[nabs-l] Grabbing and streetcrossing help

[Ashley Bramlett]

Arielle,
OOh, that is scary! A guy grabbed you in the gym as you
were putting on a coat! Well,
I have the opposite experience. People often walk by me and I cannot get 
their attention. I might be looking for an empty locker while other ladies 
go to theirs and go about their business of  putting stuff in or getting it 
out.
So I find an  empty one and use it and go on to workout.
If  I need help, I approach someone and ask.

If people interact, they do so in a polite way and often its general 
conversation, not related to helping or not. Its just talk like they would 
approach any other member.
Like we might talk about spin class or the latest class the gym offers. Its 
unfortunate I find most classes too visual to follow. I wouldn't know the 
moves and what they're doing. I have some basic moves with dumb bels and 
body bars and just using my body, but I certainly couldn't do everything in 
a class. I wish I could as its so fun though.

Ashley

-----Original Message----- 
From: Arielle Silverman
Sent: Thursday, November 10, 2011 11:49 AM
To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Grabbing and streetcrossing help

Good point Bridgit. How do people think we got to the street corner in
the first place?
It also amazes me how people try to "help" me with things like putting
on my backpack or coat, and I wonder how they think I put it on the
last time I did? Do they think someone dresses me?
I was at the gym a couple weeks ago and I put my coat in a cubby
during my workout. I was halfway through putting my coat back on when
I heard some guy come up behind me breathing hard (probably from
exercising) and without any verbal warning, I felt him tug on the side
of my coat that wasn't yet on my body. Creepy! I asked him what he was
doing and he said, "can I help you put this on?" I told him I didn't
like him grabbing my coat without any warning and suggested he ask
before offering that kind of assistance. He apologized and, again,
seemed surprised that he had done anything wrong or inappropriate.
Arielle

On 11/10/11, Bridgit Pollpeter <bpollpeter at hotmail.com> wrote:
> I can kind of understand how those with little to no exposure to
> blindness may be concerned and curious as to how we do something like
> cross a street, but, and this may be my naivety talking, when a person
> sees a grown person walking about on their own, does common sense not
> dictate that perhaps, while not fully understanding it, that person is
> probably okay? Maybe they can ask if we need anything, but it's a little
> difficult for me to understand how we can obviously be doing things with
> no help, but when a sighted person is around we suddenly need their
> help? I guess I'm still acclimating to stuff like this.
>
> In crowded situations, I'll take sighted guide sometimes, more so, so I
> don't lose whoever I'm with, but I think it helps when we do as much as
> possible independently. I also suffer episodes of extremely low blood
> pressure which makes me dizzy, weak and can affect my balance. On days
> like these, depending on what I need to do, I may take more assistance
> than on good days, but I try to be as independent as possible even on
> these days, but this also is just because of my personality as much as
> it is related to blindness! Smile. While going to school, classmates
> became accustomed to me doing things and getting around without help,
> and I led the way when it came to when and if I needed assistance. When
> classmates would see me around campus, they eventually stopped asking if
> I needed help and would just approach me like they would anyone else.
> They let me do the asking, and instead, we were able to cultivate
> relationships.
>
> The positive energy and confidence we put off helps as much as our
> actions. If we present ourselves in as confident of a manner as possible
> in any given situation, people will pick up on this and respect us as
> people. The more we work on our confidence, the more people will take
> note, and more importantly, the better off we feel about our
> independence and capabilities.
>
> Sincerely,
> Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter
> Read my blog at:
> http://blogs.livewellnebraska.com/author/bpollpeter/
>
> "History is not what happened; history is what was written down."
> The Expected One- Kathleen McGowan
>
> Message: 21
> Date: Tue, 8 Nov 2011 23:10:14 -0500
> From: Patrick Molloy <ptrck.molloy at gmail.com>
> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Grabbing etc.
> Message-ID:
>
> <CAN+-G_CeC3zdSdX+TEE1od6936YObAZRvSXG9KXQg2eKU2Ba+g at mail.gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1
>
> I find it quite ironic that, in trying to help us, sighted people
> often cause more of a problem with regard to street crossing. Again,
> they really do mean well, but their method of help still leaves a lot
> to be desired (if desired at all.)
> Patrick
>
>
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