[Faith-talk] Daily Thought for Thursday, September 5, 2013

[Paul]

Hello and good day to you all on this Thursday.  I hope and pray that, by God's matchless grace and His providential care, that you all are doing well on this day.

Again our article has no author's name or publication attached to it, but it was in a past issue of the Gospel Messenger magazine.  It is entitled "Fragrant Friendship" and is prefaced by a verse from the book of Proverbs which is as follows:  "Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel" (Proverbs 27:9 NIV).  The article itself is as follows:

"Come on, let's go walk early tomorrow morning." My friend called to encourage me to get up and exercise because I had been complaining about the way my clothes fit.

"You know, when our son was in the same situation, this is what worked for us." A friend offered some timely advice after I shared a concern about our adult offspring.

"There is no sense in beating yourself up about it.  It is over and done.  Pick up the pieces and move on." A colleague offered some good advice when one of my assignments had not worked out quite the way I had hoped.

"Have you ever considered that he did not mean it that way? Perhaps he is just concerned about you and is trying to help." A mentor offered an alternative perspective when I took offense at the word relative.

There are so many times when I needed the wise words of a friend to encourage me, to get my thoughts back on track, or to help me contemplate my options when I am making a decision.  I know I can operate on my own; but I also know that sometimes I get lost in the muddle of my own thoughts, and a good friend helps to bring perspective and sharpen my focus.

Good friends do that for us.  They love us enough to get involved, to offer advice, and to make helpful observations.  Giving counsel is a risky business.  What if you say the wrong thing? What if your friend gets upset? What if she does not want to hear what you have to offer her? Those are all real possibilities, yet I think a true friend is willing to take those risks.

The proverb of wise King Solomon pairs the statement about the earnest counsel of a friend with an observation about perfume and incense.  What an unusual combination, or is it? Perfume and incense arouse our senses, focus our thoughts, and linger long after the source is gone.  Is not good counsel just like that? Initially, when we hear words of counsel, we might become a bit defensive or uneasy.  We may even feel relieved or concerned.  But then we really think about the advice our friends have given us.  We examine their words from different angles and explore new possibilities for our current situation.  Then, days or hours later, we integrate those suggestions into our own circumstances.  We accept what we feel may help, and we modify or even discard other parts; yet the results are often the same as those Solomon describes:  Joy is produced in our hearts.  We find joy in knowing that someone cares about us enough to help us improve, to lift a concern, or to change our outlook.

So many people in our world live isolated, independent lives and are unwilling to risk establishing deep, trusting friendships.  But it is through friendship that God touches our hearts with His care and concern.  Through the voices of good friends, He reassures us that we are valued and loved.  In a society that values rugged individualism, dependence upon one another is sometimes discounted as a weakness.  But if we want the scent of sweet perfume of friendship to scent our relationships, we need to be willing both to receive and share earnest counsel as friends.  The Scriptures remind us that we please God when we love one another in words and in deeds.  Are you willing to both accept and offer fragrant friendship?

Dear Lord, help me to be a fragrant friend.  May the words I share bring joy to my friend's heart.  And may I have the humility to listen when she shares earnest counsel with me.  Amen.

Well, that article was obviously written by a lady and I hope that, whether you are a guy or a gal, that you received something from it.  One piece of advice that my late mom gave me that is expressed in the deuterocanonical book of Ecclesiasticus is this:  "May your acquaintances be many, but your friends one in a thousand." My late mom, upon my enthusiastic telling her of the wonderful "friends" I meet on the bus going to and from work, said:  "Paul, those aren't friends; they are mere acquaintances." Wise advice from a then 88-year-old lady.  Sometimes we as blind people need to differentiate our friends from our acquaintances.  That book of Ecclesiasticus in another place stated that we shouldn't be in a hurry to choose our friends, but to "take them on trial and find out what they want." In other words, they may use our friendship to further their own agendas.  I've had that happen to me more times in the past than I can count.

And now until tomorrow when, Lord willing another daily thought message will be presented, may the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob just keep us safe, individually and collectively, in these last days in which we live.  Your Christian friend and brother, Paul