[nabs-l] condoms and Sexual Health

Brandon Keith Biggs brandonkeithbiggs at gmail.com
Tue Sep 11 04:15:16 UTC 2012


Hello,
We aren't promoting sex among students, we are promoting safe sex. There is 
a huge difference. If the student division is the only one with some 
practical sense about sexual activities, I'm a little scared... :)
I do agree though, sex, dating and excepted socializing among a sighted 
community is a very big topic that is often times ignored by the blind 
community.
I have been told by sighted TVIs that many blind folks (youth or not) have 
some very strange mannerisms and beliefs that are totally against the grain 
of sighted society. My mom in particular, who is a TVI, has suggested that 
the NFB should really give some instruction on how the sighted world thinks. 
Otherwise what will happen (and what has happened) is the world looks at a 
gathering of blind people and cringes because they are so weird. or a 
sighted girl sees a blind guy and thinks she wants to talk to him and when 
she is about to sit down and say hi, the guy does something really weird and 
she turns around and walks a mile away.
This is a little different than the deal with the condoms, but both sexual 
health and social issues are topics that are very much in need of attention 
among blind individuals, and students in particular.
I feel strongly that having some active workshops on this that aren't meant 
to be uncomfortable, but still deal with the taboo problems would greatly 
improve convention.
Thank you,

Brandon Keith Biggs
-----Original Message----- 
From: Arielle Silverman
Sent: Monday, September 10, 2012 8:18 PM
To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] condoms and Sexual Health

Hi all,
I have joked in the past about how NABS should sell Brailled Whozit
condoms at convention! Kidding aside, though, there are probably some
NFB leaders with more conservative leanings, who might feel that NABS
selling condoms at convention would be promoting sexual activity among
young or unmarried blind students. I don't agree with that position,
but some people do and since anything NABS does is, by extension, an
NFB-sanctioned event, we would need to balance the benefits of
providing condoms against possibly upsetting the NFB leadership or
bringing on an unwanted political debate.
I would be more likely to support a NABS breakout session, at
Washington Seminar or elsewhere, about sexuality in general, and
perhaps include an opportunity to try putting a condom on the
proverbial banana or some such. When I was 15, I went to a diversity
camp (for sighted teens) and there was a sexuality workshop available
as one of several choices. They passed around condoms and in fact,
this was the first time I actually felt one. A general workshop about
sex, dating and etiquette, etc. might be worth having.
Arielle

On 9/10/12, Brandon Keith Biggs <brandonkeithbiggs at gmail.com> wrote:
> Hello,
> This would be an awesome idea! Not only because many people have never 
> seen
>
> a condom, so they could finger the packages with labels without having to 
> be
>
> embarrassed, but when I was at the hotel I didn't run into any condoms in
> the store. Granted I wasn't looking for them, but I was browsing... 
> Condoms,
>
> lube and Dental Dams, all labeled in Braille! We would also probably need 
> to
>
> provide guides for people on how to find the right way to put on a condom 
> or
>
> use a dental dam.
> Another thing I didn't see at the NABS table is hot serial. The packing
> guide in the nabs newsletter  said to pack a ton of things and I for one
> don't keep hot serial in the house and I don't shop at places that sell 
> hot
>
> serial, so wasn't able to grab a box. But I would have loved to buy a box
> for even $10 or more, the breakfasts there were $10 alone... (Then of 
> course
>
> we could sell bole and spoon packs for the poor folks who didn't bring 
> their
>
> own utensil's).
> Thanks,
>
> Brandon Keith Biggs
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Anmol Bhatia
> Sent: Monday, September 10, 2012 8:28 AM
> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] condoms and Sexual Health
>
>
> You would be a good place to sell and buy condoms? At the NFB 
> convention...
>
> Perhaps Nabs should sell condoms at the NABS table. We can even braille 
> them
>
> so the perso can know what kind of condoms they have. lol
>
> Anmol
>
> I seldom think about my limitations, and they never make me sad. Perhaps
> there is just a touch of yearning at times; but it is vague, like a breeze
> among flowers.
> Hellen Keller
>
>
> --- On Sun, 9/9/12, Carly Mihalakis <carlymih at comcast.net> wrote:
>
>> From: Carly Mihalakis <carlymih at comcast.net>
>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] condoms and Sexual Health
>> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>, "National Association of Blind Students mailing 
>> list"
>>
>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
>> Date: Sunday, September 9, 2012, 10:54 PM
>> Hi, Brandon,
>>
>> I went into a place in Denver to  buy a dildo yes, on
>> the bigger, ribbed side to use in the old fashioned bath tub
>> I had at the time, to get myself off with the faucet.
>> Traditionally, I need something in my ass, to cum. If I
>> remember, the folks in their wer very cool, look at the
>> blind girl going to by herself a dildo! Don't worry! If
>> you're relaxed, and cool about what you're doing so will be
>> the bookstore, personnel. Let us know how goes it,
>> okay?  At 04:52 PM 9/8/2012, SA Mobile wrote:
>> > Those are the best places to get stuff as the staff are
>> professional and are trained to make customers feel at ease.
>> Just make sure the shop is of good repute.
>> >
>> > Respectfully,
>> > Jedi
>> >
>> > Sent from my iPhone
>> >
>> > On 08/09/2012, at 12:36 PM, "Brandon Keith Biggs"
>> <brandonkeithbiggs at gmail.com>
>> wrote:
>> >
>> > > Hello,
>> > > Thank goodness my father was a nurse and when I
>> turned 18, he said addio to being in with me at the doctor.
>> I do find it amusing though that some doctors are actually
>> really uncomfortable touching me because I'm blind... That
>> only happened after my dad started leaving the room.
>> > > Thank you Arielle for those websites. I don't feel
>> that condoms are something I want to buy from a website I've
>> never heard of before unless someone I know has gotten or
>> knows that site is trust worthy.
>> > > I was told that flavored condoms were only to be
>> used in oral intercourse. The same is not for lube I
>> presume?
>> > > Also, has anyone ever gone into a sex store? How
>> was it as a blind shopper? Even from sighted people I hear
>> the experience is often not pleasant.
>> > > Thanks,
>> > >
>> > > Brandon Keith Biggs
>> > > -----Original Message----- From: Arielle
>> Silverman
>> > > Sent: Saturday, September 08, 2012 10:00 AM
>> > > To: nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>> > > Subject: [nabs-l] condoms and Sexual Health
>> > >
>> > > Hi all,
>> > > I know the recent discussions about sex and dating
>> are kind of in a
>> > > gray area as to whether or not they're on-topic
>> for this list, since
>> > > most of the issues Koby brought up are not really
>> unique to blindness.
>> > > So if the moderators or Dave feel this is getting
>> too far afield, I
>> > > will happily respect your judgment. However, I
>> also think that
>> > > Brandon's question about where to get condoms is a
>> legitimate one and
>> > > that there might be other blind people out here,
>> including teenagers,
>> > > who have similar concerns about how to get
>> condoms, birth control or
>> > > sexual health information without a lot of
>> awkwardness or
>> > > embarrassment. It can be particularly difficult if
>> you have to depend
>> > > on someone else (especially parents) for
>> transportation which can make
>> > > going to a clinic or drugstore difficult.
>> > > There are a few places to buy condoms online,
>> including
>> > > www.condomania.com
>> > > www.undercovercondoms.com
>> > > and
>> > > www.condomdepot.com
>> > > Believe it or not, they also have some condom
>> choices at
>> > > www.amazon.com
>> > > If you go to your health center on campus for any
>> reason, it shouldn't
>> > > be a problem  to ask a doctor or nurse there
>> about condoms.
>> > > I cannot answer the questions about when to begin
>> having sex with a
>> > > partner because that is a highly individual
>> decision. However, I feel
>> > > it important that anyone who is considering having
>> sex for the first
>> > > time ensure you understand what all of your
>> options are for preventing
>> > > pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, the
>> advantages and
>> > > disadvantages of each option, and the proper way
>> to use condoms  and
>> > > birth control. There are  a couple different
>> websites with this kind
>> > > of information:
>> > > www.plannedparenthood.org
>> > > (includes live chat with a sexual health educator)
>> or
>> > > www.scarleteen.com
>> > > This issue is particularly close to my heart at
>> the moment because my
>> > > boyfriend's sister just had an unintended
>> pregnancy at a very
>> > > inopportune time (while still in college, with a
>> guy she had only
>> > > known for a few months) and was apparently taking
>> birth control pills,
>> > > but had not been taking them consistently. While I
>> don't believe that
>> > > sex  should be feared, it is something that
>> takes some responsibility,
>> > > planning and foresight to ensure it is enjoyable
>> while minimizing the
>> > > risks. Also, while I won't go into details here,
>> there are other ways
>> > > to be physically intimate with someone that are
>> less risky, which
>> > > these online forums will talk about.
>> > > I also want to bring up  an issue that is
>> somewhat relevant to sexual
>> > > health, which I experienced and I think that some
>> of you might also be
>> > > struggling with. This is the issue of having your
>> parents drive you to
>> > > doctors' appointments and then having them want to
>> sit in or even
>> > > participate in your appointments. Since I attended
>> college in my home
>> > > city, my mother always wanted to drive me to my
>> doctors' appointments
>> > > and would then want to come in and chat with the
>> doctor while he/she
>> > > was examining me. This was partly because my
>> parents and I saw many of
>> > > the same doctors and she often thought it was a
>> good opportunity to
>> > > ask the doctor a quick question about her own
>> health while she was
>> > > there, or because she was curious to see what the
>> doctor recommended
>> > > to me about a particular issue. I eventually
>> realized that while it
>> > > wasn't ill-intentioned, it was a violation of my
>> privacy as an adult
>> > > patient and I asked her to wait in the waiting
>> room while I was seeing
>> > > the doctor. I didn't actually take this stand
>> until I was 21 and in
>> > > hindsight I wish I had done  it much earlier.
>> By the time you are 18,
>> > > unless you have a serious cognitive disability,
>> you have a right to
>> > > privacy of your medical information and it is
>> important to establish a
>> > > good doctor-patient relationship without a third
>> person interfering.
>> > > This is especially true when it comes to sexual
>> health and by the time
>> > > you are 18 or even 16, you will want to start
>> discussing your sexual
>> > > activities or questions with your doctors without
>> your parents being
>> > > around. You might also want to consider getting a
>> driver or even
>> > > taking the bus to medical appointments to avoid
>> this problem.
>> > > On a related note, by the time you are in high
>> school, you should know
>> > > the names of all medications you take on  a
>> regular basis and any
>> > > chronic medical conditions you may have. If you
>> ever have to go to the
>> > > emergency room, this kind  of information may
>> be requested of you.
>> > > Best,
>> > > Arielle
>> > >
>> > > _______________________________________________
>> > > nabs-l mailing list
>> > > nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>> > > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nabs-l_nfbnet.org
>> > > To unsubscribe, change your list options or get
>> your account info for nabs-l:
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>>
>> > >
>> > > _______________________________________________
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