[blparent] Introduction and a question

Steve Jacobson steve.jacobson at visi.com
Tue Feb 16 23:05:21 UTC 2016


Everyone,

As the list moderator, please allow me to urge that we try to remember that
all of us come from different backgrounds, not just those who come to the
list as a new member.  Notes such as Tammy's below should not go to the
entire list but, if written at all, be directed to the individual to which
the comments were aimed.  Generally, you can do a "reply to all" and then
delete the list addresses to get the address of the individual.

Some of us here have had negative experiences where a well-intentioned
professional attempted to play a role in our lives that went beyond the role
that was prescribed.  Of course, this does not mean that all professionals
do that, nor does it mean that it is happening in this case.  However, our
roles, in my opinion, on this list are twofold.  Certainly we need to try to
provide accurate answers to questions that arise.  We are a very good
resource for information needed by blind parents.  In addition, though, it
seems reasonable to me that we also watch out for our fellow blind parents.
It does not seem unreasonable to me to suggest that this person be
encouraged to seek out information on her own.  By the same token, we also
must realize that there could be reasons she cannot connect with us
directly, and that it could be a violation of confidentiality for an
involved professional to share such reasons with the list.  It needs also to
be said that if we are asked questions and we do not know all of the facts,
our advice could be incorrect in some cases.

I have to think that a trained professional is going to have the ability to
analyze the information that is provided and also consider whether the
suggestion that the parent be encouraged to contact the list directly is
worth pursuing.  Parenting is a challenge, but as much as possible, we need
to be collecting our own information as blind parents, and we need to be
learning how to handle issues that come our way ourselves.  Some times we
need help getting to that point, and the professional in this case may
simply be trying to do that.  However, not every professional automatically
knows about the kinds of things many of us deal with every day as blind
adults and as blind parents.  The experience with blind people that many
professionals have is with blind children or with clients who are learning
to deal with blindness.  Therefore, we need to encourage the asking of
questions by list members and by professionals who may come to us for
information.  Let's be careful in our communication and consider that a
carefully raised question can create a sense of security that can make this
list even more useful.

Finally, remember that if you have a gripe with someone, take it up with
them off the list.  If you think something isn't on topic or appropriate for
the list, then write to me about it, not the whole list.  If you forget to
whom you should write, the moderator is listed on the web page for this
list.  Let's get back to helping each other. 

Best regards,

Steve Jacobson

-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Tammy via
BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 2:14 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Tammy <tcl189 at rogers.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question

Hi,

You're opinion was based on what exactly?  She asked for help for her 
client, someone we know nothing about aside from the fact that she is a 
mother with a toddler.  Why is it that most of the time you seem not to be 
able to help without being critical?  It's not your business whether the 
person is paying for services, and it's not your business whether the woman 
is in a relationship with the father or whether she got knocked up in a back

alley somewhere and knows nothing about the sperm donor as you call him. 
That's neither here nor there at the moment and doesn't concern us unless 
Liz or her client brings it up on the list for us to answer questions about 
etc.  She asked for help re baby and toddler issues.  So if you don't have 
anything nice or posative to add, please do us all a favour and shut up! 
I'm sorry all for the harshness of this post.  I will say no more on the 
subject unless help is needed.  I've made my point and will take my own 
advice and shut up now.  lol

Thanks,

Tammy

-----Original Message----- 
From: Star Gazer via BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 1:29 PM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Cc: Star Gazer
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question

We all have the right to express our oppinions. I think something isn't 
right here and I'm going to call it out especially if the personis being 
paid to help someone.

-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Annely Rose

via BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 1:25 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Annely Rose <annely53r at yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question

Thank you Tammy.  People make too many assumptions.  We don't know whether 
or not Elizabeth has told her client about this list.  And if she has and 
her client is seeing these negative posts, it would be a shame.  People 
should remember: If you can't say something nice or positive, don't say 
anything at all.  God bless you all.

Annely
--------------------------------------------
On Tue, 2/16/16, Briley O'Connor via BlParent <blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:

Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
To: "Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: "Briley O'Connor" <brileyoc at gmail.com>
Date: Tuesday, February 16, 2016, 11:57 AM

Hi there!

Baby wearing seems like the
best solution. Encourage her to find a local baby wearing  group and find 
Baby Wearing International resources very  helpful.

Thanks,
Briley
On Feb 14, 2016, at 5:55
PM, Elizabeth Bowden via BlParent <blparent at nfbnet.org>
wrote:

Hello Wendy,
Thanks so much for the encouragement I really  hope all that will happen is 
well.

Sent from my iPhone

> On Feb 14, 2016, at 4:07 PM, Wendy Meuse  via BlParent 
> <blparent at nfbnet.org>
wrote:
>
> hi
Elizabeth:  I am sure that there are car seats that can fit  in strollers. 
However I am a grandmother now, and the  strollers and  > car seat I used 
are  probably long gone.  I found a back pack very useful  though.  I just 
loved mine.  I hope you will get some good

> information from folks on this list
that are using or have used more modern strollers and car  seats then I had.

Perhaps she would  >  like to get hold of people on this list to get some 
good  ideas and to have lots of support.
>
----- Original Message -----
> From:
"Elizabeth Bowden via BlParent" <blparent at nfbnet.org>  > To: 
<blparent at nfbnet.org>  > Cc: "Elizabeth Bowden" <bowdenelizabeth5 at gmail.com>

 > Sent: Sunday, February 14, 2016 12:35  PM  > Subject: [blparent] 
Introduction and  a question  >  >  > Hello Little,  > My name  is Liz 
Bowden.  I am a blind independen Living instructor  instructing the mother 
of a toddler.  The mother would like  to  > take her child around in her 
community, but will have difficulty with a cane, stroller,  and a car seat. 
She primarily uses cabs for  > her transportation.  Do any of you use 
anything like a stroller car seat combination for your  toddler, and if so, 
what make and  >  model.  I have investigated options, and find them 
overwhelming.  Other solutions for the problem would be  welcome.
> Thanks In Advance.
> Sent from my iPhone
>
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