[humanser] A not so good experience

Cari Kness carisuekness at gmail.com
Thu Feb 25 02:57:55 UTC 2010


Hi All,
I had an experience today that I'm really upset about. Not only am I 
upset about the experience itself, I'm upset about the way I handled 
it. I bring this up because I have no doubt that I'll have to deal 
with similar experiences in the future. I'm looking for some feedback 
of more appropriate ways of handling this and some suggestions of 
what I can do either now or in the future.
I'm a free lance peer tutor at school. I tutor elementary and 
intermediate algebra. I have a student who is returning to school and 
she happens to be in the Human Service associate degree program as I 
am. I worked with her for the second time today. My favorite spot 
happened to be taken today so my student suggested we go to the 
learning center lab. The learning center is for students who have 
learning disabilities or who are getting their High school 
equivalency. The learning center is staffed with several full time 
teachers and some student tutors who have regular shifts there. I 
know a hand full of the teachers and a few students working there and 
more who use the service. I normally don't like to work there either 
as a tutor or student being tutored because people around us may need 
it quiet for test taking and the like. Today since my student 
suggested we go there I decided to go along with it. I figured, 
"after all, what's the worst thing that can happen?" We started 
working and all was good until it was time to move on to the next 
concept in the book. She has been out sick for the last few class 
periods and has not seen this stuff yet. The way I've been working it 
is to go over the examples in the book verbally with the student. 
This way I'll know what we are doing and the student has another 
chance to go over the concepts and express what they need help doing. 
Apparently my student today didn't read completely what the book was 
saying. I'm new to this tutoring thing and I'm not a 100% math 
goddess. I'm only human. Well, because I didn't have a clear picture 
about what we were doing I followed the directions and got confused 
trying to relate back to how I learned the same stuff a year ago. My 
student called over a learning center teacher. I felt like a total 
idiot. I tried to express to this teacher that I'm a peer tutor and 
that I've been working with this student for the past hour or so. The 
student insisted on working with the teacher. I felt so belittled, 
embarrassed, horrified and invalidated. I felt like she was going to 
that teacher because I'm blind and don't know what I'm talking about. 
The teacher decided to take over for a while and after that she 
lingered. She finally went away for a while and then kept drifting 
back. I was really offended both at the student and the teacher. I 
made it clear that I didn't care for the way this session was going 
and I did everything in my power to both take back my control and not 
make a major scene. I did end up making a little scene and I never 
felt completely back in control.
I know I learned in the tutor training that the student tutor is one 
of many resources offered and that the tutor should encourage the 
students to use every resources necessary. I guess I didn't expect 
that a student would call another teacher over. It would be different 
if the teacher was the math teacher but it wasn't. I tried to back 
peddle and explain why I reacted like I did but I don't think my 
student really understood. So, I was unhappy with the way things 
unfolded and I was unhappy with the way I handled myself. I'm sure I 
made a total ass out of myself. I felt that the teacher was hanging 
around because she didn't feel that I could adequately help my 
student because I'm blind.
I'm sure this will come up again with future coworkers, clients and 
their families etc.  How do I get over the "blindness knee jerk" 
reaction? Are there specific ways I can assert myself without making 
a total ass of myself and yet get my point and position across?
Thanks for listening and in advance for any thoughts.
Peace,
Cari 





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