[Colorado-Talk] PSA: from a chili cookoff competitor

[Hecker]

Hello,

I was asked to forward this message to the chili cookoff!

To the National Federation of the Blind (Mile High Chapter) and my
soon-to-be-defeated competitors,

My name is Licia, and I’m coming down from the High Plains Café at
Schriever Space Force Base to show you how we do things in the stratosphere.

I’ve heard this cook-off is a Mile High tradition, but I’m afraid I’m about
to ruin it for everyone else. My Green Chili is so powerful that Nate
Hecker (my boss, though I use that term loosely) had to sign a waiver just
to stand near the stove. He’ll be there at the Broadway Shot Spot acting as
my "assistant," which mostly means he’s tasked with holding my trophy once
the judges inevitably hand it over.

To my fellow cooks:
• The Red Chili Crew: I’ve seen your entries. They’re adorable. If I wanted
a bowl of spicy spaghetti sauce, I’d go to a cafeteria. This is a
competition, not a potluck for toddlers.
• The "Secret Ingredient" Folks: Unless your secret ingredient is "pure,
unadulterated victory," you’re playing for second place.
• The Broadway Shot Spot Staff: You might want to reinforce the foundation
of the building. The flavor profile I’m bringing has been known to cause
structural instability and spontaneous standing ovations.

To the NFB Colorado Mile High Chapter: I have immense respect for the work
you do, which is why I’m bringing my absolute best. You won’t need sight to
recognize a masterpiece; once that green chili hits the spoon, the sheer
complexity of my spice blend will provide a 4D sensory experience that will
make you forget other food even exists.

I’ll see you all at the Shot Spot. I’ll be the one smelling like success
and Hatch chiles. Nate will be the one looking stressed because he knows he
has to drive the champion home.
May the best chili win (which is mine),

Licia High Plains Café Legend & Your Future Green Chili Overlord
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