[nabs-l] Success and Why I Left the NFB
Jedi Moerke
loneblindjedi at samobile.net
Thu Apr 3 02:32:50 UTC 2014
Oh my goodness! I have so many thoughts in my mind and have no idea where to start!
I don't want to get into the details here, but I can honestly say that I have had my experience of disillusionment with the organization. I can say that I felt an outsider, judged, not welcome, isolated, and like I had nothing to contribute that anyone wants in this organization. In short, I felt completely worthless and that I didn't belong. Were there some people and experiences in the organization that helped me to feel this way? Yes. But I also came to find that my expectations for life in the federation were also to blame.
My membership in the Nfb has radically changed my life for the better. I honestly don't think I would be the person I am without the knowledge and experience I have gained by my membership in it. Like many newcomers to organizations like the Nfb, I immediately became enamored with every aspect of the organization and initially felt that the organization and its members could not do wrong. Unfortunately, a few experiences radically shifted my opinion in the opposite direction and I felt completely disoriented. Self reflection caused me to recognize a few things that might be relevant to this discussion.
First, there is a difference between the ideals of the organization and the members of the organization. I believe the ideals of the Federation our sound. I believe that the Federation philosophy strives to support all blind people no matter the circumstance. Dr. Jernigan used to say that, in everything that matters, we are one. I really believe that is the attitude we all strive for. The reality is that we fall short sometimes for one reason or another. But that is no reason to quit. I really believe that it is better to stay and encourage members around us to strive toward our stated ideals rather than to leave with bitterness in our hearts and a bad attitude. And that is not to say that encouraging others toward our organizational ideals isn't challenging. I myself have faced that challenge and have come out better for it. To tell you the truth, I believe the membership I impacted also came out better as well. I also believe that we managed to build a stronger relationship as a result.
I also found that I had to look at the expectations I had for myself within the organization. I perceived a set of rules for perfection as a member of the organization. It took me a long time and quite a lot of personal agonizing to realize that my worth as a blind person and a member is not determined by how well I follow these rules. In fact, I decided to do away with these rules altogether. I am honestly much happier for it. In the process of my personal reflection, I learned that many other people in the organization decided to throw away whatever rules they perceived for being a perfect Nfb member. And strangely, I started to recognize overtime that there really were no rules for Nfb perfection to begin with and that it was all in our heads. Are there judgmental people in the organization? Absolutely. However, I bet that they are probably judgmental in other areas of their life as well. Not just in there Nfb membership. I say to hell with them. I can think of better things to do than worry about them. That said, I do believe that the ideas we call Nfb philosophy make some good points and recommendations for what blind people can do to better themselves. I am living proof that many of these recommendations truly do make a difference. It's up to you whether or not you are willing to assess your own life to determine what recommendations will help you improve. Everyone has room to grow, so I encourage all of you too take down whatever defenses you may have and have a listen. You never know, you might find something helpful somewhere. And the stuff that isn't helpful to you and your situation? Don't worry about it. In fact, feel free to offer your own ideas. There are those who will not listen, but there are also plenty who will. You never know, your perspective may someday be added to our common philosophy. At the very least, your willingness to speak your ideas may make room for some other member of the Federation. But that can't happen if you decide to leave.
I want to say a few words about the shift our organization seems to be undergoing. I think that Steve had a point when he said that our organization is not the same organization from the 80s and 90s. The field of blindness has changed dramatically since then. More agencies are willing to work with us and many are wanting to learn from us. We have learned a lot about our capabilities in the last 20 or 30 years. We now know that we can drive a car or practice arts in the STEM fields. Technology has changed our lives in a number of ways making some things easier and some things more difficult. Lastly, the way we advocate for ourselves has changed a great deal as well. So naturally, the way we express ourselves is going to change. But that does not mean that our mission has changed. And yes, we have taken on a few initiatives that cost a lot of money. In the current budgetary climate, we do need to work harder at raising some funds in order to keep these initiatives afloat. That said, I believe the national organization recognizes that not everyone is as enthusiastic about fundraising as others. I think the national organizations goals for us as members is for each of us to participate in fundraising in whatever way we can even if our participation is quiet. Some of us take part via our own personal contributions. Others are able to persuade people outside of the organization to donate various sums of money. Some of us prefer to sell things for our chapters during convention or Deering meet the blind campaigns. Whatever it takes. I think the important thing is for you to do what you can. Every little bit helps. It is likely that you may have more enthusiasm for some other part of our mission such as advocacy or public education. So spend your time on those efforts rather than moaning about our fundraising efforts. Trust me when I tell you that there are members who moan about our public education efforts. So it goes both ways really.
As a cane travel instructor, I was particularly struck by someone's comment regarding their suppose it inability to do structured discovery perfectly. I hate to disappoint you and all, but there is no perfect way to do structure discovery. Structure discovery is about teaching people the skills they need to make sense of the world and to act in it given their abilities and challenges. A teacher who is not sensitive to a person's challenges is no teacher at all. Likewise, a teacher who does not push a student out of their comfort zone is no teacher at all. And it doesn't really matter if that teacher is a travel instructor or a mentor at convention. The best teachers keep students in a sweet spot where they are definitely challenged, but not so challenged as to make the experience a total wash. If you are the student so to speak and find yourself with a teacher who either doesn't push you or who pushes you beyond your ability, then it is your responsibility to find somebody who can keep you in that sweet spot. It is also up to you to recognize the difference between your actual challenges and those that are self-imposed. As a final thought, if you do structure discovery perfectly, then you are probably doing it wrong anyway as structured discovery is never perfect, and that is true no matter what kind of blind person you are.
At the risk of babbling, let me finish my commentary by saying that those of you who have felt displaced as members of our organization are not alone. Many of us have had that experience and I think it comes with the territory of being one member among many within a vast organization whose membership succumbs to human failings. I suggest you keep talking to people about your experience as you will likely find someone who has been there and who can be both a support system and an advisor to you as to what you might do to find your place among us once again. Like I said, I have been there before and I am still working on finding my place. I'm not really sure when or how I will get there, but I am still confident that I will nonetheless.
Respectfully,
Jedi
Sent from my iPhone
> On Apr 1, 2014, at 6:28 PM, Darian Smith <dsmithnfb at gmail.com> wrote:
>
> Hi all,
> There has been some wonderful discussion here, and I’m sorry if I somehow repeat something that has been said, as i have not been able to get quite caught up on every message. nonetheless, Joe once again has brought up a host of great points, an I feel compelled to jump in here.
>
>
> It has been mentioned that the organization seems to focus on two things primarily; 1. fundraising, and 2. recruiting new members.
> I think both things are very important, but they should go hand in hand with being exemplary stewards of our funds and a true effort towards accepting /retaining our current membership. different people take different things from the organization. Some love what we do and want to be a part of it, others can’t give time but can give money, some not money but time, some want to be leaders and nothing more, some want to be members with no responsibility in the organization.
> Honestly, I think it’s very important that we continue to make an effort to accept people where they are in their blindness and meet their needs/answer questions where appropriate. doing these things over time will allow for us to be able to come to know our fellow members as people, as friends and this is what keeps people around.
>
> Some of us feel like we don’t have a real connection with people in our chapter, or affiliate and this is truly disheartening. Sometimes we need to reach out to the right person, sometimes there is more that we can do and simply giving up won’t solve the problem. It of course is totally possible that for whatever reason the leadership isn’t very receptive to new people or new ideas. If you believe in what the federation stands for and believe what we do is worth the time you are willing to give, then finding the right outlet in some part of the organization is very important, and I hope that everyone here does this.
> it is my opinion that we each has something unique to offer the movement. some of us are fundraisers, some of us are natural leaders, some of us know how to network, and in the grass-roots community work that we do all of these things are important.
>
>
> Darian
>
>
>> On Mar 30, 2014, at 11:00 AM, Arielle Silverman <arielle71 at gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>> Hi Joe,
>>
>> Thanks for sharing your experiences. I have not been following the
>> Braille Monitor that closely but I can understand what you are saying
>> about the increased emphasis on fund-raising. I have also felt like
>> the national convention is turning into more of a carnival with all
>> the exhibitors and prizes being given away, and much of banquet that
>> used to focus on philosophy and NFB spirit is now taken up with prize
>> drawings and the like.
>> To be fair, NFB was stronger financially when we joined than it is
>> now, and I understand that some national programs have been cut due to
>> a decrease in revenue from what used to be steady reliable income
>> sources. So NFB may be pushing fund-raising more, but the alternative
>> could be a loss of programs and resources.
>> I have not heard of anyone being blatantly turned away or refused
>> membership in an NFB chapter. If that ever happens it is truly
>> shameful. I do think that sometimes prospective members choose not to
>> join because they perceive hostility from the organization or judgment
>> of their lifestyle choices. I think part of that is perception only,
>> and part of it is reality. The NFB is stereotyped as a radical
>> one-size-fits-all organization, and new members expecting to find that
>> could be especially sensitive to cues of hostility. However, there
>> probably is some real lack of acceptance among certain segments of the
>> organization, which, again, is unfortunate. I will say that I am not
>> the most graceful blind person and was relatively unskilled when I
>> first joined, and I still felt completely accepted. But I know not all
>> of us are so lucky. I would encourage prospective members who have a
>> negative experience to try again in a different chapter or division
>> and perhaps they will find acceptance there. But at the same time,
>> this is something we need to be sensitive to in the organization.
>>
>> Arielle
>>
>>> On 3/30/14, Michael Capelle <michael.capelle at frontier.com> wrote:
>>> Hello all.
>>> This is why I am not apart of any "blind movement." I live my own life,
>>> live my own philosophy, ETC. I do not believe in a one size fits all
>>> mentality, which is unfurtunately what the NFB does.
>>> Thanks.
>>> Mike
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: RJ Sandefur
>>> Sent: Sunday, March 30, 2014 11:51 AM
>>> To: jsoro620 at gmail.com ; National Association of Blind Students mailing
>>> list
>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Success and Why I Left the NFB
>>>
>>> Joe, I agree with you. I had to attend both college, and Seminary without
>>> the NFB's help, although it would have been nice to have a mentoor. RJ
>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>> From: "Joe" <jsoro620 at gmail.com>
>>> To: "'National Association of Blind Students mailing list'"
>>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
>>> Sent: Sunday, March 30, 2014 12:25 PM
>>> Subject: [nabs-l] Success and Why I Left the NFB
>>>
>>>
>>>> 2006 was the last year I attended a national convention. While there I
>>>> was
>>>> caught up in the ra ra of the movement and felt glad to be in the company
>>>>
>>>> of
>>>> so many people who could relate to the challenges that awaited me as a
>>>> recent college graduate. I left convention, finished up my summer as a
>>>> counselor in Iowa, and set off for DC to begin my business with the real
>>>> world. I would never take away someone's enthusiasm from attending a
>>>> national convention or Washington Seminar or one of the weekend
>>>> leadership
>>>> seminars in Baltimore. They are very well-suited to boost a person's
>>>> spirit,
>>>> but I believe too many people fall through the cracks when faced with
>>>> reality outside of those infrequent gatherings.
>>>>
>>>> To be fair, the organization is no different from any other nonprofit
>>>> business. It needs money to sustain itself, and in turn it needs more
>>>> members to help raise the money. Still, I found it rather disappointing
>>>> that
>>>> so much of the board meeting I tuned into listen to last summer was
>>>> dominated by calls to raise money for this fund or that effort. I found
>>>> it
>>>> even sadder that a recent issue of the Braille Monitor, our monthly dose
>>>> of
>>>> inspiration, featured several articles just to the focus of generating
>>>> more
>>>> ways to drum up more financial support, but perhaps the most frustrating
>>>> byproduct of this new NFB are the e-mails from so-called friends from whom
>>>>
>>>> I
>>>> have not heard in years but boldly ask me to contribute to their NFB
>>>> fundraising campaigns.
>>>>
>>>> In short, at some point the NFB embraced enterprise and forgot about the
>>>> movement. Between 2006 and 2012 I went on to help lead development
>>>> efforts
>>>> for other nonprofits outside of the blindness field, also national in
>>>> scope.
>>>> They too made fundraising a priority, but it never felt like the top, or
>>>> the
>>>> only, priority. It gets tiresome when we focus on recruiting new blood
>>>> and
>>>> raising new money and forget about strengthening the members and
>>>> resources
>>>> we've already had.
>>>>
>>>> Nowadays I have the privilege of knowing some excellent blind
>>>> professionals.
>>>> I think they would do well in the NFB. They are smarter than I ever will
>>>> be
>>>> and have accomplished more than I may ever achieve, but they shun the
>>>> organization because they were turned away or because they were never
>>>> welcomed in the first place. It's something I should have kept in mind
>>>> when
>>>> I had my brief taste of leadership in the organization. I had too much of
>>>>
>>>> a
>>>> mouth on me to ever be anyone's golden child, but I was reliable enough
>>>> to
>>>> get the job done. But, getting the job done should have really meant
>>>> attracting and pulling in these men and women who could have made the NFB
>>>> lots better, listening to new ideas, and most important, remaining true
>>>> to
>>>> the cause and not some multi-million-dollar institute we find ourselves
>>>> incapable of sustaining.
>>>>
>>>> So, what does any of this have to do with the original post? I don't want
>>>>
>>>> it
>>>> to ever be said I was a hypocrite. The leadership may as well know what I
>>>> think of them, but more importantly, to the college kids on the verge of
>>>> spreading their own wings, I want you to know the NFB banner will only
>>>> guide
>>>> your way so far. Take what's great about the organization and leave the
>>>> political drama and marketing ploys behind. In the end it will be your
>>>> own
>>>> wits and talents that will earn your pay check. The NFB will never give
>>>> you
>>>> anything new. The philosophy merely helps you uncover what you always had
>>>>
>>>> to
>>>> be successful. Anything could happen with the new NFB president, and I
>>>> will
>>>> be the first to retract my words if he is brave enough to reverse this
>>>> downward spiral. You see, we no longer live in a world where the NFB is
>>>> necessary for collective momentum. Technology has seen to that. Whether
>>>> or
>>>> not the movement sticks around largely depends on how badly we want it to
>>>> exist.
>>>>
>>>> Is the ACB doing it any better? That's debatable, but you know what I've
>>>> found from the people I've met on that side of the house? They seem
>>>> happier,
>>>> and that's something we can't seem to figure out in our camp. The few
>>>> victories they celebrate they do with even less money. Let that be a
>>>> lesson
>>>> in financial management to you.
>>>>
>>>> I don't know what the hell I'm doing back here. I told myself I would
>>>> never
>>>> become one of those bitter former NFB members. My only goal was to
>>>> provide
>>>> different perspectives to the new generation of leaders coming up through
>>>> the ranks. After all, if you never taste the real world, you have no
>>>> business leading. That's like the teacher who teaches because they
>>>> couldn't
>>>> cut it, and believe it or not, I want to see more and more of you excel
>>>> at
>>>> whatever it is you want to do. The more of you there are, the greater our
>>>> strength.
>>>>
>>>> Moving forward I reckon I'll keep my opinions to myself here lest I be
>>>> the
>>>> rotten apple that spoils the bunch, but in some lame attempt to answer
>>>> the
>>>> original question, my answer would be this:
>>>>
>>>> The characteristics of a successful blind person are humility to consume
>>>> what they need to be successful, fortitude to turn away what will not,
>>>> and
>>>> wisdom to recognize the difference.
>>>>
>>>> Joe
>>>>
>>>> --
>>>> Twitter: @ScribblingJoe
>>>>
>>>> Visit my blog:
>>>> http://joeorozco.com/blog
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
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>>>
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