[blparent] Herding Cats and Children

[Star Gazer]

J.E. if you wanted a nanny for whatever reason, get one. You don't, so
that's the end of it, but I wouldn't give two farts about blind parents. 
Sarah, why do you want a nanny? What do you expect this person to do? Are
you or your baby having complications? Will your husband be traveling a lot?

Many people hire nannies or au pairs, I'm thinking of the single mothers by
choice who tend to hire au pairs. I also know a couple families that hired
two au pairs, and one that had a nanny and an au pair. None of these
families have a blind parent


-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jo
Elizabeth Pinto via blparent
Sent: Tuesday, October 6, 2015 1:05 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Jo Elizabeth Pinto <jopinto at msn.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Herding Cats and Children

That's one approach to take, and one I might have considered if I had been
alone when I brought my baby home from the hospital.  I was alone at the
beginning of my pregnancy, but my sighted partner had moved in with me by
the time my baby was born, so I didn't have to worry as much about
overzealous hospital staff.  That is somewhat ridiculous since in general,
moms do most of the childcare, but that's another story.

The reason I'm not willing to consider hiring a sighted nanny at this point,
just for show, is that my little girl is seven, nearly eight.  She's happy,
healthy, and doing great.  It would be an additional expense for me, and it
would also be a setback for blind parents.

Jo Elizabeth

"The Bright Side of Darkness"
is my newly published novel,
available on Kindle and in paperback at Amazon.com.
-----Original Message-----
From: Sarah Clark via blparent
Sent: Tuesday, October 06, 2015 9:49 AM
To: blparent at nfbnet.org
Cc: Sarah Clark
Subject: Re: [blparent] Herding Cats and Children

Interesting that you mention the sighted nanny thing.  My husband and I do
plan to hire a sighted nanny for early on after we bring the baby home from
the hospital for that very reason.  Though we obviously don't need it, we
don't trust some hospital nurse to not get the crazy idea that we are blind
'so surely can't care for a baby on our own', and call CPS just based on her
prejudice.  Obviously we know we would ultimately win the case should
something like that arise, but we also know that they normally go ahead and
take the child while they are investigating, and if that happened those
critical early days/weeks for bonding would be lost, and we are not willing
to take that chance.

Sarah




On 10/1/2015 5:10 PM, Jo Elizabeth Pinto via blparent wrote:
> The thing is, sighted people often can't imagine how they would 
> possibly keep track of active children without watching them.  It just 
> blows their mind.  Within the last couple of weeks, I've had two 
> well-meaning aunts say things that have really shaken me up and hurt 
> my feelings.  I have a new novel out, and one of my aunts, who has a 
> lot of contacts in the local business world, would like to get me an 
> interview in the metropolitan newspaper about my book.  Her hesitation 
> is that she's afraid if she brings a reporter and a photographer to my 
> house to do a story about my book, Child Protective Services will be 
> on their heels because they'll worry about the safety of a blind 
> mother raising a sighted child.  My reassurances to her have so far 
> fallen on deaf ears. Her older sister has actually suggested that I 
> hire a sighted nanny for a little while, just to appease the public.
> I've politely refused.  What I've told my aunts is that my daughter is 
> well taken care of, she's doing fine in school, the house is clean if 
> a little cluttered and not decorated to the nines, and my kid has 
> never been to the emergency room with injuries or been brought home by 
> the police.  Not every sighted parent can claim that. I've also told 
> them that we blind parents tend to pay close attention to our kids 
> each day, and we know what to listen for. We know what normal is, so 
> when something doesn't sound right, we tend to pick up on it right 
> away and check on them.  Like Tammy said, your new baby won't come out 
> of the womb walking.  You'll figure out what her patterns are as you 
> get used to her while she's learning to crawl and then walk, and 
> you'll learn what to listen for as she becomes mobile.  More often 
> than not as my baby got around, I was the one telling her dad, "Hey, 
> she's getting in your desk drawer again."
>
> Jo Elizabeth
>
> "The Bright Side of Darkness"
> is my newly published novel,
> available on Kindle and in paperback at Amazon.com.
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