[nabs-l] When NFB philosophy doesn't seem to work... advice?

[Bobbi Pompey]

I would suggest calling her house and speaking with her parents. Or having her phone number blocked. 

Bobbi A. L. Pompey
(336) 988-6375
pompey2010 at yahoo.com 
http://pompey2050.wix.com/bobbi-pompey

> On Dec 27, 2013, at 5:29 PM, Kaiti Shelton <crazy4clarinet104 at gmail.com> wrote:
> 
> Hi all,
> 
> I have quite the puzzling situation on my hands, and I am not quite
> sure how to handle it.  Thoughts?
> 
> Almost four years ago my mom and I went to this 3 day seminar for
> students in the state voc rehab program with visual impairments.  This
> Friday evening to Sunday morning seminar was designed to show students
> and parents from around the state different employment options that
> were available, ranging from vending and call center jobs to taking
> the college route to get a degree in a two or four year program.  A
> friend of mine and I, who lived close to each other, were hanging out
> early on.   All of a sudden, this other girl was hanging all over him
> and would not give him his personal space.  It was very odd,
> considering that this was a very short period of time in which this
> all happened.  Less than 24 hours after the students had met, my
> friend was so creeped out by the almost constant and unwanted
> attention that he began to avoid this girl.  Other students, seeing
> how creeped out he was and some creeped out themselves due to the same
> thing, ended up following suit.
> 
> I was sixteen at the time, and could feel for my friend.  The girl was
> very much in my face a lot of the time too, but I was a bit more
> patient with her throughout the weekend.  She seemed to be worse with
> the guys than the girls too, so I had a little more space than my
> friend.
> 
> About 3 months after the program in the summertime, she started
> calling my house.  The parents at the program were given a list of the
> other parents who attended, along with their phone numbers, so they
> could swap resources if they so chose.  This girl got the list from
> her parents, and was using it to call me and my friend, possibly other
> students as well although I am not sure.  The calls started off being
> about once every so often, then increased.  She was a very odd girl,
> and liked to complain and cry about her problems to me and my friend.
> There was nothing social about the calls, just complaining and
> negativity, and mumbling which was really weird.  He quit talking to
> her much sooner than I did because I tried to get her to see that
> being visually impaired, (she didn't like the word blind since she was
> a large print reader, and kind of used that to elivate herself above
> other people), was not the worst thing in the world.  She would cry
> and complain, and even tell me I didn't understand how bad things
> were, when her descriptions of things made it sound like she was very
> overdramatic.  I decided at the end of my junior year, a year after
> the calls started coming, that I didn't want to talk to a downer, and
> that I wasn't going to be able to convince her that blindness didn't
> mean the end of the world.
> 
> The girl continued to call.  My senior year was very busy with
> activities and preparing for college.  I would come home from marching
> band practices to find my siblings quite frustrated because the girl
> had kept calling, sometimes as much as 5 or 6 times in a span of a few
> hours.  They didn't want to answer the phone because whenever someone
> told her I wasn't home she would instantly get teary and mumble things
> to herself, and it was very weird, but they didn't want her to
> continue calling either.  I remember one night over Christmas break of
> that year, she called and when I told her I was getting ready to leave
> the house, which I was to go pick up someone coming in from out of
> town for the holidays with my family, she got angry and wanted me to
> give her my cell phone number.  I told her that I didn't want to give
> it out, and she started to get upset.  Then I really had to go, and
> there was the characteristic mumbling.
> 
> My parents have told me that for the past year and a half that I've
> been in college that the girl has continued to call.  My mom has told
> her that I live at school and do not come home much multiple times.
> My younger siblings, in frustration, have told her that I've moved
> away and have begun making up different things to tell her to try to
> discourage her from calling.  She continues to call, and around
> Christmas it is always terrible.  A few nights ago she called when my
> parents were asleep a little after  11:00 at night, and has apparently
> called and left messages late at night before.  My parents have to get
> up very early for work, so In order to stop the ringing and to prevent
> a message from playing over the machine I had to answer.  Everything
> was exactly the same.  I was heading to bed myself, so I told her that
> I was asleep when she asked for me.  The fact that she had called at
> such a late hour didn't seem to phase her, there was just the mumbling
> and usual stuff coming over the line.
> 
> I don't quite know what to do.  I've tried to be positive with her and
> that hasn't worked.  My family has told her that I no longer live at
> home and am away at school among other things in frustration, but
> nothing seems to phase her.  I know she still calls my friend's house
> as well, even though he does not live at home any more either.  I
> don't quite know what to do about this.  I barely know her and she
> barely knows me, and in spite of this I have tried to help her with no
> success.  My parents and siblings have said that we should just block
> her calls, but I have hesitated in doing this while I was in high
> school because I didn't want to be mean, and then I honestly forgot
> about her for the most part while I was at school last year and last
> semester because I can't get calls from her there.  After the call a
> few nights ago, I don't really know what to think.  I am slightly
> creeped out that even after my parents have told her I am not home for
> the past year and a half that the calls are still coming.  What do you
> think I should do?
> 
>  --
> Kaiti
> 
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