[Faith-Talk] my testamony

[andrew edgcumbe]

Hi thought I would send my testamony here in case it helps somebody.

My testamony

   I was born in a
Christian home. I have  both of my parents who are christians. I did
have some site where I could see some things like colour and stuff
like that I could see if the sun was out or not and  I could see some
things but at the age of 11 I lost the rest of my sight. I lost it due
to retnal detachment. I had gone to the doctor because I was
experiencing flashes in my eyes and then couldn't see colours. Anyway
I asked the lord into my heart somewhere around there. I did the
praying and the whole thing i never stopped going to church at all but
 for while I never really did much praying or my focus was not church
or christian centered.  At the end of high school I  or close to end
of high school I did redicate my life back to the Lord.  Not long
after that I did get baptized. Now after all of this I found that
life was not easy at all.  I have always had allot of struggles
fitting in and finding some friends with whom I could connect with. I
have had so much trouble finding ways to serve and stuff like that.
I have experienced discouragement and depression to degree over the
years.  I have even struggled finding ways to serve  I was basically
told that i couldn't do sound board i did answer phones at church for
time being but then it got to point where i just needed something i
could actually do  more things. I didn't get any calls that came in or
anything. I  had tried to do other things all to no success. I never
found that I fit into group activities at all to great at times either
i was left out or all some wanted to do was play board games and stuff
like that. I also found that I  I had a hard time really connecting
and really trying to find friends  even to this day I don't have the
friends I need no phone calls or anything  Even though I have gone to
a local church i never have gotten phone calls even during covid 19. I
may have gotten couple calls but after that nobody called me nomore.
I have had troubles  with different things. I have had people saying
to me things like I need a healing from my physical blindness and
stuff like that. I also have  been told to seek my healing. One
particular time I went to a youth service. My parents own a bible camp
but anyway  I went to this service and i sat down then a prayer time
started. Anyway two guys came over to me and basically it was then I
got surrounded over my blindness these guys were right in my face
about it and told me to seek my healing and stuff like that. Anyway
eventually they did let up but itwas so sad they could be like that. I
  about 3 years ago almost 4 years ago moved out into my own
apartment.  I am not suggesting that wasn't trouble free either but i
still went to church  and stuff like that  but even to this day i
can't seem to stick to any particular one so far as of before covid 19
I felt no connection anywhere. Anyway within the last couple years or
so I  have had my share of things. two people I knew from my building
well or sort of well passed away last summer so I had to go to couple
funerals.  Anyway in September i ended up in a conversation with
somebody online and things went down hill to point i either felt  a
certain way or I just whatever but anyway about 1 in the morning the
police came as they got a call and wanted to check. Anyway  I have
always been feeling lack of activity and lack of things to do to feel
not only connection but feel useful. So i think that was causing some
depression.  I went to  some counciling.  I had been trying to figure
out over these last few months some other thingsi could do far as
finding that active life.  I  about  had started looking into guide
dog stuff looking at different information i did that later December
2019 or so. I  actually  January started talking to guide dog schools
asking questions and stuff like that. I found that later January i
applied to my first guide dog school. One of the things I have wanted
was to be able to get around allot more independently. I then about
closer to end of February actually got excepted to the school in the
states. Then I had tried to get started with some training from
orginization called CNIB that is in Canada. I seen the instructor once
and  then boom Covid 19 hit. So they  all they could do was get my
goals on file.  I have many desires still in my life I have found i
have many desires of my heart or things I would like to do or be able
to do. I have both good and bad days even now days because things were
brought to a  stop when I thought things would be moving forward. Some
days I felt like my life has been totally recked and other days I have
felt okay. I know God is good all the time but I know  it is still
tough for me life over all is tough for me.  I just wanted to share my
story from when i was young up until now.