[nabs-l] Help-Philosophy Question

[Jewel S.]

I currently use a support cane. My counselors and doctor have been
trying to convince me to use a wheelchair or walker, but I am really
not ready for that. I am seeing a chiropractor Monday who thinks he
can help me, and hopefully I can convince my doctor that it is a good
idea, and maybe seeing the chiropractor will keep me out of a chair. I
hope to avoid it, though I will be using a chair at Disney, where one
has to walk a LOT, and maybe around the school campus if necessary.
But at 25 years old, I am simply not ready to give up my mobility.

~Jewel

On 4/21/10, J.J. Meddaugh <jj at bestmidi.com> wrote:
> I usually end up going with the 50-50 for flying because I can usually still
> sneak it under my seat in the aisle. Given the uncomfortable nature of
> plains, I always choose aisle seats and for me, the bit of room gained by
> doing this outweighs the potential advantages of a straight cane. I did just
> recently have a flight attendant who asked me to hold the cane during
> takeoff, which I thought a bit weird considering the usual rules of keeping
> everything put away during this time, but oh well.
> All of this just to say that there is usually several different ways to do
> something, and just when you think you've heard all of them, someone will
> come along with a new and often plausible alternative.
>
> J.J.
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Arielle Silverman" <nabs.president at gmail.com>
> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, April 20, 2010 11:18 PM
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Help-Philosophy Question
>
>
>> Hi all,
>>
>> Like others I often fly with a straight cane and stow it against the
>> window, and almost always, it's no problem. I did have one stubborn
>> flight attendant who wanted to put it in a closet at the front of the
>> plane. I compromised with her and we decided to stow the cane in the
>> overhead directly above my seat. We put it up together and I made sure
>> I knew exactly where it was and that it was in reach of my seat in the
>> event that I would need it in an emergency. That's another option to
>> consider before resorting to battle. I agree that I'd never let
>> someone put my cane in a closet where I couldn't get to it, but the
>> overhead solution, while not ideal, was good enough.
>>
>> Arielle
>>
>> On 4/20/10, Mary Fernandez <trillian551 at gmail.com> wrote:
>>> Dear all,
>>> There is a very simple way to ensure you keep your cane in a plane.
>>> Book a window seat. If you book your trip online, there is usually the
>>> option of choosing your seat, and even if you don't do it then, you
>>> can change it when you are checking into your flight online. It's a
>>> simple option that everyone has. However, if you do find yourself in
>>> this situation, first of all, be aware of your surroundings. While you
>>> should have your cane at all times, and it is no difficulty to put it
>>> next to the window seat, please don't make a big scene. There are
>>> passengers behind you that want to settle down and get going on the
>>> trip. I suggest being prepared for this kind of thing, since it is
>>> fairly common. I usually tell the flight attendat, if they ask, that I
>>> will ask the passenger sitting by the window, if they would mind very
>>> much if I put my cane by them. No one to date has had a problem with
>>> that. I usually also travel with two canes, a telescopic one in my
>>> purse, and my straight cane, just in case.
>>> Someone made a comment earlier that the NFB doesn't recognize that
>>> there are different ways of doing things. Aside from the symbolic
>>> representation the straight cane has in the Federation, it is also
>>> highly practical. In travel and mobility, it is highly sensitive and
>>> pretty sturdy for the amount of feeback it gives the traveler.
>>> However, it is obvious that we recognize different people have
>>> different thoughts and needs, and of course should have different
>>> options. So, you can buy a straight cane from the independence market,
>>> as easily as you can buy a telescopic or folding cane. No one thinks
>>> less of you because you use a folding cane unless you are doing it to
>>> hide your blindness. Our philosophy is that blindness is respectable,
>>> and ifyou are making a choice because it helps you hide your blindness
>>> better, that is just demonstrating your own insecurity. We work under
>>> the very same theory, that there is more than one way to do things.
>>> That's what we call alternative methods. Learn everything you can, and
>>> then apply what works best for you. In the end all that matters is
>>> self-acceptance, competency and never being ashamed of your blindness.
>>> Sincerely,
>>> Mary
>>>
>>> On 4/20/10, Jedi <loneblindjedi at samobile.net> wrote:
>>>> Jewel,
>>>>
>>>> Just curious: have you given much thought to using a wheelchair or even
>>>> a support cane with the white cane?
>>>>
>>>> Respectfully,
>>>> Jedi
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> Original message:
>>>>> I have two cents to add to the thoughts about conforming and such...
>>>>
>>>>> I often worry about taking help that is offered because I'm blind, but
>>>>> that I need because of another disability. For example, I don't need a
>>>>> sighted guide to keep up with a nurse at the doctor's office or follow
>>>>> a campus tour, but I often take the assistance of a friend to walk
>>>>> because of my balance problems. Walking on a friend's arm (or my
>>>>> boyfriend's, usually) allows me to keep my balance better, and if I
>>>>> *do* lose my balance, s/he can catch me. I make sure to still use my
>>>>> cane and make it obvious that he is *not* leading me, and sometimes we
>>>>> make a point for him to take my arm and me lead him (he has more
>>>>> vision) with the cane, because him holding my arm, while not as good
>>>>> as me holding his, still helps my balance, as he can catch me if I
>>>>> stumble, and I can lean on him as needed. But I do worry that people
>>>>> will see me getting assistance from my boyfriend or someone else (or
>>>>> accepting a stranger's arm if I'm alone) and think that I can't walk
>>>>> on my own because I'm blind and/or that all blind people need to be
>>>>> walked on the person's arm. I also hold a person's arm different than
>>>>> I would a sighted guide, with my hand around their elbow, because that
>>>>> is more sturdy, and I worry that peple will think that everyone does
>>>>> it that way, and not know how to do sighted guide right. I also do
>>>>> walking behind the person different, holding their arm more than I
>>>>> would a sighted guide, but it means that they are not doing their arm
>>>>> the right way for sighted guide, because I keep my cane out to look
>>>>> for obstacles.
>>>>
>>>>> Another worry I have is that people will take my use of a folding cane
>>>>> as a sign that I am against straight canes. I'm not. I have a straight
>>>>> cane, in fact, that I use on the days when I know I will not have to
>>>>> worry about losing my balance. I *am* against telescopic canes,
>>>>> because they just suck, and always get stuck, but that's just personal
>>>>> preference. But I use a folding cane much of the time. The reason I do
>>>>> is that I use an aluminum folding cane. Aluminum is stronger than
>>>>> graphite or fibreglass, so if I am walking alone and lose my balance
>>>>> and fall forward on my white cane, my aluminum cane will not break
>>>>> under me and send me to the ground. However, I have had a fibreglass
>>>>> straight cane break under my weight when I stumbled and it sent me
>>>>> sprawling on my hands and knees. Luckily, all I got was scraps on my
>>>>> hands and kness and a big bone bruise on one knee, but I would not
>>>>> want to re-experience that, especially as a fibreglass shard could end
>>>>> up in my hand or leg. I plan on getting a guide dog within the year,
>>>>> but in the meantime, I use an aluminum folding cane or a strong
>>>>> graphite cane.
>>>>
>>>>> The last concern I have is that because it is so hard for me to walk a
>>>>> lot or even stand for long, I take advantage of people's offers to get
>>>>> things for me, seat me first, and sit up close. I take advantage of
>>>>> these accommodations for my mobility issues, not for my blindness, but
>>>>> I worry that people will assume that because I need the assistance,
>>>>> all blind ppeople need it, because you know how they tend to assume
>>>>> that we're all alike *eyeroll*
>>>>
>>>>> I know that my blindness is only a physical nuisance. It does not
>>>>> limit me anymore (it did when I first went blind, but I have learned
>>>>> much since then). But I have other limitations that keep me from doing
>>>>> things. As that disability is an invisible one and the blindness is
>>>>> obvious, people often assume that I am slow, clumsy, awkward, and need
>>>>> assistance because I am blind. I try to explain when I have the time,
>>>>> but I don't always have the time.
>>>>
>>>>> Does anyone have suggestions on how I can show people that blindness
>>>>> is not limiting me and help them understand that blindness is not
>>>>> limiting if you have the training and tools, but that my other
>>>>> disability does limit me, but not necessarily others? I have done a
>>>>> few things, such as cooking homemade candies to bring to my support
>>>>> group for adult survivors of childhood abuse, to show them what I
>>>>> *can* do because  they were treating me like I would break. One guy
>>>>> asked who made them, and when I said I did, he said "But aren't you
>>>>> blind? How do you cook?" And I told him that "it's easy; I listen for
>>>>> the boiling and roll the candy in the sugar with my fingers. It
>>>>> doesn't take sight to cook. I cook without looking." And I think I
>>>>> gained a bit of respect from the group that way. But I stil l need
>>>>> someone's help to get to a chair (not to find it, but to walk there),
>>>>> and I still don't get up during break to get a snack because it hurts
>>>>> to walk a lot after sitting for awhile, so I ask a friend in the group
>>>>> to grab an extra snack for me.
>>>>
>>>>> My two cents,
>>>>> Jewel
>>>>
>>>>> On 4/20/10, Darian Smith <dsmithnfb at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>> Hello all,
>>>>>>   My feeling on the matter is that we can generally do better by
>>>>>> handeling things in a less confrentational manner when possible.
>>>>>> While  this is easier said than done,  I think it's worth taking  a
>>>>>> second (if possible depending on the situation)  and  try to  look at
>>>>>> what you need or  would like to get out of the situation you are in.
>>>>>>   I find it difficult to balance the  short-term solution and
>>>>>> long-term results of that  dicision made (example:if someone takes
>>>>>> one's cane on an airplane or  even in a differennt situation such as
>>>>>> somebody insisting  in helping  you across the street).
>>>>>>  Sometimes i have to ask myself, when do I make a dicision for the
>>>>>> good of other blind people, or for my  own good? Should I  take my
>>>>>> long cane  because  it somehow  better models  my comfort in blindness
>>>>>> to other people?    or should I take a telescoping cane because it's
>>>>>> easier to carry  and it  still conforms to  what is  an NFB cane?  Or,
>>>>>> do I use a folding cane because I'm feeling like it's  less likely  to
>>>>>> get broken of someone steps on it while  traveling?   The question
>>>>>> that I think is worth asking is- is there a "model positive image of
>>>>>> blindness"?  In much the same way that people tend to  look for the
>>>>>> ideal image of  gender or ethnicity, is there such an Ideal  for the
>>>>>> blind?
>>>>>>    if so, is that what we all  must conform to?   or is there a such a
>>>>>> thing as conformity in the blind community and in this case, the
>>>>>> Federation community/family?
>>>>>>   Best,
>>>>>>   Darian
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>> On 4/20/10, Briley Pollard <brileyp at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>>> Good morning,
>>>>
>>>>>>> I wasn't there, so I can't speak to how your friend handled the
>>>>>>> situation.
>>>>>>> The fact of the matter is though that allowing airline personel to
>>>>>>> take
>>>>>>> our
>>>>>>> mobility aids awe frm us is, A, illegal, and B, degrading. It also
>>>>>>> sets
>>>>>>> a
>>>>>>> bad precedent for blind people that may be traveling with them in the
>>>>>>> future. That said, it is of course better to use a calm professional
>>>>>>> tone
>>>>>>> when dealing with this kind of situation. There is a quiet way to
>>>>>>> insist
>>>>>>> that our rights as blind people be respected. Also explaining the
>>>>>>> why's
>>>>>>> of
>>>>>>> a
>>>>>>> certain ideal often help. This wasn't a situation where your friend
>>>>>>> should've just "let it go" for the sake of peace, but perhaps she
>>>>>>> could've
>>>>>>> handled it in a calmer way.
>>>>
>>>>>>> The Throw the Nickel principal applies more to accepting help I think
>>>>>>> than
>>>>>>> having our rights ignored. In that situation, it was better to accept
>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>> kindness of a stranger than to make a fuss. This has to do with the
>>>>>>> airplane
>>>>>>> rights of a lot of people, and while we should always be calm and
>>>>>>> professional, but sometimes confrontation is required to bring about
>>>>>>> change.
>>>>
>>>>>>> Just my 10 cents.
>>>>
>>>>>>> BrileyOn Apr 19, 2010, at 10:34 PM, Candice Chapman wrote:
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>>>> Dear NABS members,
>>>>
>>>>>>>> I recentally was in a situation where my NFB philosophy was put to
>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>> test. I was travelling with a friend who is totally blind by
>>>>>>>> airplane
>>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>>> we got into a confrontational situation with the flight attendant.
>>>>>>>> She
>>>>>>>> insisted upon taking my friend's straight cane, but didn't have a
>>>>>>>> problem
>>>>>>>> with mine since it was teloscopic. Perhaps she assumed that storing
>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>> straight cane would be a hazard. My friend proceeded to have a loud,
>>>>>>>> obnoxious verbal confrontation, that resulted in hold up of traffic
>>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>>> embarrassment on my part. Eventually the conflict, due to time
>>>>>>>> constraint,
>>>>>>>> my friend was finally mollified and allowed to keep her cane.
>>>>>>>> However
>>>>>>>> I
>>>>>>>> can't help but wonder if there was a more diplomatic way to handle
>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>> situation. It brings to mind an article by Dr. Kenneth Jernigan,
>>>>>>>> perhaps
>>>>>>>> you guys know it, it's in The Master, The Mission, The Movement. The
>>>>>>>> article is titled, "Don't Throw the Nickel."
>>>>
>>>>>>>> How do you think the confrontation could have been handled more
>>>>>>>> delicately? In the above article Dr.Jernigan referenced many
>>>>>>>> situations
>>>>>>>> in
>>>>>>>> which you could choose your battle. Perhaps it's true that you can
>>>>>>>> make
>>>>>>>> a
>>>>>>>> situation worse by escalating a said situation with a sighted
>>>>>>>> person,
>>>>>>>> rather than taking the high road. What are your thoughts on the art
>>>>>>>> of
>>>>>>>> negotiationg NFB philosophy? What might you suggest as potential
>>>>>>>> alternatives to the above confrontation? I would like to hear all of
>>>>>>>> your
>>>>>>>> thoughts on the importance of our philosophy in the lives of blind
>>>>>>>> people.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>>>> Best,
>>>>>>>> Candice Chapman
>>>>
>>>>>>>> P.S. The Article is attached for your convience.
>>>>>>>> _________________________________________________________________
>>>>>>>> The New Busy is not the old busy. Search, chat and e-mail from your
>>>>>>>> inbox.
>>>>>>>> http://www.windowslive.com/campaign/thenewbusy?ocid=PID28326::T:WLMTAGL:ON:WL:en-US:WM_HMP:042010_3<Don't
>>>>>>>> Throw The Nickel.doc>_______________________________________________
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>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>> --
>>>>>> Darian Smith
>>>>>> Skype: The_Blind_Truth
>>>>>> Windows Live: Lightningrod2010 at live.com
>>>>>> The National Federation of the Blind has launched a nationwide teacher
>>>>>> recruitment campaign to help attract energetic and passionate
>>>>>> individuals into the field of blindness education, and we need your
>>>>>> help!   To Get Involved  go to:
>>>>>> www.TeachBlindStudents.org
>>>>
>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>
>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>
>>>> --
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>>>>
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>>>
>>>
>>> --
>>> Mary Fernandez
>>> Emory University 2012
>>> P.O. Box 123056
>>> Atlanta Ga.
>>> 30322
>>> Phone: 732-857-7004
>>> In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that
>>> greatness is never a given. It must be earned.
>>> President Barack Obama
>>>
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>>
>>
>> --
>> Arielle Silverman
>> President, National Association of Blind Students
>> Phone:  602-502-2255
>> Email:
>> nabs.president at gmail.com
>> Website:
>> www.nabslink.org
>>
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