[nabs-l] Mentoring a younger student; when enough is enough

Tue Feb 11 14:21:37 UTC 2014

Hi all,

I totally agree.  You come first, so do what you can to be helpful but
not at the expense of your academics or other school-related
obligations.

As competent blind students we often are asked to help those students
who are younger, could use more independence skills, etc.  I've been
asked to do it several times with several students in my school
district as well, and the requests have ranged from reasonable things
like braille tutoring and understanding tactile diagrams when the
student came from a school district with really horrible VI services,
to absurd things that jeopardized my schooling.  Heck, one time
another girl in my school forgot her notetaker on the day of a state
exam, so I was asked to give her mine and go through my classes
without access to my notes or textbook files.  Helping is not truly
helping if it is at anyone's expense.

I do have one question though.  I may just not understand because I
was always either the only blind kid in my school, or the oldest one
without multiple disabilities, but why exactly does the VI want you to
give the tour?  I can see why she might want to connect the two of
you, but I personally have always done campus orientations and run
through my class schedule with my mobility instructor or my parents
once it became silly to call in the instructor when my mom and I could
get it done in 15 minutes.  I'm just curious as to why the mobility
instructor who's job it is to familiarize this student with a new
school layout isn't involved in this, or if he isn't for some good
reason why her parents aren't taking initiative.

On 2/11/14, Ryan Silveira <ryan.l.silveira at gmail.com> wrote:
> Hi Lillie,
>
> I agree with what has been said thus far.  The only thing I would add
> to the above advice would be that, when you have the conversation with
> the TVI and the other girl's para, make sure that you convey the
> message that you are perfectly willing to help out, but that the
> student is not your responsibility.  The other thing would be just to
> be careful giving out your contact information.  This girl may somehow
> think you're her "BFF" and want to constantly hang out with you--I've
> seen it happen to some friends, so it's just something to watch out
> for.  Hope this helps.
>
> Ryan
>
> On 2/11/14, Joshua Hendrickson <louvins at gmail.com> wrote:
>> Hi Lily.  I would tell your VI teacher, that you don't mind helping
>> out htis student a little if your schedule per mits.  But, you don't
>> want to hinder your schooling, if helping this student is going to be
>> difficult because of having a lot of class work ETC.  It also really
>> depends on the student and if they genuinely accept your help if you
>> offer it.  When I was in college, a blind girl I knew called my house
>> and asked me if I could show her a couple routes on campus that she
>> was having trouble with.  The next day, I waited for her to meet me
>> where we had discussed so we could go the couple routes, and she never
>> showed up.  This happened another time as well.  If this new student
>> accepts your helping, just showing them a couple things might be ok,
>> but again, it really depends on them.
>>
>> On 2/11/14, Lillie Pennington <lilliepennington at fuse.net> wrote:
>>> Thank you both.
>>> I basically plan on waiting and seeing what happens with the tour. I
>>> also
>>> asked my vi when it was mentioned to have her write me a list of
>>> questions
>>> so I can gauge her position. I will also make sure she has my contact
>>> information so she can ask more questions at
>>>
>>> Sent from my iPhone
>>>
>>>> On Feb 11, 2014, at 12:26 AM, Darian <dsmithnfb at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>
>>>> Hi Lilly,
>>>> I think the easiest thing to do is to just have that conversation.
>>>> Think that it is okay to have a conversation with your teacher that
>>>> says
>>>> that you are happy to show them around campus, (You were once the one
>>>> who
>>>> was trying to figure out campus) but that because of your schedule, you
>>>> will be unable to do anything else beyond that.
>>>> I'm sure that your teacher will understand.
>>>> Hope that helps,
>>>> Darian
>>>>
>>>> This electronic message has been brought to you by my mobile device.
>>>>
>>>>> On Feb 10, 2014, at 9:17 PM, Lillie Pennington
>>>>> <lilliepennington at fuse.net> wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> Hello all
>>>>> I know my subject and message may sound heartless, and I apologize.
>>>>> There is a blind student a few years younger than me in my school
>>>>> district that will be attending my high school next year. I have
>>>>> helped
>>>>> this student by serving as a guide in going to middle school programs.
>>>>> My
>>>>> vi asked if I would do a tour of the high school and answer questions.
>>>>> This is fine with me.
>>>>> My fear is that I will be asked to help with some sort of tutoring. I
>>>>> do
>>>>> not feel I can do this. This student has multiple disabilities, I am
>>>>> not
>>>>> a teacher, and I will have a rigorous class schedule plus dealing with
>>>>> responsibilities with junior year. I have mentioned this to my parents
>>>>> and parra, who i feel are supporting me. However, I am afraid my vi
>>>>> will
>>>>> not understand my reasons or misconstrue them for me being rude, which
>>>>> I
>>>>> do not want to do. I do not want to say this to early and be
>>>>> presumptuous, but I do not want to be misleading. Thank you for any
>>>>> advice.
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>>>> her leisure. I am just afraid my vi will not understand my scheduling
>>>> problems since he is kind of out of the loop with my scheduling and
>>>> classes, or that I need additional help with time management and such.
>>>
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>>
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>
>
> --
> Ryan L. Silveira
>
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-- 
Kaiti