[Faith-Talk] serving and connection

andrew edgcumbe rollercoasterman86 at gmail.com
Sat Aug 10 23:19:14 UTC 2024


I am in the town of Hanover here in ontario Canada.

On Sat, Aug 10, 2024 at 5:39 PM Ericka via Faith-Talk <faith-talk at nfbnet.org>
wrote:

> Where are you in Canada specifically?
>
> Ericka Nelson
>
>
> > On Aug 10, 2024, at 4:31 AM, andrew edgcumbe via Faith-Talk <
> faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >
> > well there is transportation but the specialized vans don't do
> > transportation in the evenings.  they do friday evening and saturday
> > evenings but no churches do anything on those nights except for youth
> > groups which i am to old for.
> >
> > The cnib i have not gotten anywhere with them there is no blind groups in
> > my area at all.
> >
> >> On Sat, Aug 10, 2024 at 5:14 AM bruce&joy breslauer via Faith-Talk <
> >> faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >>
> >> Do you have a service or a program that can teach you orientation and
> >> mobility skills, or is there somewhere you could go to learn daily
> living
> >> skills like cooking, cleaning, laundry, hygiene, handling finances,
> reading
> >> Braille, using computers, learning job skills, or whatever it is you
> need
> >> to learn or need to build up your confidence doing?  I don't know if
> >> blindness is your only disability. I don't know what you need so I'm
> just
> >> including a random list.  You say you live in a small town, so I don't
> know
> >> what transportation options are available to you.  Some places have
> busses
> >> or vans for the elderly or handicapped, and some have busses that
> anybody
> >> can ride if you know the schedule.  Are there any groups who help the
> blind
> >> learn things they need to learn in order to be on their own
> successfully?
> >> You say there aren't any other blind people around, so you can't learn
> from
> >> someone as a mentor.  But I know there is a Canadian group for the
> blind.
> >> I just looked it up and there is more than one.  The first one I came to
> >> was the Canadian National Institute for the Blind.  They say they have
> >> local chapters all over Canada, and they might even have at large
> chapters
> >> which meet by phone or by zoom if you are too far from a local
> chapter.  If
> >> you look up your province on the list, they will tell you the phone
> number
> >> to call. I don't know if that interests you, but if they can't help you,
> >> perhaps they can point you in the direction of someone who can.
> >>
> >> I just came across a really cool thing on their web site.  They have a
> >> mobile van that they can bring to your community at no cost.  Here is
> what
> >> their web site says about it:
> >> Meet the CNIB Mobile Hub – a new program delivery model where we visit
> >> your community to deliver in-person programming at no cost to you. Drop
> in
> >> to meet CNIB staff and learn more about free programs and resources for
> >> people who are blind, Deafblind, or have low vision. Enjoy a day of
> >> recreational and social activities, technology workshops, and much more.
> >> Experience the latest breakthroughs in assistive tech from CNIB
> SmartLife
> >> and connect with other members of the sight loss community.
> >>
> >> To see where we’re headed next, check out our tour schedule.
> >> https://www.cnib.ca/programs-and-services/live/cnib-mobile-hub
> >>
> >> I hope some of this helps.
> >>
> >> I think some of the changes you're seeking may start with you.  You're
> the
> >> one who knows yourself best and knows what you need.  Joy
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> -----Original Message-----
> >> From: Faith-Talk <faith-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of andrew
> >> edgcumbe via Faith-Talk
> >> Sent: Saturday, August 10, 2024 2:16 AM
> >> To: Faith-talk, for the discussion of Blindness in faith and religion <
> >> faith-talk at nfbnet.org>
> >> Cc: andrew edgcumbe <rollercoasterman86 at gmail.com>
> >> Subject: Re: [Faith-Talk] serving and connection
> >>
> >> Hi  I know  I guess the thing that stops me is not only  self confident
> >> end of thing that is stopping me but in my area  i wouldn't be welcomed
> on
> >> to most construction sights I think that kind of is really  well I don't
> >> know.
> >> My family never  has never pushed me to advokate in anyway.
> >>
> >> While I  for most part moved out on my own  most cases my family  has
> >> never  whatever I think that even they don't know what blind people to
> do
> >> because they have never bothered to educate themselves.
> >>
> >> I have conversations with people  from latest c latest church i
> currently
> >> go to and they say it is to bad that  or say they understand i want to
> do
> >> more  but no effort was ever made for me to help out.
> >>
> >> There is no hiking groups in my area at all. I tried to look for them
> and
> >> look for  stuff along those lines.
> >> With trips and stuff i just don't know how to even find way  ways to go
> to
> >> these places i would want to go to. going on these adventures to me is
> not
> >> a problem but it is finding people to do these things with Water parks
> >> would be harder to do if person doesn't ride water slide because I
> wouldn't
> >> know my way around in water parks and stuff.
> >>
> >> I really  far as youth group did go on few of the trips actually as well
> >> like he did accomidate way in a sence.
> >>
> >> There is hardly any other blind people seen in the community here. So i
> >> live in a smaller town in a sence.
> >>
> >> allot of people around here don't have the blind person can do it
> attitude
> >> and for me to  be  advocating for myself totally alone or like the lone
> >> ranger trying to advocate myself is very hard or would be very hard and
> to
> >> me it is hard to  and very tiring to explaine to people i cn can cross a
> >> street and stuff like that for example.
> >>
> >> Not every place in town is excessible I can only get to one grocery
> store
> >> in town out of the 2 or 3 others bu by myself because of the
> >> inexcessibility of the parking lots no way for pudestrians to get in
> there
> >> without dealing with bunch of cars in and out  I can't go to a sub
> place at
> >> all one of them because there is no safe way to get there at all even o
> and
> >> m never could figure it out.
> >>
> >> part of me really wishes that somebody could at least help me with the
> >> advokating part of things at the very least that is the thing.
> >>
> >> Like I do go to a day program for people with disabilities but most
> times
> >> i am just sitting there doing nothing.  I am always left out of the
> games
> >> they are doing and left out of video games and i used to be in another
> day
> >> program last year but they didn't do very good at getting me playing
> games
> >> because these certain ones were playing the card or board games I never
> got
> >> a turn or anything like that.
> >>
> >> Also they never gave me chance to know my way around at all they never
> >> gave me chance to They never  whatever I never used the bathroom while
> >> there because I didn't feel i could be independent over  independent
> >> because they were almost treating me differently like you need help with
> >> this and that type of thing.
> >> even their vollunteer drivers especially one in particular ansisted on
> >> putting my seatbelt on but that was only one he put it on before i had
> >> chance to say anything so when I was coming home and he was doing
> something
> >> else i quickly put it on.
> >>
> >> So i ended up leaving that particular program.
> >>
> >>
> >> People around here really don't want me to help out with stuff  each
> time
> >> i mention it to my mom she is like i don't know what to tell you.
> >>
> >>
> >> I just feel so alone in my struggles and i hate being so alone in the
> end
> >> of advocacy and i know i need to do it probably but i don't know how to
> >> really build that self confidence when people are not as open to me
> doing
> >> things or blind people doing things.
> >>
> >> It feels like i am always being watched and stuff.
> >>
> >> I don't mind people helping me but when they help me to much just
> because
> >> i am blind it can really be over whelming.
> >>
> >> I don't know how to use discord I can never get it to work for me and  i
> >> been trying to figure it out on my computer but it is very hard because
> >> allot of the time i don't know how to make it work and how to
> whatever.  as
> >> allot of things are not excessible.
> >>
> >> I have a real hard time finding out about events in my area weather it
> is
> >> restaurants or web sites not always info is even excessible and miss
> stuff.
> >>
> >> I had been trying to fix that events thing by having a facebook group
> >> somebody else helped start but facebook becao became un became the
> option
> >> that is out the door because i have not been able to log in for whole
> month
> >> because i kept getting error messages like sorry we will fix it
> something
> >> went wrong usually it fixed but this time it is that way for 4 weeks
> now or
> >> a month i use facebook on my computer so i can't access the group on
> >> facebook. i even tried resetting passwords and everything so no go.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> On Sat, Aug 10, 2024 at 2:38 AM Ashley Bramlett via Faith-Talk <
> >> faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >>
> >>> Hi,
> >>> That is too bad you did not feel too included as a Christian teenager.
> >>> Well, its too bad you did not have your mom or family member advocate.
> >>> It sounds like the adult leaders had misconceptions and did not seek
> >>> to educate themselves about inclusion and that is real sad.
> >>>
> >>> When I was in youth groups, I did most things but not other activities.
> >>> Like you though, I went to because I wanted to be out of the house and
> >>> my parents just said it was available and I should go like my brothers
> >> did.
> >>> I think they told the youth group leaders about sighted guide and to
> >>> describe things to me such as when they served dinner or snacks to
> >>> tell me the options before serving me; but not too much else.
> >>> I was finding myself as a teen like all other teens and did not know
> >>> all of what I needed but did do some advocating.
> >>>
> >>> If the group did sports, I was left out, but for most activities, I
> >>> went to them. It was a long time ago so I do not even remember what we
> >>> did. I think we did some prayer, stories, drama, simply socializing,
> and
> >> singing.
> >>> We also had some fun outings and some I attended such as bowling.
> >>> I have some memories of youth retreats too.
> >>> The adult leaders did accommodate me sometimes.
> >>> At the time I did not have a braille Bible so when we did our Bible
> >>> story time, I think one of the leaders read to me.
> >>> Much of the retreat was to hang out and talk and have plenty of food.
> >>> I remember having a good time overall.
> >>>
> >>> I think you need to advocate for yourself! Maybe you can find other
> >>> friends with your same disability to hang out. In my area, there are
> >>> day programs for people with developmental disabilities so maybe try
> >>> to find one. If you use a Ipad or Iphone, there are apps to chat with
> >>> people who share your interests such as the clubhouse app. Oh and
> >>> there is discord too. Not the same as a real place to hang out but it
> >>> would give you the connection to talk to people.
> >>>
> >>> You can certainly go to adventure activities such as amusement parks,
> >>> Andrew!
> >>> In my area there are clubs for that. There is a hiking club and a
> >>> running club and some others. Maybe try finding a club to do this with.
> >>> Just go sighted guide and have someone tell you the rides they see
> >>> around and pick some to go on. Its fun.
> >>>
> >>> If someone told you that you cannot work with the elderly, that is
> >>> real discriminatory and you should absolutely not have to bring
> >>> someone with you to perform that task of being a friendly visitor.
> >>>
> >>> Finally, you can certainly do hands on activities. I do not know what
> >>> is stopping you still. I just think you lack self confidence.
> >>> So, look for a service project and go for it. Fill out the
> >>> applications and steps for it and go for it.
> >>> If they tell you no, go to the head of the organization. If no
> >>> resolution, if it were me, I'd blast them! I'd go to the media, write
> >>> letters to the editor about me being barred from serving and working
> >>> for no money expected, and then get the equivalent of NFB involved. I
> >>> know you have something like the NFB in Canada
> >>>
> >>> I've not done much hands on work and moving around tables and chairs,
> >>> but I know blind people who did do it. I also have heard of several
> >>> blind people doing it from NFB articles and lists.
> >>> You could serve on a house project with the equivalent of Habitat for
> >>> Humanity. You could serve at a soup kitchen. Some nonprofits here have
> >>> projects to move in donated furniture and beautify houses and you
> >>> could do that.
> >>> I'm sure your country has something similar.
> >>> Blind people have done these things. Just have someone show you what
> >>> to do. If its hands on work, that can be done by touching the tools.
> >>> You could perhaps start by organizing items or participating by
> >>> handing group members tools or help lifting things assuming you have
> >>> the strength to do it. For instance, if you are bringing in supplies
> >>> to repair something in a home, you can help carry it and unload
> supplies.
> >>> If you go on a campfire outing and you want to help get the fire
> >>> ready, carry the supplies over for it.
> >>>
> >>> These service projects are doable and you should not be stopped. I'll
> >>> send a few links to articles about people serving in ministry to help
> >>> the homeless and other vonerable populations.
> >>>
> >>> I have some vision and use a cane. So,  I have to first tell them a
> >>> little about what I do not see since I look normal. Sometimes it seems
> >>> like totally blind people are accepted less. If you have blindisms,
> >>> like rocking, try to stop. That is off putting to people.
> >>>
> >>> It can be done. These articles speak of overcoming the misconceptions
> >>> other sighted people had but they did it and participated.
> >>>
> >>> HTH,
> >>> Ashley
> >>>
> >>> -----Original Message-----
> >>> From: Faith-Talk <faith-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of andrew
> >>> edgcumbe via Faith-Talk
> >>> Sent: Saturday, August 10, 2024 1:20 AM
> >>> To: Faith-talk, for the discussion of Blindness in faith and religion
> >>> < faith-talk at nfbnet.org>
> >>> Cc: andrew edgcumbe <rollercoasterman86 at gmail.com>
> >>> Subject: Re: [Faith-Talk] serving and connection
> >>>
> >>> I have even asked my mom and stuff about vollunteer opportunities and
> >>> she has no idea's for me either.
> >>> I did go to youth groups and stuff earlier and I like Ashley was left
> >>> out of some activities in fact I was all by myself when they went to
> >>> play their games in the Gym.
> >>> They often didn't include me in much but i still went to get out of
> >>> the house.
> >>>
> >>> I also asked some young people to hang with me as well at times and i
> >>> always found that they just didn't seem to want to and it was like
> >>> they didn't care to hang with me.
> >>>
> >>> People don't seem to want to do much with me I don't know if it is
> >>> because they trh think they need to help me or they think there is  or
> >>> it is to complicated to hang out with a blind person I just don't know
> >> what it is.
> >>>
> >>> or if it is because people don't want to deal with those with
> >> disabilities.
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>> On Fri, Aug 9, 2024 at 11:45 PM Brian Hatgelakas via Faith-Talk <
> >>> faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >>>
> >>>> you said it 100 percent correctly!
> >>>>
> >>>> On Fri, Aug 9, 2024 at 11:15 PM Ashley Bramlett via Faith-Talk <
> >>>> faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >>>>
> >>>>> Hi,
> >>>>> It sounds like you are lonely.
> >>>>> It sounds like you want someone to assist you with walking and
> >>>>> getting
> >>>> out
> >>>>> in the community for fitness participation and social activities.
> >>>>> I'm going to a church with my dad which is also small and most
> >>>>> members
> >>>> are
> >>>>> older or maybe adults middle age with families.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> I have not exactly asked to serve but I suspect they would be fine
> >>>>> with most activities. I have considered helping out with the youth
> >>>>> group.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> I am also seeking a fitness buddy to have nature walks with or
> >>>>> simple
> >>>> trail
> >>>>> walking or tandem biking.
> >>>>> But, so far I did not find anyone. I asked our nearest chapter of
> >>>> Achilles
> >>>>> international, dc chapter,
> >>>>> But did not find anyone; no response yet.
> >>>>> So, I know what you mean about needing a guide to do activities
> >>>>> with and finding no one. I can and do exercise alone at a gym such
> >>>>> as by using the seated bikes or treadmills but I do so much desire
> >>>>> to do some outside
> >>>> walks
> >>>>> or biking and go with someone so I can focus on the walk and
> >>>>> exercise,
> >>>> not
> >>>>> my mobility skills.
> >>>>> I also want more social connections either from the church or
> >>> elsewhere.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> It sounds like you have other disabilities given how this is
> >>>>> written and how you write here. I do not know your full situation.
> >>>>> I'm just speculating.
> >>>>> It would be helpful to know what you really mean. So far your
> >>>>> emails are vague saying that You simply are not accepted and you
> >>>>> are not finding connections.
> >>>>> What do you want to do? Some examples? What were some things you
> >>>>> tried
> >>>> and
> >>>>> were rejected from?
> >>>>> Saying you have lack of opportunity does not tell us much.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> I do not mean to be critical but you have written things like this
> >>>>> before and it comes up year after year.
> >>>>> Only by getting specific can we help some.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> Writing things like this
> >>>>> " It is like people have been so hazatant to do anything or to
> >>>>> support me or help me find those opportunities either as part of a
> >>>>> church or even ministry and stuff like that."
> >>>>> Does not say much.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> Have you tried finding connections through a community website?
> >>>>> Here we have www.meetup.com, but I'm not sure you have that.
> >>>>> I've not used this myself, but I know it's a way to find groups to
> >>>>> meet
> >>>> up
> >>>>> with.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> I do hope you find something. If there is a Christian ministry for
> >>>>> the blind in Canada where you are, maybe you can help them, even
> >>>>> if its remotely.
> >>>>> Here in the USA we have Christian Record Services and Lutheran
> >>>>> Braille Workers; both are far from my home of VA but I've
> >>>>> considered trying to do something with them  remotely. Maybe
> >>>>> writing something or conducting something over a video platform like
> >> zoom.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> You have to educate people about your abilities too. You may not
> >>>>> be asked to help as they do not know what you can do or how you
> >>>>> can do it, so do educate them.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> Anyways, with more specifics, maybe we can give more suggestions.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> Ashley
> >>>>>
> >>>>> -----Original Message-----
> >>>>> From: Faith-Talk <faith-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of
> >>>>> andrew edgcumbe via Faith-Talk
> >>>>> Sent: Friday, August 9, 2024 10:27 PM
> >>>>> To: Faith-talk, for the discussion of faith and religion
> >>>>> <faith-talk at nfbnet.org>
> >>>>> Cc: andrew edgcumbe <rollercoasterman86 at gmail.com>
> >>>>> Subject: [Faith-Talk] serving and connection
> >>>>>
> >>>>> Hi
> >>>>> My name is Andrew for those who don't know me.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> I have just had struggle after struggle with  just being able to
> >>>>> serve as part of a church body and stuff like that other then
> >>>>> maybe music and
> >>>> stuff
> >>>>> like that.
> >>>>> To me the experience is they don't know what to do with me because
> >>>>> of my blindness and stuff like that.
> >>>>> It is like people have been so hazatant to do anything or to
> >>>>> support me
> >>>> or
> >>>>> help me find those opportunities either as part of a church or
> >>>>> even ministry and stuff like that.
> >>>>> The answer I always get is just pray about it while we should do
> >>>>> that
> >>>> and i
> >>>>> been doing that all along but faith should be followed up by
> >>>>> action to
> >>>> and
> >>>>> stuff like that.
> >>>>>
> >>>>>
> >>>>> While I don't know other area's speciffically my church is a very
> >>>>> small church so it is limited but I want to find christian
> >>>>> ministries who actually let blind people serve even if it is from
> >>>>> home or some other way.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> The other area is that i have trouble making connections that
> >>>>> really
> >>>> foster
> >>>>> into more then just sunday morning fellowship.
> >>>>> I have tried to find hiking partners and finding other things.
> >>>>> i reached out to couple of the other churches for walking buddies
> >>>>> and
> >>>> stuff
> >>>>> like that and just other people whom perhaps i can really make
> >>>>> connection with from a church to do coffee with or do other things
> >>>>> with and I don't know they are afraid of the fact i am blind I
> >>>>> don't
> >>> know what it is.
> >>>>> I just been really looking for answers as to what to do with
> >>>>> myself like
> >>>> i
> >>>>> have few people in building i connect with but they have
> >>>>> disabilities
> >>>> that
> >>>>> keep them from doing walks with me or  other adventures I would
> >>>>> like to
> >>>> be
> >>>>> able to go on and stuff like that.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> I struggle making connection through or  church or community  like
> >>>>> I said even a buddy of mine has tried to talk to t others about
> >>>>> others about walking with me or what not but there is great
> >>>>> hazatation and never had
> >>>> any
> >>>>> luck weather it is walking or ki hiking and stuff like that.  or
> >>>>> even people to really connect with.
> >>>>> _______________________________________________
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> >>>>> --
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> >>>> --
> >>>> *Brian P. Hatgelakas | *
> >>>> 318 Washington Road, #212, Pittsburg, PA 15216
> >>>> C: 412.862.8644  *I* E: bhatgelakas at gmail.com
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