[nabs-l] Sex Education Curriculum

Fri Jul 13 11:53:53 UTC 2012

Hi,
What is the link to the servey?
Thanks
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Cynthia Bennett" <clb5590 at gmail.com>
To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list" 
<nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, July 12, 2012 4:50 PM
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Sex Education Curriculum


> Just a quick note about the survey. I was super discouraged, because
> my computer didn't ask me and restarted after updates after I had
> spent a significant amount of time on it. But after a while I resolved
> that I still wanted to fill it out. And, I don't know if surveymonkey
> just recognized my computer or what, but it routed me to the question
> I had last answered. So, if something happens while you are filling it
> out, try again. You may not have to start over.
>
> Cindy
>
> On 7/12/12, Brandon Keith Biggs <brandonkeithbiggs at gmail.com> wrote:
>> Josh, frankly that's very dangerous and I'm scared for you. Not knowing 
>> what
>>
>> the stuff I described below feels like is analogous to not knowing what 
>> it
>> is in the first place.
>> I do agree that sex ed is totally inadequate for the school system and 
>> I'm
>> sorry if someone disagrees with me, but I think that if someone believes 
>> sex
>>
>> should not be taught as extensively as math, they are refusing to be 
>> human.
>> We are animals and our goal in life is to grow up, have sex, make babies,
>> rays those babies and die.
>> What separates us from our cats and dogs is the fact that we can learn
>> skills in order to make our 3 stages more enjoyable. It's a crime to say 
>> we
>>
>> should be abstinent and it's going against everything we are. We are one
>> third sexual beings and today we just ignore that one third of ourselves.
>> I once read a book by Margret Weis that talked about a group of people 
>> who
>> celebrated their bodies, loved pleasure and they even used condoms as
>> ornaments on their Christmas trees. These people were the most happy of
>> everyone in the book and the particular character was the smartest in the
>> book.
>> It's my opinion that there should be a new section that goes along with
>> reading writing and arithmetic that is romance. With divorce raits being
>> around 50% I think that's a true indication that we've got a problem. One
>> can say learning about sex is gross, it's something that should be 
>> avoided
>> and at all costs it should not be promoted among our kids! But the 
>> numbers
>> are out and glairing:
>> "The marriage breakup rate in America for first marriage is 41% to 50%; 
>> the
>>
>> rate after second marriage is from 60% to 67% and the rate in America for
>> 3rd marriage are from 73% to 74%."
>> http://www.divorcestatistics.info/divorce-statistics-and-divorce-rate-in-the-usa.html
>> If that's not a problem, I don't know what is.
>>
>> Sophie, what if you were a gay child who was blind? How would you 
>> understand
>>
>> how to express yourself? How would you be able to find people who 
>> understood
>>
>> you if you didn't know what to look for? Especially if goodness forbid 
>> you
>> were put into a conservative household?
>> I shutter to think how horrible that would be.
>>
>> A couple kissing in front of you may be gross, touching a panes with 
>> hurpies
>>
>> may be gross, seeing a gay couple in skirts may be gross, but it's
>> important!
>> It's part of growing up and it's something that will leave a child
>> developmentally delayed if not addressed.
>>
>> My mom has been good and tells me about the couple making out in front of
>> their apartment building and how passionate they are:
>> "His right hand is around her back and his left hand is under her hair
>> cupping her head. They are so close together that there is no room 
>> between
>> them. Her hands are on his shoulders and they are so in love that they 
>> come
>>
>> up for air and have to go back in for more. When one try's to go, they 
>> get
>> pulled back into the other's embrace for one more kiss and that kiss 
>> turns
>> into a lot more than that one kiss. Now the guy has his hands around her
>> back and he's stroking her back while they're kissing..."
>>
>> It's really important to know details like that, his hand is between her
>> hair and neck, what pose they are in, how they are holding each other, 
>> how
>> they are acting, so we can copy in our relationships. We are blind and 
>> don't
>>
>> know any of that stuff. How are we supposed to know what a good bye kiss
>> looks like? How are we supposed to know how far to go when we're on the 
>> bus?
>>
>> How are we supposed to know how far we're to go in the movie theater? At
>> some point it becomes a matter of legality and we are blissfully unaware.
>>
>> If sex is put into biology it's reduced to a robotic function:
>> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=joIYo0g7HUw
>> Sex is definitely not robotic! (I wouldn't want to make sex to a 
>> robot...)
>> It's emotional and so much more than just a biological function. That is
>> what makes us different than our dog or rabbet.
>> This is why I believe sex and romance should be put into a totally 
>> different
>>
>> class of their own.
>>
>> What I think the blind class should focus on is more hands on mottles, 
>> but
>> most importantly, how to read and give queues and expressions that 
>> signify
>> sexual interest.
>> How do you flirt? I've yet herd a good answer from a blind person on that
>> question.
>> How do I get a date for the prom? This is a question I've heard way too 
>> many
>>
>> times from different blind teens in high school.
>> How do I ask a person out? Goodness knows this haunted my middle school
>> years.
>> How do I tell a woman she's beautiful through my face? Any blind guys 
>> want
>> to take this one?
>> How do I know she's flirting with me? This could be important sometime...
>> How do I have a chance with a girl who's playing hard to get? I can't 
>> even
>> find her!
>> What kind of touching is permitted when and where? You didn't tell me 
>> that
>> spot was private...!
>>
>> These are the problems that plague the blind community and they are what 
>> I
>> think the curriculum should focus on, above and beyond the sex/romance
>> class.
>> Thanks,
>>
>> Brandon Keith Biggs
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Desiree Oudinot
>> Sent: Thursday, July 12, 2012 1:34 PM
>> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Sex Education Curriculum
>>
>> Hi,
>> Brandon, I couldn't agree more with your post. Very well said. but I
>> have to say that it's not just blind people who aren't taught these
>> things. While sighted people may be more exposed to sex from watching
>> people make out or get physical, and this could even include their
>> parents, sex ed curriculums in general aren't exactly top notch. Most
>> are abstinence only, with a distinct slant towards the doom and gloom
>> side of things. It makes everything risque for kids who are saying,
>> "what's the big deal?" And honestly, if they take the right
>> precautions, they may be right. Have any of you ever checked out
>> avert.org? It's an Aids charity which has a wealth of information
>> directed at teens. There are stories about teens' first sexual
>> experiences. While some do indeed end in heartbreak or STD's, there
>> are plenty of others who attest to the fact that, while relationships
>> don't have to last forever, teens can be content with their sexuality,
>> their choices and their feelings. There are people who have sex at a
>> young age who don't regret it, who don't live in crappy apartments
>> with rats crawling up the walls while they prostitute themselves to
>> support the baby they made at 14. So, in high school and younger, lots
>> of misinformation flies from one inexperienced ear to another, and
>> that's how people not only face consequences when they experiment, but
>> also harbor guilt and shame when they feel they have no one they can
>> turn to. Their friends may have steered them in the wrong direction
>> with outright lies, however well-intentioned they may have been, and
>> parents are often so uncomfortable with seeing their children as
>> sexual beings that they never do much besides mumble something about
>> the birds and the bees, and then, in a much more emphatic voice, say,
>> JUST DON'T DO IT! Well, we all know how well that kind of thing works
>> most of the time! And the schools are basically doing the same thing
>> by teaching abstinence only, when you think about it.
>> Now, how does blindness factor into this? Truthfully, in an
>> educational sense, it doesn't, in my opinion. Blind people are
>> experiencing the same feelings and desires as sighted people. They
>> talk to their friends, whether they're blind or sighted, about these
>> topics just as sighted people talk to other sighted people about them.
>> Blind people watch movies where sex and masturbation are discussed or
>> acted out, and with described movies, while the describer isn't going
>> to go into explicit detail, they will say something about the activity
>> being discussed. Let's also not forget that partially sighted people
>> are probably going to pick up a Playboy or watch porn at some point.
>> There's still the same danger of misinformation, and the same parental
>> reluctance to discuss these topics. the only slight difference may be
>> that parents may balk more at the idea of their blind child having sex
>> than they would at their sighted child doing the same thing. I speak
>> from personal experience on this one--my parents used to tell me I
>> shouldn't have sex because I was blind, not so much because of the
>> physical act but because of the fact I could get pregnant, and God
>> forbid a blind person should become a parent.
>> In summation, I don't think a separate curriculum needs to be written
>> up for blind people about this sensitive subject. For one thing,
>> blindness doesn't mean you have to do things differently, and I feel
>> that the blind are already singled out enough that trying to alter the
>> sex ed curriculum for us would just lead to even more awkwardness and
>> embarrassment. Sex ed curriculums need to become more inclusive in
>> general, and the teachers who teach them need to make an effort not to
>> let their personal feelings and biases get in the way. If a teacher
>> can't do that, perhaps they shouldn't be handling the material. If
>> psychologists and others in the helping profession must remain
>> objective about their clients and work, so too should teachers. It's
>> sex ed itself that needs an overhaul, not nit picking at something
>> that's way far from the root of the problem.
>>
>> On 7/12/12, Joshua Lester <jlester8462 at students.pccua.edu> wrote:
>>> Brandon, the stuff you mentioned, is something that I'm glad that I 
>>> don't
>>> see.
>>> JMHO!
>>> Blessings, Joshua
>>>
>>> On 7/12/12, Brandon Keith Biggs <brandonkeithbiggs at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>> Hello,
>>>> Sighted people are exposed to sex all the time, haven't you heard of
>>>> playboy
>>>>
>>>> or penthouse? Also, what about those people making out on the bus? Or
>>>> the
>>>> gay couple walking down the sidewalk in skirts and bikini? All that we
>>>> miss
>>>>
>>>> because we're blind.
>>>> Books are grate, but you can only learn so much from a manual. Sighted
>>>> kids
>>>>
>>>> get pictures, we should get to feel. Also, how is a blind person
>>>> supposed
>>>> to
>>>>
>>>> know they have an STD if they have never felt one? How do they know 
>>>> it's
>>>> not
>>>>
>>>> just a cut or dehydration?
>>>> Sighted people are given extensive viewings of the peaness and vagina 
>>>> in
>>>> class or in pictures, why can't blind people get the same?
>>>> Frankly I believe that the art of giving pleasure has become such a
>>>> suppressed skill that people have even resorted to substance abuse to
>>>> obtain
>>>>
>>>> pleasure. Our bodies were meant to give us pleasure, why aren't we
>>>> taught
>>>> to
>>>>
>>>> utilize these pleasure factories? What's the meaning of life? To love
>>>> and
>>>> be
>>>>
>>>> happy! Why aren't we taught to be happy, to give pleasure, to love our
>>>> selves in school?
>>>> It's a fundamental wrong that I find is a crime against the words human
>>>> beings, but that's kind of a different issue.
>>>> But if this curriculum is any bit good, teachers will adopt it instead
>>>> of
>>>> the droll thing they have now.
>>>>
>>>> btw what about feeling a condom, diaphragm or dental dam? How is a 
>>>> blind
>>>> person supposed to know what one looks like if they haven't felt one or
>>>> tried it on? Also, how does a blind person shop for contraception's?
>>>> Me: "Next on my list is condoms." Walgreens guy: "OK, what brand do you
>>>> want? Durex, Trojan, Crown, Kimono..." Me: "Uh, what's your favorite?"
>>>> Walgreens guy: "Most people get Trojan, what size do you want? We've 
>>>> got
>>>> small, medium, large and extra large. We've also got narrow and wide.
>>>> Here
>>>> are some flavors as well..."
>>>>
>>>> That's just a wall greens guy who is comfortable, what if it's one of
>>>> the
>>>> really shy ladies who doesn't speak English? Sighted people can be
>>>> unobtrusive and just buy the condom or diaphragm along with their lube
>>>> where
>>>>
>>>> as a blind person has to know what questions to ask and know what 
>>>> brands
>>>> to
>>>>
>>>> get. I learned what questions to ask when shopping by watching my
>>>> parents,
>>>> but I've never seen my parents buy condoms.
>>>> It's a serious issue and this program will help address those problems.
>>>> And
>>>>
>>>> what about masturbation? I've rarely read a book where masturbation is
>>>> talked about and I've read a lot of books! How does a guy masturbate
>>>> without
>>>>
>>>> making a mess?
>>>> Sex Ed is not just about a sperm and an egg get together to form a 
>>>> baby,
>>>> that's more science.
>>>> Sex Ed is about sex and it's an issue that blind people fall way short
>>>> in
>>>> when it comes to being educated along with their fellow students.
>>>> Thanks,
>>>>
>>>> Brandon Keith Biggs
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: Herrin, Amber R.
>>>> Sent: Thursday, July 12, 2012 6:40 AM
>>>> To: 'National Association of Blind Students mailing list'
>>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Sex Education Curriculum
>>>>
>>>> Dear Joshua,
>>>>
>>>> I have to agree with you here!  For me, the idea of knowing about sex,
>>>> before I'm sharing it with my husband, is kind of...unnecessary, I
>>>> guess?
>>>> Maybe the wrong answer, and I understand that not everyone believes you
>>>> should wait until marriage as I do, but I think that being blind 
>>>> doesn't
>>>> prevent us from finding out about it the same way sighted people
>>>> do-experiment (isn't that what most people do anyway?) or read books
>>>> written
>>>> on the topic (how confusing can text be?)
>>>>
>>>> Amber R. Herrin
>>>> Assistive Technology Trainer in Training: 2012
>>>> Mobile: (513) 593-5855
>>>> E-mail: herrinar at muohio.edu
>>>> "It doesn't matter what you've heard
>>>> Impossible is not a word
>>>> It's just a reason
>>>> For someone not to try
>>>>
>>>> Everybody's scared to death
>>>> When they decide to take that step
>>>> Out on the water
>>>> It'll be alright
>>>>
>>>> Life is so much more
>>>> Than what your eyes are seeing
>>>> You will find your way
>>>> If you keep believing"
>>>> -Kutless "What Faith Can Do"
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>> Behalf
>>>> Of Joshua Lester
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, July 11, 2012 9:35 PM
>>>> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
>>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Sex Education Curriculum
>>>>
>>>> I personally did fine, in those courses, in school, without the new
>>>> proposed
>>>> curriculum, that they're wanting.
>>>> I don't see the need for one, because who really wants to know, what's
>>>> being
>>>> shown, in those slides?
>>>> Good grief!
>>>> Blessings, Joshua
>>>>
>>>> On 7/11/12, David Andrews <dandrews at visi.com> wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>>I have been asked to circulate the following:
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> Dave
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>Dear NFB Member,
>>>>>>The National Federation of the Blind has been gracious enough to help
>>>>>>us with a current project.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>We are currently seeking your opinion in a survey that will help us
>>>>>>write a curriculum for students with low vision and blindness in the
>>>>>>area of sex education.  Currently no curriculum exists for students
>>>>>>with low vision and blindness that reflect current education
>>>>>>standards.  Young people, educators, and professionals have all
>>>>>>indicated that there is a desperate need for such a curriculum.
>>>>>>We want your voice to impact our work!
>>>>>>Please take the time to fill out the survey at the link found below:
>>>>>><https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/sexeducationsurvey>https://www.surveym
>>>>>>onkey.com/s/sexeducationsurvey
>>>>>>
>>>>>><https://maverick.hec.ohio-state.edu/exchweb/bin/redir.asp?URL=https:/
>>>>>>/www.surveymonkey.com/s/sexeducationsurvey>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>Thank you for your time and consideration of this project!
>>>>>>Tiffany Wild, Mollie Blackburn, Stacy Kelly, and Caitlin Ryan
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>Thank you,
>>>>>>Mika Baugh
>>>>>>National Federation of the Blind
>>>>>>200 East Wells Street
>>>>>>      at Jernigan Place
>>>>>>Baltimore, MD 21230
>>>>>>P: (410) 659 9314 ext. 2371
>>>>>>E: <mailto:mbaugh at nfb.org>mbaugh at nfb.org
>>>>>>W: <http://www.nfb.org>www.nfb.org
>>>>>>
>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>> ents.pccua.edu
>>>>>
>>>>
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>>>>
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>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
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>>>
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>>
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>
>
> -- 
> Cynthia Bennett
> B.A. Psychology, UNC Wilmington
>
> clb5590 at gmail.com
> 828.989.5383
>
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