[nabs-l] Questions About Using Vocational Rehab's Services

[Kerri Kosten]

Hey Everyone:

Since I can't go back to school, I have to find a job or something to do.
What is it like using Rehab to help you find a job?
I'm afraid they will just place me into one of those sheltered
workshops doing something simple like for example shredding paper or
something like that and then when I want to go back to school my
family and my counselor will say something like "This is your job now.
You get paid doing this," or something like that and will mess with my
head and they will convince me I can't go back to school or anything.
How does using Rehab to help you find a job work?
How do blind people end up in those sheltered workshops, particularly
the ones that pay sub-minimum wages that the NFB has been trying so
hard to fight?
Does Rehab just place you in a job they want/think you should have
just to give you a job?
Does Rehab encourage you to do research and look for jobs on your own
or do they just dictate to you which ones they feel you should apply
for?
I have to make an appointment with my rehab counselor and I am really
really scared. The counselor I have now is one I really respect. He is
a former football player, who actually lost his eyesight playing
football for the team/school I am a huge fan of. Because of things
that have happened in my past (I won't go into it here, if you want to
know more email me off-list) I really look up to, and respect males
like my counselor who are really really into sports. Ever since I got
this counselor back in 2011, I have always tried to do my best for
him. Even though I was absolutely scared to death about going to
training at LCB, I pushed myself because I wanted to do well for him
and for him to see me as a motivated individual. After completing
training, when I would speak to him on the phone, he was always so
proud of me. He really thinks I am this motivated individual.
Now, the problem is I'm really not like that. I tried going back to
school last semester and unintentionally failed out. My counselor does
not know this yet, and when I have this meeting I will have to tell
him. I myself am very ashamed and embarrassed about what happened in
school, and don't really like talking about it with anyone,
particularly those I really look up to such as him.
I also really know nothing when it comes to just getting a random job
when you have no college degree. I'm not sure what I as a blind person
I could realistically do. This again really embarrasses me, because I
want my counselor to see me as confident, independent, and motivated.
Would it be best to maybe apply for a couple of jobs before I go into
the meeting so I can tell my counselor I have done a couple of things
on my own first? I could apply to our grocery store, or maybe Walmart
might be looking for a greeter or something like that...
I am just so so afraid I am going into this and will end up totally
depending on Rehab for everything and I don't want to do that.
Because of my lack of knologe of what I want to do and such, I'm
afraid my counselor is just going to place me in some kind of
sheltered workshop or something like that and since I can't go back to
school for a year, I will get comfortable in said job and then when I
want to go back to school or something everyone will convince me
otherwise.
I guess I just don't want my counselor realizing how much I have
slipped since coming back from training. He spent a lot of money to
send me to training, and I want to be confident and such the way we
were taught at training. But, I'm really really afraid as the meeting
progresses he will see through me and figure things out. I just really
struggle horribly with self-esteem issues, and when someone says to me
"I am so proud of you I sent you to training and now your setting the
world on fire," that makes me feel so good and I really want to
continue to do well for that person.
Any answers/experiences regarding rehab and your counselor you could
share would be great!
Thanks,
Kerri