[Home-on-the-range] Changing what it means

[Cindy Ray]

I find that if I don't really force myself, it is easy for me to fall back. We can talk the beliefs that we espouse in the NFB, but do we really live them. I hae had a couple of experiences with my example. When Antoinette was little, I used to take her with me everywhere I went. She was precocious, so I got information from her about my surroundings. Now, that is all good until such time as people start telling you how wonderful she is, and telling her what a good little girl she is. One day I took her to the daycare center where she went and then went to Weight Watchers. I realized two things. The first was that I was nervous about if I could find it without her. The second was when she asked me how I was going to find it without her. I didn't even realize.
Yesterday, I started my volunteer chaplaincy work as a solo; I tried to figure out a way to avoid doing it because I wasn't sure I could. I did though, and it was a good experience. We have to realize that if we get a little lost, it doesn't matter what people think; what matters is that we do it, ask for help when we really do need to, and then do it. We have to continue telling ourselves we can, thus continually reshapping the meaning of what it is to be blind in our own hearts and minds and souls.

Ramblings of an old lady,
Cindy Lou

On May 1, 2013, at 6:50 AM, Dianne Hemphill <diannehemphill at cox.net> wrote:

> ...good discussion...I sometimes think it is easier to note what it is that has changed in order to recognize that change has happened both within ourselves and how others think of us. For example, the first thoughts in our head when we go out to a social event  of public gathering, or when we apply for a job, or have a family, is not how will we do these things without vision or low vision but rather not much thought at all. That is, these activities are so "normal" for us as the blind that it is common place...that we will do things as well or poorly as others, not because we're blind, but because we're part of the human race... The challenges that we will have are that of others ...When people see us coming into a social situation, walk into an office for a job interview, raising a family, etc., there is no thought about who is helping that person, will I have to do things for them, how kind and generous their spouse or kids are to help this person and on and on. The public will not have  negative thoughts , the moment  we show up somewhere because this is the expectation  of everyone, even the blind. ..People will not come up to us assuming we need all kinds of help. They will not tell your kids how wonderful they are for taking care of you. They will not assume that your friend, partner, spouse is with you because they must have some internal need to do things for others. The interviewer will not jump to every negative stereotype  that there has ever been when you come in for an interview. People will not think it is perfectly fine to tell you how wonderful it is that you look good and that everything matches so well,  that you're always so happy, that you get around so good...these comments would never be told to someone with vision in the same way...that is, they would never had believed that a blind person could get it together in the morning and put on a decent outfit; that we can go somewhere by ourselves, that we can enjoy our lives...When we and others in society have no lingering thoughts about our lives being one of lonely despair but that it is normal to do all the things that others do, we have "changed what it means to be blind". Getting "there" takes a commitment by us to keep moving in the direction of full participation in life as we choose and not by what others think we can and cannot do.  Dianne
> On Apr 30, 2013, at 4:52 PM, maryse figueroa wrote:
> 
>> Sharon excellent.  By changing our inner dialogue in a positive way, our encounters become positive
>> 
>> 
>> On Tue, Apr 30, 2013 at 2:16 PM, Sharon Luka <pilgrim5 at cox.net> wrote:
>> Changing what it means to be blind means
>> Full participation in society;
>> Utilization of alternative techniques when warranted;
>> Working daily to instill a positive spin/outlook on blindness;
>> Probably much, much more!
>> 
>> Sharon
>> 
>> 
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Home-on-the-range [mailto:home-on-the-range-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>> Behalf Of Cindy Ray
>> Sent: Tuesday, April 30, 2013 10:37 AM
>> To: NFB of Kansas Internet Mailing List
>> Subject: [Home-on-the-range] Changing what it means
>> 
>> An interesting discussion has come up on the Presidents' List. What does it
>> mean to change what it means to be blind? What does it mean to each of you?
>> 
>> Cindy Lou Ray
>> 
>> 
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