[nabs-l] Feeling faces: a myth or true?

[Kaiti Shelton]

This is quite the extensive thread.  Interesting to see what everyone
thinks about this.

A lot of good points have already been said.  I do have some usable
vision, but I've been offered the opportunity to feel people's faces.
I have never really wanted to do this when the opportunity arose, nor
do I even care about the little information I would get from it.  I
think it's just another case of sighted people placing so much
emphasis on the visual.  The face is the first thing they see in a
person, so they can't imagine not having access to it.

I did read something a few months back about the damage this myth has
done to the blind community.  The face feeling issue has come up so
much and is so taboo that a lot of blind people avoid touching other
people's faces, even when it is okay and appropriate to do so, like
when holding a baby, being affectionate with a significant other, or
when family tries to show the blind person something like a particular
facial expression.  I've had family show me facial expressions when
explaining with words didn't work, so that I could act on stage and
know how to contort my face to match the tones I knew to put in my
voice.  I otherwise wouldn't have had access to that information.

One thing I had to confront a few years ago, though I thankfully don't
anymore, was the issue of feeling a teacher's face in order to learn
musical concepts.  Playing a woodwind instrument can be a bit awkward
because it's very different from learning piano and feeling a
teacher's hands, or playing a stringed instrument and having the
teacher manipulate your own body to show you how it feels.  When
you're talking about very small movements around the mouth,
unfortunately feeling the face is somewhat necessary.  Thankfully both
of the teachers I've had were okay with this and I was the one who had
the bigger issue with it, but I think that without doing it neither of
them would have been as successful at teaching these skills to me and
correcting issues that arose from my missing out on all those
explanations of how to place the instrument in the mouth through my
school band classes in the first place.  It's awkward, yes, but in
some cases it is helpful.  However, I would still not advocate in
favor of doing it to everyone and think it's only something to be used
in appropriate situations.  It was cool to hear my first teacher tell
me one day when I was wigged out at the idea of touching her face that
she would do the same for sighted students if they would benefit more
from feeling it tactily than seeing it visually.  I think as long as
there is a purpose to it, either affection to a personal loved one or
for pedigogical reasons it is okay.

However, I was really wigged out at my state convention when a friend
told me that a woman was going around asking if she could feel
people's faces.  That's not okay.

On 11/30/15, Carly Mihalakis via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> Evening, everyone,
>
>          Okay. pre-conceive what you must, remembering that, you will
> know when it's time to feel the face of an intimate. And that's what
> we're talkin' about, intimates alone where it won't be "creepy."
> "10 AM 9/8/2014, Marissa Tejeda via nabs-l wrote:
>
>>Same here.  But where did it even come from?
>>
>>
>>----- Original Message -----
>>From: Chris Nusbaum <dotkid.nusbaum at gmail.com
>>To: Marissa Tejeda <marissat789 at gmail.com>,National Association of
>>Blind Students mailing list <nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>>Date sent: Mon, 8 Sep 2014 08:45:32 -0400
>>Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Feeling faces: a myth or true?
>>
>>It's a myth.  I have never felt someone's face nor have I known any
>>blind person who has, although sighted people have on occasion
>>invited me to feel their face if I needed to.  I don't know how it
>>would help, but something in the idea of feeling the face of a
>>stranger creeps me out.  (Smile)
>>
>>Chris Nusbaum
>>
>>Sent from my iPhone
>>
>>On Sep 8, 2014, at 8:25 AM, Marissa Tejeda via nabs-l
>><nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>
>>Hi guys,
>>
>>So, for a long time I've been want to know this, but never got
>>around to asking.  I, personally, don't feel faces to know what
>>people look like.  Do people really feel faces? How can it give
>>someone a picture if they feel the face? Is this just a movie and a
>>myth, or reality and true?
>>
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-- 
Kaiti Shelton
University of Dayton-Music Therapy
President, Ohio Association of Blind Students 2013-Present
Secretary, The National Federation of the Blind Performing Arts
Division 2015-2016

"You can live the life you want; blindness is not what holds you back!"