[Diabetes-talk] A Daughter's Story

[Donna Miller]

This is truly unfortunate. It's not fair, but I go through that type of 
thing dealing with my mother.


--The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they 
just make the best of everything they have.

Donna Miller

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----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Ed Bryant" <ebryant at socket.net>
To: "Diabetes Talk" <diabetes-talk at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Tuesday, November 25, 2008 4:11 PM
Subject: [Diabetes-talk] A Daughter's Story


> Hi Folks,
>    You may know we are working on past Voice editions which are not yet on 
> our website.  The following article is from Vol. 9 no. 4, Fall 1994.
>    I wonder how many of us can relate to this story?
>
> Regards,
> Ed Bryant
>
> A daughter's story
>
>
>
> Many people have known the agony of watching a family member waste away 
> from an incurable disease such as cancer.  Many times all even the doctors 
> can do is try to make the sufferer comfortable. Everyone tries to help. 
> The family draws together in this time of pain. 
> What happens when it is one of your own stricken, and you are blind?  When 
> your own family hasn't learned that blindness is not synonymous with 
> inability?  We know education is critical, and stories like the following 
> remind us why.                                      Olivia Ostergaard, 
> Treasurer of the National Federation of the Blind of California Diabetics 
> Chapter, lived through such a situation.  Although she had been living 
> independently for years, her own family, believing that "a blind person 
> couldn't handle it anyway," would not allow her to help care for her 
> diabetic mother, whose cancer had become terminal. 
> There is no good reason to bar any capable person from caring for a 
> stricken loved one.  In a time of such agony, the expression of ancient 
> prejudices about the blind compounds the pain.   "Imagine not being 
> allowed to cook a simple soup, because someone was afraid you'd burn it! 
> Imagine total strangers invading your territory, when you should be able 
> to take charge of the situation..." says Ostergaard. 
> When Olivia's younger (sighted) brother was given power of attorney over 
> their mother's affairs, Olivia felt left out and abandoned.  As she 
> states:                         "When we went with mother to the doctor, 
> my brother asked if she was terminal.  The doctor denied it, and ordered 
> more tests.  I privately protested, because my brother wasn't seeing what 
> I was seeing.  He was still living in his fantasy that our mother was 
> going to be all right.  I knew better.  I knew just by the way she was 
> acting.  Her thinking wasn't clear, sometimes.  My brother wouldn't listen 
> to me.  I was his blind sister, "who didn't know anything". 
> Four months later Olivia and her brother lost their mother to terminal 
> cancer.  Their agony needs no reinforcement here--but a simple point needs 
> making:  Blind folks can handle adversity!  In such a situation, the 
> burden can be eased by allowing ALL family members to carry their share of 
> it.   Knowledge is power.
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