothes and shoes as ssoon as it comes out. All her clothes look
 like the types of clothes I bought for my daughter on down to the
 little headbands. Eventually, my youngest sons umbrella stroller
 showed up. How that is possible I don't know but what I do know is
 that one afternoon I came home to find my husband had gone into the
 attic and gotten all of their stuff down and called a cab to bring it
 to the local homeless shelter. Nothing was said over hear when I
 inquired about the stroller and car seat.

 So I looked around to see what she didn't have, and bought a little
 farm themed walker that she could push around which prompted more farm
 toys showing up and hints about buying a bigger cow print car seat
 which I *did not*. How did they know I looked at that too? I started
 this journey on my Dell desktop, and continued on my Dell laptop. My
 mom did have her older brother's big car seat in the attic.

 I wanted to do that just to take the pressure off her and my mom
 because she had moved around a lot since the birth of her son and
 couldn't locate much of her stuff.  After all, my sister knew what she
 was having. She's a girl, right? She wasn't supposed to get pregnant
 after her son was born, right? She had a miscarriage, a stillborn, and
 then her son. And she had not prepared. I am done with my bratty
 spoiled niece though. The rest of the other 7 or 8 maybe them too.
 That is what so hurtful! So many more babies while I was prevented on
 every hand from preparing for mine, stressed, and pressured, and
 denied. That is why I say me and my children have been murdered. I
 never signed any papers to be sterilized in any way so not sure why
 folks are acting like this is the end of my mothering career. Some
 things were special to me and my other children and I wanted to pass
 those on, and share with them while starting fresh with my taste and
 ability.

 Even stuff I had put on a registry I started for myself had been taken
 for others. Amazon does not sell out of most things as soon as I put
 it up there. What I didn't buy, I had planned to give as gifts later
 on. Thanks for reading. But still let me know if a list of all those
 patterns in one place would be helpful, and what's been your
 experiences in this department?

 Danielle.