[il-talk] Fwd: an article that I think is totally detrimental towards blindness

Sun Mar 31 14:15:20 UTC 2013

Bob, interesting article, clearly relays graveling with the fact that she is but... ... Hey. Clearly she got a miscarriage for being rejected at job interviews on the other... She's doing what she feels she has to do to survive but she's clearly an individual who have not adjusted totally to a vision loss.

Jemal Powell sent you this voice-to-text generated email using Voice on the Go.
To listen, click on the voice message link or open the attachment.
https://vemail.whitelabelapp.net:443/enterprise/Recordings/4xVBenUl-20130331-1012.wav

> Original Message:
> ---------------------------------
> 
> From: "Robert A. Hansen" <roberthansen33 at yahoo.com> 
> Sent: March 31, 2013 8:44:39 AM
> To: il-talk at nfbnet.org
> Subject: [il-talk] Fwd: an article that I think is totally detrimental towards blindness
> 
> Comments, reactions?  The floor is open for a heated discussion.
> 
> Robert
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sent from Samsung tablet  roberthansen1970 at gmail.com
> 
> -------- Original message --------
> Subject:an article that I think is totally detrimental towards blindness
> From:"Robert A. Hansen" <roberthansen1970 at gmail.com>
> To:Robert Hansem <roberthansen33 at yahoo.com>
> Cc:
> 
> Nude Modeling: Going in Blind
> ; Fink*
> At hrst I wasn't sure about taking a nude modeling job. ! knew Mike 
> never expected me to answer the want ad. I think he'd read U to me as a 
> sort of joke, trying to lighten up the dark mood that sets in every time 
> I start looking for work.
> I was working full-time and studying for a master's degree when I lost 
> my sight. Job interviews since then have centered on Braille, tape 
> recorders, and talking computers. Employers erd up fascinated with the 
> technology, yet unsure about my capabilities.
> It's been rough to be rejected over and over again for jobs I know I am 
> more than qualified for. That's why the nude modeling idea appealed to 
> me. No need to explain technology at this interview. For once, I 
> wouldn't have to beg them to see past my blindness. Sight is unnecessary 
> when all you're doing is letting art students draw you whileyou stand on 
> a tabletop without" any clothes on.
> In fact, that's the concept I tried repeating any time ?[ felt any 
> anxiety about this job. "C'mon, Beth," I'd say to myself. "You'll just 
> be standing there naked." Too often, unfortunately. this phrase got 
> shortened to a repetitious mantra:
> "Naked."
> "Naked."
> "Naked."
> "Naked."
> "Naked."
> "Naked."
> When I was in college, I used to set rny alarm extra early in order to 
> get into the communal shower room and have it to myself. It xvas years 
> after I was married before I finally quit wearing flannel nightgowns to 
> bed. At home I stiil dress and undress behind a closed bathroom door, 
> and everi when \ve lived in a very isolated house on the outer banks of 
> North Carolina, 1 never walked around undressed;
> When I mentioned this nude modeling idea to a few
> "You'll be perfect!" they laughed. "You won't even see the students 
> staring at you. It won't bother you at all that you 're up there naked,"
> Somehow 1 disagreed. Whether I could see myself or not, I'd know my 
> clothes were off And I'd know the students would know I was naked-
> Making all this worse was the paranoia I've developed since losing my sight.
> I always think people are staring at me: If Dora, my see-ing-eye dog, 
> makes a wrong move and I have to correct her, I'm sure every eye is on 
> us. When I fumble to find a doorknob, I know everyone is watching and 
> pitying me. I hate the feeling that people are watching me without me 
> being aware of it.
> Why on earth would I accept a job that required me to be stared at?
> But then I wondered: Could it feel okay as long as I knew that watching 
> me was what. they were MipptMed to be doing? Maybe those laughing 
> friends were right. Maybe it'd be «wy to stand naked in front of people 
> now that I can't see myself anymore, can't see them looking at me? Could 
> nude modeling turn out to be yet another thing I could do as a blind 
> person that I never couid do when I could see? Was it possible that 
> someday I would find standing naked on a tabletop as easy as reading 
> Braille in an elevator? 1 had to find out.
> I grabbed Dora's harness and walked to the art and design building, 
> armed with questions about the want ad in the paper.
> What a pleasure it was to have a potential employer welcome my interest!
> "We're short on models this year," -I was told. Til help you fill out an 
> application ifyou're interested."
> The application was short, with questions about my
> weight, my height, and my skin color. Nothing was ever said. about the 
> fact that I was blind. The only bothersome" ques-
> and had to admit I'd just turned 40. The interviewer mentioned how nice 
> it would be to have a middle-aged model.
> 1 let the comment slide by. If they wanted a middle-aged model, I'd be a 
> middle-aged model.
> The audition for the job took place the next week in front of four art 
> instructors and the receptionist who had helped me fill out the 
> application. We women who had applied came to the art room with a robe m 
> our backpacks. We undressed in a separate room, put our robes on, and 
> gathered again in the art room. One by one we were asked to stand on a 
> four-foot-by-five-foot tabletop, take off our robes, and do different 
> poses. As the first woman stepped onto the tabletop, I sat quietly 
> waiting lor my turn, questioning whether I'd lowered myself to something 
> here. Or was this just another opportunity that would have never come my 
> way if I hadn't gone blind?
> I often think of my blindness this way. That is, if I hadn't lost my 
> sight, ! wouldn't have learned how lovely it is to walk arm-and-arm with 
> friends all the time, how rewarding it is not to judge folks by what 
> they look like.
> I would have never had a black Lab, and I would still be relying on 
> sheet music rather than'playing the piano by ear.
> These thoughts were interrupted when the art instructor asked who wanted 
> to be next. "Me!" I called out. I was eager to get this over with. I 
> jumped up and asked my dog to take me forward. The tabletop .was just 
> about the same height as tlie one at the vet's office. Dora decided- to 
> stay seated on the floor. I was a little disappointed, as I thought 
> having a dog up there might distract the art instructors from 
> concentrating on me.
> There was a stepstool there to help us onto the platform, but I avoided it.
> With my robe still on, I backed up to the table and
> hitched myself up instead. Crouching down, I felt the table-top's edges 
> to be sure I wouldn't fall off. Finally centering myself on the 
> tabletop, I stood up and unbuttoned my robe. I was told to strike six 
> poses, eventually ending up in a reclining position.
> If I had been able to see that first model do her audition, I might have 
> had a better idea of what was expected. I was suddenly so concerned with 
> which six different poses to take that I forgot I was naked up there. I 
> passed the audition, but not due to my grace. All I could figure was 
> that the department was pretty desperate for models. They seemed 
> particularly interested m me for my age and my willingness to work 
> mornings. Most models are students who would rather not wake up early.
> After surviving the audition, I figured I'd probably take the job and 
> see how it turned out. Modeling wouldn't start right away, so I still 
> had a few weeks to think It over. And to train Dora to jump up on a 
> tabletop.
> The sheet of rules they gave us at the audition wasn't available in 
> Braille, so one of the professors read it out loud.
> Weeks later, as I get ready at home to go to my very first modeling 
> session, I can only conjure up three things from that long list:
> 1. Do not stare at the art students as they work. For me, this will be 
> no problem;
> 2. Be on time. This could be a problem on days I have to walk to work. 
> But for today, MikeJias agreed to drive me to the studio. This, even 
> though he's still nol crazy about my standing nude on a pedestal 
> surrounded by college students; and
> 3. Be clean. Again, this shouldn't be a problem. I shower every morning, 
> modeling nude or not.
> My showers are usually quick ones, soapy hands brushing over spare fire 
> and love bandies as tasras'Tcah.'One d~T the advantages of becoming 
> blind is the inability to look in full-length mirrors. I was a slim and 
> trim 26-year-old when I lost my sight, and if I shower quickly, avoiding 
> pinching any inches along the way, I have the luxury of still picturing 
> myself looking the way I did m my 20s. And on days 1 can't completely 
> convince myself of this fantasy, I imagine that the clothes I choose do 
> wonders to hide any middle-age spread.
> But the jig's up once I take my clothes off in front of this art class 
> today. They'll notice every lump and layer of fat.
> And. this morning, in the shower, so do I. The shower ends up being a 
> long one. Exploring all those bulges takes time. So does contemplating 
> just how I'll feel with all those students scrutinizing my pear-shaped 
> body in their attempts to recreate it on paper.
> Shower finally over, I head for the coffee maker, remembering to limit 
> myself to a half-cup. Standing still and naked in front of people is 
> going to be hard enough. Standing still and naked while having to pee is 
> something nightmares are made of.
> Sucking ever)' last drop from the mug cradled in my hands, I am finally 
> able to conjure up some of the more reassuring things that were said at 
> our audition. "The art students will, think of you models the same way 
> medical students think of the naked bodies they work with," claimed one 
> professor. "It's all very professional."
> Another professor pointed out that a tot of the students would be 
> freshmen and not yet very .sure of themselves as artists. "Add to that 
> the fact that they've probably never been in a room with a naked 
> stranger before," he said, "and you'll realize they'll be a lot more 
> nervous than you'll be."
> (continued on page 10)
> 
> 
> 
> -- 
> Sent From My Lenovo b-470/570 Laptop
> 
> My email for off list and other business use is rob erthansen1970 at gmail.com
> Skype name is roberthansen33
> 
> Some websites I recommend are
> 
> www.wzrdchicago.org
> WZRD 88.3fm  Chicago's home of freeform programming
> 
> www.democracynow.org  for a truly independent voice in media
> 
> www.fsrn.org  A unique voice for news
> 
> www.dishnuts.net for some awesome freeform internet talk and music and other assorted content
> 
> www.wtnd.us
> An independent radio station WTND-LP 106.3fm in Macomb, IL
> 
> 
> www.nfb.org  The largest organization of the nation's blind
> 
> www.aa.org if you need help learning to live on life's terms
> 
> _______________________________________________
> il-talk mailing list
> il-talk at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/il-talk_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for il-talk:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/il-talk_nfbnet.org/derek2872%40yahoo.com

-------------- next part --------------
A non-text attachment was scrubbed...
Name: VoiceMessage-20130331-1013.wav
Type: audio/x-wav
Size: 320378 bytes
Desc: not available
URL: <http://nfbnet.org/pipermail/il-talk_nfbnet.org/attachments/20130331/6552be94/attachment.wav>