[il-talk] Fwd: there is a side 2

[Robert A. Hansen]

Sent from Samsung tablet  roberthansen1970 at gmail.com

-------- Original message --------
Subject:there is a side 2
From:"Robert A. Hansen" <roberthansen1970 at gmail.com>
To:Robert Hansem <roberthansen33 at yahoo.com>
Cc:

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10 • THE OCTOPUS • WWW.CUOCTOPUS.COM • FEBRUARY 18-24, 2000
Nude Modeling: Going in Blind
How about we just all get naked then, I wonder. You know, just to make 
absolutely tiure the nervous playing field is level?
I take my robe off the bathroom hook and caress it a bit before stuffing 
it into my backpack. At the audition, we were told that if we ever get 
cold or uncomfortable, we should always feel free to just put our robe 
back on, Never before have I felt so much reverence for an article of 
clothing.
We were also told at the audition that the art department would provide 
sheets for us to lie on. "These sheets get dirty sometimes," one of them 
said. I pictured her standing in front of us, waving a bedsheet full of 
stains from models who weren't so prudent about coffee intake. "You 
might want to bring one of your own sheets from home," she advised. No 
question.
I stuff a sheet in along with the robe. While strapping the pack onto my 
back, I call Dora to come and take me out to the car.
On the drive to the art building, Mike and I talk about how it might 
feel to be in an airplane crash, about when he thinks he 11 get around 
to changing the light bulb on the front porch, about how gray Dora's hair'is
getting, about anything except nudity and art. I know that avoidance is 
not always a good coping strategy, but today it's working. I don't fight it.
By the time I call Dora out of the car and put her harness on, I'm 
feeling pretty confident. It's nice to be employed again, good to feel 
needed by someone outside of my family. I've even convinced myself that 
my work will somehow contribute to the advancement of art. Mike kisses 
me goodbye, and the squeeze he gives my hand is reassuring. I smile when 
I hear him call out a "Good luck!" to Dora and me as we scoot off to the 
art building.
We're right on time, but the professor isn't. As I wait outside the 
studio door I'hear students hurrying by to class. "Can I see your still 
life?" one asks. "I'm not sure I did it right." I wonder what "right" 
is, and if someday in the future two students will be comparing their 
renditions of my naked body, seeing if they got it "right" or'not. Then 
I hear two other students discussing their social lives.
"Hey, like, did you party, like, all week-end?"
"No, just, like, Saturday. But, like, I tayed up, like, way late last 
night, too. Like, , 1 almost didn't, like, wake up this morning."
When ail you can do, like, is hear ... I mean, when you can't, like, 
distract yourself with, like, visual things around you, well, like, the 
overuse, like, of the word "like," tike this, like, can drive you, like, 
crazy.
My brow furrows in annoyance and disgust over this modern-age speech 
pattern, and when a voice calls out my name, I'm a bit startled. "Beth?" 
a woman asks. "I'm Barbara. Can I help you into the studio?"
Barbara is the art professor I've been assigned to today, With little 
time to think, I grab her elbow and let her lead-Dora and me into a big, 
open room.
"Ah, they've cleaned the room!" Barbara complains as we enter. The 
disappointment ;n her voice makes me laugh.
"What's wrong with a clean room?" I ask her.
"Oh, it just means the stools and chairs are all up on the tables, and 
we've got to move stuff around before we get started." She leads Dora 
and me to a stool, instructing me to sit down as they rearrange the room 
a bit.
I wish she would just bring i)^JE|f the changing room right away so I 
could undress and get into my robe. I've managed to get myself to a 
pretty good place about this whole nude-modeling thing, and if we could 
keep things moving, I won't have time to think about love handles. And 
goose bumps. And having to pee.
The sounds of tables and chairs being shoved around finally stops. 
Barbara approaches us-again.
Have they come up with a word that combines disappointment and relief? 
You know, like "infotainment" or "frappuccino," those other combination 
words that are so popular now? .
Disaplief? Relappointment?
That's the word I need to use to describe my reaction after Barbara 
tells me how pleased she is that I could make it this morning. She is 
particularly pleased with the opportunity that my bringing Dora along 
gives the students.
"They can draw both of you," she notes. "And since you'll be there with 
the dog," Barbara reasons, "we'll have you keep your dress on."

-- 
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