[nabs-l] Wanted to share my experience living at Friedman Place, a supportive living community for blind adults in Chicago

Wed Apr 10 21:54:05 UTC 2013

HiKatie, 
,  
 Thanks so  much for your response! I felt so much more accepted here having
heard all this from  you, and it means a lot! 
 I'm hoping  that if more  and more people develop a similar  attitude the
blindness community can come together a little more by fighting for common
goals of the group and appreciating each member's contributions even
ifpersonal views on things  like independence  vary. 
 I also wanted to say you're a good writer, and I'd love to connect with you
personally more on music therapy as I studied that some in college. 
 Thanks. 
 Sam 

-----Original Message-----
From: nabs-l [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Kaiti Shelton
Sent: Wednesday, April 10, 2013 1:31 PM
To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Wanted to share my experience living at Friedman
Place, a supportive living community for blind adults in Chicago

Hi all,

Robert brings up a great point.

Personally, I do align pretty closely with the NFB philosophy.  I do my own
laundry, clean and maintain my living spaces, and am learning more and more
recipes so I can independently cook.  I find enjoyment in doing these things
both because things like cooking are fun and there is a sense of pride in
keeping things clean for me, but also because I can do them myself and don't
have to rely upon or wait for others to help me do them.  However, that was
just how I was raised along with my sighted siblings.  I wasn't taught that
things like doing your own laundry were signs of super-independence, just a
part of life that most people have to do on a weekly basis or so.  Same for
cooking or at least finding a way to independently feed yourself like if it
involves independent travel to somewhere to order it.  They're just things
most people in general do and that's how I was taught.

However, I recognize that other people may have different needs separate
from the visual.  I also see independence in the way that Robert does; it's
not defined by how much you can do on your own for every single person.  It
might be more that way than not for me, but just because that's how I was
taught it doesn't make others who don't fall into that belief system or less
independent than I am because they're independent in the sense that they're
choosing what they want to do and how they want to live their lives.  Robert
is also right that the NFB philosophy is not set on measuring each person's
independence quotient or something in terms of a number or percent, but we
are about changing conceptions of the blind and making life better for blind
people, and in order to do this there is strength in numbers.  So, is it
right to ostricize or exclude people from that effort just because they
might not do as much for themselves as others?  Is what we do or don't do
for ourselves individually more important than the common goal we are trying
to achieve?  I know that even if I had a friend who barely did anything for
themself, but supported other blind people in terms of independence in the
work place, or accessibility in college classrooms, I would accept that help
gladly.  And, to me a person like that who is willing to fight or support
independence related to things they themselves may not ever want or need to
do on their own is just as supportive and important to the causes we fight
for.  Not to mention that supporting things others  might want to do, even
if it doesn't apply to them, speaks volumes about their character.

On 4/10/13, wmodnl wmodnl <wmodnl at hotmail.com> wrote:
> I love youre response.  Keep up the hard work.  That is what we all 
> need, perseverance.  Let's connect, I am working with a group of 
> people to start a group.  One that is a cross of both NFB, ACB, and 
> some own Independant-thinking behind what and how we should become 
> more united within the blindness community, not divided.  Have a good day.
>
>
> Sent from my iPad
>
> On Apr 9, 2013, at 9:11 PM, "Robert William Kingett" 
> <kingettr at gmail.com>
> wrote:
>
>> I too am a member of Friedman place and a competent member of the 
>> blindness community, even if I have someone cook for me. I've raised 
>> money to donate to the NFB and ACB to help their cause, even 
>> supporting my fellow peers with advocacy related matters. I believe 
>> that Friedman place is just the right fit for me. What I don't agree 
>> with is the notion that people, and yes, I've looked at the archives, 
>> have tried to make others do what they deem as independent. I have to ask
this very simple question.
>> What is independence anyway? I believe independence is freedom, 
>> individuality, liberation. I believe that it is freedom from 
>> dependence on or control by another person, organization, or state.
>> I'm both a member of the NFB and ACB, and I have been nominated to be 
>> president of the LGBT chapter in the ACB, even though I live in a 
>> place that fosters stereotypes and makes people think blind people 
>> can't take care of themselves, apparently. Independence, as stated above,
is very different for people.
>> Someone who's independent is free, and that, I believe, should be 
>> celebrated and applauded. Since a lot of people have said that the 
>> NFB is the optimal way to live I don't understand something. This is 
>> my understanding of the NFB, and correct me if I'm wrong. The mission 
>> of the National Federation of the Blind is to achieve widespread 
>> emotional acceptance and intellectual understanding that the real 
>> problem of blindness is not the loss of eyesight but the 
>> misconceptions and lack of information which exist. We do this by 
>> bringing blind people together to share successes, to support each 
>> other in times of failure, and to create imaginative solutions.
>> Acceptance is a key part of showing sighted people, and people who 
>> have stereotypical perceptions that the NFB are a powerful 
>> organization and not just an organization to adopt a one size fits 
>> all policy. Instead, as I have said before and state again, 
>> independence should be celebrated. We're paying our bills and we're 
>> paying for our food. When we rise in the morning to brighten up the 
>> world we choose, with care, the clothes we wear even if we have help 
>> with washing them. No one dictates my path and I have achieved my 
>> level of independence that I'm very satisfied with. Ii have my own
apartment and I'm a very strong advocate for both the LGBT community and the
blindness community as well.
>> When I hear that someone is living on their own and paying their own 
>> bills, even if they have someone cook for them. There independent and 
>> it makes me happy. Why? Because that's a blind person that has broken 
>> down the stereotype of living at home with their parents all of their 
>> lives, and I celebrate that with congratulatory words all the way.
>> They're an independent person, living how they want to live. It sure does
feel good.
>> As I have said, that's something to be celebrated because, they're 
>> changing what it means to be blind, those beautifully independent people.
>>
>>
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--
Kaiti

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