[blparent] Herding Cats and Children

Tue Oct 6 18:02:45 UTC 2015

Deborah Kent Stein should weigh in on this, since she has led the blind parents organization.

Judy

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jody Ianuzzi via blparent
Sent: Tuesday, October 06, 2015 11:50 AM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List
Cc: Jody Ianuzzi
Subject: Re: [blparent] Herding Cats and Children

The entire time my children were growing up I was always concerned that some well-meaning ignorant person was going to decide in their own mind that I was not fit to be a parent. I was very relieved when my children turned 18. Like many parents have said my children were never rested did, did drugs, or ended up in emergency room for any reason. That doesn't seem to matter to so many people if the parent is blind.One thing that I have thought about ever since the case of the mom who had her baby taken away for 57 days a few years ago is that perhaps the NFB should put together a roster of blind parents. If there was a list of thousands and thousands of parents who are blind raise their children and grandchildren etc. and perhaps that would be an excellent way to show people that it can be done and very well. 

What do you all think?

JODY 🐺
thunderwalker321 at gmail.com

"There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes."  DOCTOR WHO (Tom Baker)

> On Oct 6, 2015, at 1:05 PM, Jo Elizabeth Pinto via blparent <blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> That's one approach to take, and one I might have considered if I had been alone when I brought my baby home from the hospital.  I was alone at the beginning of my pregnancy, but my sighted partner had moved in with me by the time my baby was born, so I didn't have to worry as much about overzealous hospital staff.  That is somewhat ridiculous since in general, moms do most of the childcare, but that's another story.
> 
> The reason I'm not willing to consider hiring a sighted nanny at this point, just for show, is that my little girl is seven, nearly eight.  She's happy, healthy, and doing great.  It would be an additional expense for me, and it would also be a setback for blind parents.
> 
> Jo Elizabeth
> 
> "The Bright Side of Darkness"
> is my newly published novel,
> available on Kindle and in paperback at Amazon.com.
> -----Original Message----- From: Sarah Clark via blparent
> Sent: Tuesday, October 06, 2015 9:49 AM
> To: blparent at nfbnet.org
> Cc: Sarah Clark
> Subject: Re: [blparent] Herding Cats and Children
> 
> Interesting that you mention the sighted nanny thing.  My husband and I do plan to hire a sighted nanny for early on after we bring the baby home from the hospital for that very reason.  Though we obviously don't need it, we don't trust some hospital nurse to not get the crazy idea that we are blind 'so surely can't care for a baby on our own', and call CPS just based on her prejudice.  Obviously we know we would ultimately win the case should something like that arise, but we also know that they normally go ahead and take the child while they are investigating, and if that happened those critical early days/weeks for bonding would be lost, and we are not willing to take that chance.
> 
> Sarah
> 
> 
> 
> 
>> On 10/1/2015 5:10 PM, Jo Elizabeth Pinto via blparent wrote:
>> The thing is, sighted people often can't imagine how they would 
>> possibly keep track of active children without watching them.  It 
>> just blows their mind.  Within the last couple of weeks, I've had two 
>> well-meaning aunts say things that have really shaken me up and hurt 
>> my feelings.  I have a new novel out, and one of my aunts, who has a 
>> lot of contacts in the local business world, would like to get me an 
>> interview in the metropolitan newspaper about my book.  Her 
>> hesitation is that she's afraid if she brings a reporter and a 
>> photographer to my house to do a story about my book, Child 
>> Protective Services will be on their heels because they'll worry 
>> about the safety of a blind mother raising a sighted child.  My 
>> reassurances to her have so far fallen on deaf ears. Her older sister 
>> has actually suggested that I hire a sighted nanny for a little while, just to appease the public.
>> I've politely refused.  What I've told my aunts is that my daughter 
>> is well taken care of, she's doing fine in school, the house is clean 
>> if a little cluttered and not decorated to the nines, and my kid has 
>> never been to the emergency room with injuries or been brought home 
>> by the police.  Not every sighted parent can claim that. I've also 
>> told them that we blind parents tend to pay close attention to our 
>> kids each day, and we know what to listen for. We know what normal 
>> is, so when something doesn't sound right, we tend to pick up on it 
>> right away and check on them.  Like Tammy said, your new baby won't 
>> come out of the womb walking.  You'll figure out what her patterns 
>> are as you get used to her while she's learning to crawl and then 
>> walk, and you'll learn what to listen for as she becomes mobile.  
>> More often than not as my baby got around, I was the one telling her 
>> dad, "Hey, she's getting in your desk drawer again."
>> 
>> Jo Elizabeth
>> 
>> "The Bright Side of Darkness"
>> is my newly published novel,
>> available on Kindle and in paperback at Amazon.com.
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