[blParent] Attaching a bell to a crawling baby

Jo Elizabeth Pinto jopinto at msn.com
Thu Oct 31 18:25:49 UTC 2019 

I taught my daughter from the time she could talk reliably that, especially outside the house, she absolutely had to answer me when I called her name. Otherwise, we'd quit whatever we were doing and go home or, if that wasn't possible, sit out the fun till we could leave. The lesson had stuck after we walked away from the park and the swimming pool once or twice.

Well, we had just moved to a new neighborhood the summer after her first grade year. I was barely familiar with our house and yard. She'd gotten too quiet while I was unpacking boxes in my kitchen, so I went outside and called for her. No answer. I called again, more loudly. No answer. Horrible possibilities burst into my mind in a nanosecond. I didn't know the street well, but it was much busier than the quiet condo complex we had left. Could my baby have been hit by a car? Could she have been snatched by some drifter from 7-Eleven or Taco Bell at the end of the block?

I yelled her name again, probably sounding like a total fruit loop in my panic.

"Mommy, I'm right here." her cherubic voice came from the edge of the front porch, about five feet away. "I just caught a cricket in my bug net. I couldn't answer you before or I would have scared him away. I'm going to name him Feisty."


Jo Elizabeth Pinto

Check out my author Web site at
http://www.brightsideauthor.com.

-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent <blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Sharon Howerton via BlParent
Sent: Thursday, October 31, 2019 8:09 AM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Sharon Howerton <shrnhow at gmail.com>
Subject: Re: [blParent] Attaching a bell to a crawling baby

Yes, always check when a little one is quiet! (Or, as my son with a 5.5 year old and a 4 year old plus their older half-sisters, when they are crying or especially noisy!) Kevin who has survived to the great age of 33 was really quiet one day at maybe a year old though I don't remember exactly. I looked everywhere or so I thought, feeling everywhere, walking everywhere in the house, checking for unlocked doors,  and found him curled up sound asleep under the dining room table So you have to know his brother Brendan who has survived to the great age of 36 and has children of his own loudly announced when we were outside, "Mom, remember when you couldn't find Kevin and he was asleep under the table?" 
When I taught parenting courses for blind parents with sighted children at Hadley, I often told my students that my sister-in-law, sighted and a very overprotective, controlling  mom, had more issues with their sighted kids, with both parents being sighted, than I had with mine with me being blind and their dad being visually impaired. I was always grateful that my sister-in-law had no idea I said this! !
Sharon  

-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent <blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Leslie Hamric via BlParent
Sent: Thursday, October 31, 2019 8:47 AM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Leslie Hamric <lhamric930 at comcast.net>
Subject: Re: [blParent] Attaching a bell to a crawling baby

Oh absolutely! When my son would be quiet and he was really little, I figured, too much quiet means he's probably up to something. Let me give you a couple examples. Things got real quiet when he was in the living room one time and I found him with the cord to my pacmate in his mouth. And my pacmate  was plugged in. Since I couldn't see what he was doing, I had to search for him with my hands. And at that time, the place a search first was the mouth. There was another instance where my son got really quiet and I found him standing up in the middle of my dining room table. I don't know how I knew to look for him is there, I just did. Follow your instincts. They will never lead you astray. My son and I had a conversation when he was about 2 1/2 or three about the fact that mommy can't see. At first, he said that he wished I wasn't blind. But then a few days later, he said he was going to fix my eyes with a screwdriver. I just thought that was cute. I told him that mommy reads braille and daddy reads print. And then he started referring to it as mommy's braille and daddy's print. I remember one time we were in the store and my son says, OK mommy follow me. Thank he was about seven at the time. And now,  he'll be 10 in January. My blindness is what he grew up with so he's always been very excepting about it. I don't make a big deal out of it so he is learn not to as well.Hth.
Leslie 

Leslie Hamric
Cello and Braille Music Teacher
Board member of National Federation of the Blind Performing Arts Division

> On Oct 31, 2019, at 8:09 AM, Michael Bullis via BlParent <blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> I always had the bell idea in the back of my mind while in the house but as it turned out I could hear where my daughter was and only occasionally used it.  I walked a lot without shoes on in the house so even if I touched her with my foot it wasn't a big deal.  Mostly, the rule applies--if they're quiet, they're into something they shouldn't be.  As they get older the trick is to know if they're quiet because they're reading a picture book or some such thing.  I kept a lot of contact but my rule was that my daughter had to have the same freedoms as if I weren't blind.  In the yard she did have shoes with bells on.  I often sat between her and the edge of the yard so if she started heading toward the street I could head her off.  As someone else has pointed out, you shouldn't have to have a sighted person around at all times.  It sends a bad message to your child that you're somehow not capable of being her parent.  Like many things about blindness, doing the right thing sometimes does take more work.  Keeping closer.  Paying more attention.  Listening and touching.  But, it was all so wonderful.  I'd never trade the experience.  
> When my daughter was about 3 or so, I tried to explain to her that I couldn't see.  At first she didn't understand what that meant exactly so I talked in terms of my eyes not working.  So, she thought about it and came to me a day or so later and told me she had decided I wasn't blind.  I asked her why and she said, "Because you do everything for me that mama does."  And, it was true.  I had pretty much figured a work-around for using vision for everything.  Now she's seventeen (just yesterday), and she's a wonderfully competent young lady.  She thinks that most people ask stupid questions about blindness and that it just isn't a big thing.  She can't understand how it would be.
> Good luck in your parenting.  It can truly be as wonderful for a blind parent as for a sighted parent.  Yes, parenting is scary sometimes because kids don't come with an instruction book and parenting is really on-the-job training, but hey, hundreds of millions have done it before you so jump in, the water's fine.
> Mike Bullis
> 
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlParent <blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Dacia Cole 
> via BlParent
> Sent: Thursday, October 31, 2019 8:53 AM
> To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: dacia.luck at gmail.com
> Subject: Re: [blParent] Attaching a bell to a crawling baby
> 
> My only concern about using a bracelet of bells on their wrist or ankle  is that they are more likely to put them in their mouth which could lead to them choking on them. If they are pinned to their clothing, it is much harder for them to get a hold of them. As for having someone always watching where they are, I don’t believe that is necessary. As others have stated, just walk carefully, and yes, you might touch them with your foot or accidentally lightly step on them, but every parent, even cited parents step on or accidentally trip over their children, because, they like to get under foot.
> 
> Sent from my iPhone
> 
>> On Oct 30, 2019, at 8:27 PM, sheila leigland via BlParent <blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>> 
>> When my son was a baby it would have been imposible to have a 
>> sighted person always around when he was not in a playpen crib or 
>> swing. Our pediatrician was wonderful and reminded me that Mark 
>> needed the freedom to explore his surroundings and that he couldn't 
>> and shouldn't be kept in a secluded emviornment. We developed age 
>> appropriate guidelines and trudsted ourselves to keep him safe. I'm 
>> not saying din
>> 
>> t seep the baby safe but allow him to grow and trust yourselves to be capable parents. My husband and I are totally blind and it can be done and done well.
>> 
>>> On 10/29/2019 2:31 PM, Tony Malykh via BlParent wrote:
>>> Sharon,
>>> 
>>> Has it ever happened to you that you kicked your son accidentally while walking?
>>> 
>>> Right now we try to have pretty strict rules in our home to always have a sighted adult watching over the baby and letting me and my wife know every time the baby crawls out of the playmat. But it actually requires a lot of energy to always keep thinking where is baby right now. So I'm thinking about relaxing the rules and I'm curious how safe it would be if we let the baby crawl wherever he wants and we just follow your advice to walk carefully.
>>> 
>>> And I guess, even if I kick the baby, that wouldn't do much harm (relatively), but I'm more worried about tripping over and falling on him.
>>> 
>>>> On 10/28/2019 11:19 AM, Sharon Howerton via BlParent wrote:
>>>> Tony, one of my students said they used to pin a bell to the back 
>>>> of their son's shirt so he couldn't get it off. When my sons were 
>>>> young, and they are now in their 30's, I just learned to walk very carefully!
>>>> Best of luck!
>>>> Sharon
>>>> 
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: BlParent <blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Tony 
>>>> Malykh via BlParent
>>>> Sent: Monday, October 28, 2019 12:30 PM
>>>> To: blparent at nfbnet.org
>>>> Cc: Tony Malykh <anton.malykh at gmail.com>
>>>> Subject: [blParent] Attaching a bell to a crawling baby
>>>> 
>>>> Hello all,
>>>> Our baby has started to crawl around the house, and in order not to 
>>>> trip over him, we'd like to attach a bell to him.
>>>> Where is the best place to attach the bell, and how can we attach it?
>>>> Safety pins come to mind, but I wanted to check if there are any 
>>>> better suggestions.
>>>> And also, are there any other solutions to this problem? Like maybe 
>>>> there is a smart electronic device that only beeps when blind 
>>>> parents are approaching...
>>>> 
>>>> Thanks!
>>>> Tony
>>>> 
>>>> 
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