[Faith-talk] Relationship Issues

[Linda Mentink]

Hi All,

I have read with interest all the posts.  Quite a few things 
crossed my mind as I read.

Firstly, Bill, as has been said, you're too eager, and will turn 
women off with this eagerness or pushiness.  A man tried that 
with me once.  I wasn't interested in marriage, but I gave him a 
chance.  He was a sighted man who played Bass Viol in the 
orchestra which accompanied a community choral group with which I 
sang for many years.  He was very oppressive, and was so full of 
himself, that I told him that there was no room for me, or anyone 
else in his life.  He asked me how to attract a woman.  I told 
him a few things!

Secoddly, to Erica's point about "shacking up," this one really 
bothers me.  I don't know who made the rule in the Social 
Security Administration that people living on SSI lose income 
when they marry, encouraging even Christians to disobey God's 
Word the Bible.  God never said to forget marriage if you 
wouldn't have as much mone coming in.  I believe that this is a 
serious sin, and that God will not bless those relationships, and 
the people in them, as much as He will those who live their lives 
in obedience to Him.  Those who do this are defiling the marriage 
bed, and committing adultery.  Shame on the American leadership 
for putting this rule forward and enforcing it!

Thirdly, anyone desiring to be married should study the passages 
on this in the Bible, especially if they are Christians.  We are 
not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers, so fellowship with 
those of like precious faith.  The blind Christian needs to 
handle himself or herself appropriately, and must be confident, 
not helpless and dependent on others.  Marriage is a partnership, 
and a sighted person is not going to even want to enter into a 
marriage relationship with a blind person who can't take care of 
themselves.  As to how far you should go, keep your clothes on.  
And, if you're a man, and you can't support a woman, get a job.  
God commands mothers to be keepers at home, which society has 
disobeyed.  The man is to be the head of the home, as Christ is 
the head of the Church, and its up to him to provide for his 
family.  The woman should stay at home and raise the children.  
That's the Biblical plan.  Some have worked it out so that the 
woman goes to work and the man stays home, in the case of some 
blind friends I know.  And in some cases, both work.  It's tough 
to figure this all out, but it should be done prayerfully.

I am 61, and have remained single and a virgin.  I have had 
relationships over the years, but they didn't work out.  I am 
very content as a single woman.  Paul encourages us to be as he 
is, thereby being able to serve the Lord more fully.  Because I 
don't have to divide my time between taking care of a husband and 
family and serving my Lord, I can be single-minded inservice to 
Him.  I know many who serve the Lord together as couples, and 
most couples I know and fellowship with are happy, well-adjusted 
people raising their children in the church.

If we are willing to obey God's precepts, we will save ourselves 
from a lot of heartache.  Commit your way to the Lord, and He 
will give you the desires of your heart.

I hope this makes sense!

Blessings,

Linda