[nabs-l] Making Friends/Socializing With Sighted People

Joshua Lester jlester8462 at students.pccua.edu
Sat Mar 26 21:57:18 UTC 2011


Kerri, I don't know what to do in your situation. I have some of the
same problems at my community college. I'll say hi to somebody, but
they won't respond. I do have a question, though. I know it's off
topic, but how do you access Facebook? Every time I try to create a
page, the computer shuts down. Please help me offline.
Thanks, Joshua

On 3/26/11, Kerri Kosten <kerrik2006 at gmail.com> wrote:
> Hi All!
>
> I thought I'd bring this topic up because I'm interested in hearing
> opinions and a lot of people have commented when I mentioned this on
> Facebook.
>
> As I've posted here before, my father owned a popular bar/restaurant
> that I like to go to on the weekends.
>
> I am noticing that quite often people will come up to where I am
> sitting, say hi, have a quick conversation with me, and than say
> "Well, I'm going to go join my other friends. Nice seeing you," or
> something like that.
>
> I have tried to not let it bother me, just ignore it, cheerfully say
> goodbye and go on but it's starting to really bother me. Last night I
> saw two girls that live in the same apartment complex as I do, and one
> of them works at the radio station with me.
>
> I use my cane all the time when I'm in Crockett's, to get everywhere.
> I never ask to take someone's arm, and even when I go outside to catch
> my cab to get home I go out by myself. I never ask people for rides,
> always paying for cabs to and from to independently get there and
> back. I always wear glasses to make my eyes look less funky (one is a
> lot tinier than the other), I always make sure my hair is brushed
> back, and it is always clean. I usually wear jeans but last night I
> was wearing a pair of corduroy pants and a nice shirt with a sweater
> vest over it that I know looks nice because it was the outfit I wore
> for Christmas. I usually do not wear makeup but put lipstick on last
> night.
>
>
> I discussed this situation earlier with a good friend who is also
> totally blind and she said people do the same sort of thing to her in
> the dining hall at the college she attends.
>
> Do many of you get similar treatment by sighted people?
>
> In your opinion, what is the best way to react/handle it? Is it rude
> to ask the person if you can join their group or should you always
> wait until you are invited?
>
> How do you deal with this and not let it affect/bother you or put you
> in a negative mood/frame of mind?
>
> The hardest thing for me is when people come up and talk to me and
> then they don't invite me to join in and I am left sitting alone it
> really upsets me and makes me think negatively. I was told that at
> least people do come up and talk to me;they could just walk past and
> not say a word. Sometimes though, in a way I think that would make
> things easier because then I would have never known they were there in
> the first place. I was also told to just cheerfully go on as if
> nothing happened and try to not let it bother me, and to think of
> myself as number one.
>
> Just something I thought I'd bring up for discussion. I understand all
> anyone can give is their opinion.
>
> Kerri
>
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