[nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others

Debbie Wunder debbiewunder at earthlink.net
Sun May 29 15:54:58 UTC 2011


A good thing to read would be Marching Alone, Walking Together
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Josh Gregory" <joshkart12 at gmail.com>
To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list" 
<nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Saturday, May 28, 2011 12:07 PM
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others


> Is there a site with...  the history of blind people and what they went 
> through? I'm curious now, this is a good thread.
> Josh
>
> sent from my Apex
> Email: joshkart12 at gmail.com
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Mike Freeman" <k7uij at panix.com
> To: "'National Association of Blind Students mailing list'" 
> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org
> Date sent: Sat, 28 May 2011 09:52:47 -0700
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others
>
> Although I was never subject to one, I can still remember when, at late as
> the 1960's, welfare workers conducted "night raids" with the help of the
> police wherein said workers would visit blind clients and go through their
> homes to make sure that nothing had been bought that would indicate that 
> the
> clients had unreported income.  This extended even to such items as a new
> dress.
>
> I echo Briley's sentiments that many today have no concept of what went 
> down
> in the past.
>
> Mike
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On 
> Behalf
> Of Briley Pollard
> Sent: Saturday, May 28, 2011 7:28 AM
> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others
>
> I think it is not always an appropriate comparison to say our struggle for
> civil rights isn't completely parallel with the black American experience,
> but we have struggled for civil rights.  Go read some history on how blind
> people have been treated by families and institutions over the years. 
> Blind
> children were targets for sexual assault in extremely high numbers because
> they were considered to be vulnerable.  They were placed in horrific 
> living
> conditions throughout history in institutions because families believed 
> that
> blindness was equal to ineffectiveness, and that they'd never be able to
> succeed or help out their relatives.  As a people group, we have suffered
> many indignities that I don't think the current generation of blind people
> even come close to realizing.
>
> Best,
> Briley
> On May 28, 2011, at 1:23 AM, Darian Smith wrote:
>
> Mike:
> African-Americans/blacks (however one choosses to term
> themselves)would not have been too keen on the idea based upon how
> they were treated by whites  up to that time.
>  It is curious that how    african-americans were treated is always
> one of the first ways we as blind  people choose to make our
> comparisons in our struggle  for first-class citizanship.  I wonder,
> were blind people  beatin and hosed down when they peacefully protest
> the unjust ways they were treated? Were  they lybnched?  Can we safely
> make those  comparisons?  unless  I am missing something (I could be,
> and it wouldn't be the first or last time I have), we  have some
> similarities with regards to civil rights, but largely our histories
> were quite different and  the scars, deaths,risks were felt on largely
> different levels.
> Just  some thoughts on  the matter,and I very much appreciate the
> question.
>  Respectfully,
>  Darian
>
> On 5/26/11, Mike Freeman <k7uij at panix.com> wrote:
> Darian:
>
> What do  you think African-americans would have said during the
> 1950's and 1960's had one of their number said he/she would rather
> date a Caucasian person because of the concern for two black persons
> dating?
>
> Mike
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Darian Smith
> Sent: Thursday, May 26, 2011 5:49 PM
> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others
>
> Jedi,
>  Sure-let me see...
> We as federationests have certain ways that we like to deal with
> situations, ways that we see life or phrase things in life.  For
> example We like to use  the term "blind"  as opposed to "visually
> impaired" or any variant there of.  We also like if a person uses
> products with Braille  on them (braille watches, braille compass,
> braille books and the like, but somehow we tend to make people who
> don't utilize these things seem lesser for not.
>  I have a friend who would much rather date a sighted  gentleman than
> a blind gentleman because she is concerned about the idea of two
> blind people dating.
>  Personally I may feel a certain way about  these things, but I would
> like to think that  it's  huge to  consider where each person is in
> their life and  accept them into the  fold as they are.    I am fine
> with educatinn,  so long as  we arn't critical and that we are
> accepting, because  seems to me that weas people hate to be told that we
> are "wrong"
> for thinking like we do.
>  Does that make sense?
>  Respecgfully,
>  Darian
>
>
> On 5/26/11, Darian Smith <dsmithnfb at gmail.com> wrote:
> Very good points.
>  We as blind people are a minority, and I think it's  good to
> remember that  there are other minorities out there.  How does one
> member of a minority group address another member of that same group
> if they don't feel that this person is acting like they should in
> public?  Don't feel like this person is projecting a positive image
> of the rest of that group to society?
>    I believe that we all face that problem and how we deal with it
> varies, but I would hope that we know enough to not  take  it   upon
> ourselves to change the worlds opinions.  I think we can model  that
> positive image that is with in our grasp to become, that probably is
> the  healthiest way to approach this  idea of perception-changing
> that we  think about alot,  Does that make sense?
>  thoughts?
>
> On 5/26/11, Jedi <loneblindjedi at samobile.net> wrote:
> Excellent points.
>
> I'm going to add to that some.
>
> I've noticed that we also tend to judge a person's actions when
> they attempt to handle a vexing situation like overhelpfulness or
> discrimination.  I've been doing some research on the effects of
> such judgment and have concluded that it creates an invisible
> audience for the blind person in question.  This audience is made of
> both the blind and the sighted community and creates thoughts like
> "What will my blind friends and colleagues think of me if I react this
> or that way?
> What will the sighted person I'm talking to think? What will
> sighted bystanders think?" What this does is create a win/lose
> situation where the stakes are high.  Aside from causing stress that
> limits problem-solving ability, this high stakes situation also
> creates a greater likelihood of negative response to perceived
> threats to the blind person's self-concept and sense of efficacy in the
> interaction.
> So for example, an overly helpful person might cause a blind person
> to feel ineffective as it is.  But the invisible audience concept
> boosts that feeling considerably because of the stress involved
> with feeling like they have to show themselves as both effective
> and graceful in handling both the offers of help and the person
> who's offering it.  Is any of this making sense? So the bottom line
> is that by trying to be the perfect ambassador for the blind, we
> may be shooting ourselves in the foot by creating such a high
> stakes situation in our mind that the stress lowers our ability to
> present the cool, calm, and effective image we want to offer to the
> public.
>
> On that note, I've noticed that our community seems to have it in
> our heads that we're responsible for how the sighted feel about us.
> The truth is that there are limits to that responsibility.  Sure, we
> want to set a good impression in all areas, but so does everyone
> else.  The sad truth is that we are judged based on the actions of one
> person.
> But the thing is, there's nothing that we can really do about that
> except to expose a given sighted person to the diversity of our
> population.  Even if we set the perfect impression, it's likely that
> the sighted person will still stereotype by saying that we're all
> amazing or that the one individual in question is the exception to
> a rule.  It seems to me that the only people who really get that
> we're as diverse as they are are those who know how to deconstruct
> society's grand narrative or are those who have seen enough
> diversity in our population to realize that they can't judge all of
> us based on one
> person.
>
> Respectfully,
> Jedi
>
> Original message:
> That makes perfect sense, but we should not fall into the trap of
> taking responsibility for others' actions.  When we do that, we
> lose sight of our own goals and direction in life.  Unless you're a
> therapist, or a rehab teacher working with people like that, it is
> not your job to fix them.  Even as a therapist or teacher, your
> place is to be a mentor and an instructor.  As I previously said,
> if that person, after being shown compassion and alternative ways
> of thinking, doing and living chooses to fall back into old
> patterns as soon as the instructor's back is turned, that shows a
> lack of respect for everyone around them, including themselves.  So
> if a person wants to wallow in misery and self-pity, let them!
> That person will either fall hard when they find out their
> parents/family members/significant other or what have you can't
> take care of them forever, and then they'll realize what needs to
> happen in due time, or they will get sick of the status quo and
> want to change it.  And if people hold it against a decent blind
> person because they've met a person like that in the past, it's
> not worth it to try and make them feel any differently.  They will
> either come around in time or they
> won't.  Choice is the key word here.
> Everyone is free to think as they choose so long as it's not
> hurting anyone.  So, while it might temporarily sting a bit to lose
> out on a potential friendship due to someone's ignorance, as soon
> as you meet someone who's worth your time, you forget about that
> other person real quick
>
> On 5/26/11, Daniel Romero <djdan567 at gmail.com> wrote:
> I think the reason why this might go down is because of the view
> that we get from the public in general.  Most people who are
> sighted are not used to a blind person.  You have to understand
> that one blind person being seen is a huge thing.  They're now
> reliable for what a person thinks about blind people.  They are
> the ones setting an example.  So if you have a blind person who
> smells bad, rocks, pokes their eyes or just do not have the
> proper skills, the outside person will make an assumtion and say
> that all blind people are like that.  i'm not saying it's right
> for blind people to call out other blind people with a skills set
> that is lower then theirs, they're just calling them out because
> they are representing blind people.  It puts a bad label on us
> blind people who do take care of ourselves, have the skills to be
> independent and succeed.  like i said, i'm not saying it's right
> but I don't think us who do have the skills want to have a
> negative conotation.  Not all blind people poke their eyes, rock,
> hop, twitch,bump into everything, smell bad, do not clean their
> own clothes, or anything like that.  So to be part of a group
> that's going to display such a view that is negative to the public,
> we fall right behind that.  Am I making sense?
>
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> Darian Smith
> Skype: The_Blind_Truth
> Windows Live: Lightningrod2010 at live.com Follow me on twitter:
> http://twitter.com/goldengateace
>
> "The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
>
> - Robert Byrne
>
>
>
> --
> Darian Smith
> Skype: The_Blind_Truth
> Windows Live: Lightningrod2010 at live.com Follow me on twitter:
> http://twitter.com/goldengateace
>
> "The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
>
> - Robert Byrne
>
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> Skype: The_Blind_Truth
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> http://twitter.com/goldengateace
>
> "The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
>
> - Robert Byrne
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