[nabs-l] Come to you or go to it

Fri Feb 20 04:25:43 UTC 2009

I guess sometimes it is hard to balance the academic part with the life 
skills. I feel that I was very fortunate that this was not too much of a 
problem for me as the life skills training was done outside of school hours, 
but still in my school district.
As far as independence goes, I was the one who finally said in eighth grade, 
"okay, enough, I can get from class to class on my own." However, there was 
still one class that I always got assistance going to and from because there 
was a dangerous hill.  One of my sighted friends had broken her elbow 
falling on that hill, and everyone agreed that that was not what we wanted 
for me.
As far as doing things on my own, I do as much as I can. I get help in the 
cafeteria, though, because things are not in the best places for me to get 
me myself, and it's sometimes hard to carry a tray and use a guide dog. Any 
suggestions for this one?
As far as people asking if I need or helping too much, well... If it's 
someone that I probably will not see again and I don't really have time to 
explain, I just grin and bear it. Not sure why people think that they have 
to get a paper towel for me instead of showing me where the dispenser is. 
However, if it is someone who helps me often, I try to explain what I can do 
on my own.

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "priscilla" <priscillagarces1987 at hotmail.com>
To: <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, February 19, 2009 6:16 PM
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Come to you or go to it

hi all listers,
I think that this topic was very interesting.
I mostly went to public school since pre-school up to the 12th grade.
initially when my parents just arrived from Ecuador into the united states,
they were very confused at first in terms of which school I was supposed to
go to.
When I was around 2 years old, I went to a special center where people with
different disabilities such as cerebral palsy among other things went to be
taught different skills.
Mom did not want that kind of school for me so I went to a public school
ever since and I did quite well.
There I learned Braille since the age of 3 with a vision teacher who was the
most patient and nicest person in the world, mom even says that I have her
smile and attitude.
she helped me learn how to be patient and confident since I was little.
Although I did fine in public school, I did suffer discrimination from some
teachers, but the kids seemed more compassionate accept for the usual
teasing that they always do as young teenagers.
I had mobility every week since I was in pre-school with a good instructor
until I moved out of Newark when I started high school. When I was in
grammar school I had an aid since 5th trade until the eighth grade, but she
was a very discouraging person because she said "I don't think you will be
able to make it to college because you can't do anything on your own. You
have to be used to walking along with someone talking to you when they are
trying to tell you directions instead of being held, there will be no aid in
high school, I don't think you will make it that far." To my grammar school
aid, hello, I made it far, very far, I am in college living on my own.
then as I was in high school, I had a discouraging mobility teacher who had
the nerve to tell mom that I never learned anything and never developed my
travel skills since the age of 7.
in other words, she thought I was stuck at the level of travel skills of a
seven year old which to me is just pure nonsense from her part.
Mom finally told her off and whenever she came home to practice mobility
lessons, she would say I am doing fine just to make mom feel better and stay
on terms with her.
Oh, I forgot to tell you that I had an aid all through high school and she
was not the usual person who would help you do everything.
Like anyone, she helped me during my first and part of my second year of
high school and said, when you go to college, there will be no aid so we
better start this when you are young.
Thanks to her, I learned the basic skills needed for college.
I remember when I was a senior in high school, she would work at the
principle office and help with other duties while I was in class as well as
brail handouts that my teacher would provide for me to read.
She gradually weaned herself as the years of high school went by from the
first day she came where she helped me do everything until my senior year
where she was not there at all except brailing my handouts.
Then as I came to college, I got back to my old mobility instructor who says
that I always find a different route to get to places, and that I am
improving a lot.
but one thing I notice a lot is that every time I go out to class or lunch,
people come by and ask me if I need assistance even though I know where the
class is.
I learned to teach myself how to get from one place to another sometimes,
thanks to the living on campus in a dormitory experience.
I think that living away from home as well as trial and error is the best
way to learn rather than those training programs.
This is just my personal view only because the last time I went to the wings
program, I did not really get much out of it and was often having a hard
time getting along with some of the people there.
But the good program that helped me at least get the most basic things is
the drew program which was a pretty good training program.
For example when I am at the cafeteria, I always go to lunch with this nice
lady who also has a son with cerebral palsy.
She used to help me a lot during the first year of living on campus which
was my sophomore year in college because she figured that I was new to the
cafeteria.
I remember her saying "you think I am going to spread the icing on the cake
for you? uh uh uh no no no, I want you to do this yourself."
So when she grabbed me a chocolate cupcake, she gave me a plastic spatula
and she taught me how to spread the icing on it.
She also says "I can carry the tray since it is to big for your small hands,
but you are going to get your own drink ok you need to learn this so when
you graduate you know and remember how to do that.
I like her the most because she is a person who understands what it is to
encourage someone with a disability to live a normal and independent life
and I thank her a million times for that.

She taught me how to scoop ice cream and put the hot fudge on it and said
"you are doing this on your own, but I will still be there.
so, these are all of my experiences that I have acquired, what do you all
think?

Sorry if this is way to long, but I couldn't miss a bit of information.

If I were to go back, I would start the living away from home process since
day 1 of my freshman year, only because I could get a lot more out of  it
rather than starting it  later.

Thank you very much.

Priscilla

Ps. Nobody, not even my school counselor as well as most of the adults in
high school as well as my eighth grade teacher  thought I was going to be
able to make it through college or high school due to the dependence they
thought I had on people and the amount of incompetence, but they are all
lightheaded due to being  shamed of themselves by me proving them totally
wrong.
I think this is interesting, what are your views?

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