[nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
Marion & Martin
swampfox1833 at verizon.net
Sat Feb 13 21:18:29 UTC 2010
Mark,
Have you been accepted to a college? Will you be beginning your studies
in the fall? Then you can apply!
Fraternally yours,
Marion
----- Original Message -----
From: "Mark J. Cadigan" <kramc11 at gmail.com>
To: "NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users"
<nagdu at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Saturday, February 13, 2010 10:18 AM
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>I was definitely thinking about going to the NFB convention. I just was not
>planning on dragging my parents along kicking and screeming. As for
>scholarships, I am not eligible for any as far as I know.
>
> Thanks
> Mark
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Marion & Martin" <swampfox1833 at verizon.net>
> To: "NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users"
> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Saturday, February 13, 2010 12:59 AM
> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>
>
>> Mark,
>> The best advice I can give you on transitioning to a dog or
>> transitioning to college is "Don't let it stress you out!" As for doing
>> them simultaneously, see previous sentence! (smile) You may not be able
>> to control the pressures from the outside, but yu can control your
>> reactions to them. Don't sweat the small stuff....it's all small stuff!
>> Hey, did you ever think of asking your parents to go with you to an
>> NFB convention? You would have an awesome time and your parents would, as
>> well!"Oh, sure!" you say to yourself sarcastically, "How much fun it
>> would be to have 3000 blind people in one place!"
>> Your parents might learn how many mentors there are for you! You could
>> bring them to the NAGDU meeting so they could meet 100 or so of the most
>> dedicated guide dog users in the country! Yeah, that might be fun!
>> Also, have you thought about applying for an NFB scholarship? Maybe
>> you getting $3000 - 12,000 might be a way to get them there! What do you
>> plan to study in college?
>>
>> Fraternally yours,
>> Marion Gwizdala
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Fraternally yours,
>> Marion
>>
>> ----- Original Message -----
>> From: "Mark J. Cadigan" <kramc11 at gmail.com>
>> To: "NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users"
>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Thursday, February 11, 2010 10:13 AM
>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>>
>>
>>> Thanks again for all of your suggestions. I will use the points made on
>>> this list next time I talk to the parents. Any thoughts about
>>> transitioning to college and a dog simultaneously?
>>>
>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>> From: "Joy Relton" <jrelton at verizon.net>
>>> To: "'NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users'"
>>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>> Sent: Thursday, February 11, 2010 9:50 AM
>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>>>
>>>
>>>> Hi Mark,
>>>>
>>>> When I went to college I shared my suite with two other women but my
>>>> room
>>>> was a single. Fortunately I was able to do this, but my reason for
>>>> electing
>>>> this arrangement had to do with the amount of equipment and the type of
>>>> equipment that I used to study, not my dog. In those days, and I'm now
>>>> dating myself, we had reel-to-reel machines to use to read the books
>>>> and all
>>>> other kinds of equipment like a typewriter, a Braille writer and more.
>>>> There
>>>> weren't computers, Victor Reader Streams or any of that stuff and I
>>>> thought
>>>> spreading all of my stuff all over the room and taking up more than my
>>>> share
>>>> would be unfair. My dog, slept next to my bed in the center part of the
>>>> suite with the other two women and was never a problem. When I shared
>>>> apartments it was never a problem with my room mates. In fact, one of
>>>> my
>>>> room mates went to the doctor and he asked her if there were any
>>>> animals in
>>>> the apartment that she could be allergic to and she said no. Then the
>>>> doctor
>>>> asked if she wasn't rooming with me and didn't I have a Seeing Eye Dog?
>>>> She
>>>> said, oh I didn't even think of Vikki as a dog or any other animal.
>>>> When it
>>>> was in the dorms or apartment buildings my friends all enjoyed my dog
>>>> along
>>>> with me. There were rules about not petting while in harness but she
>>>> enjoyed
>>>> many a game of ball down the halls of the dorm and traveled with me and
>>>> my
>>>> friends everywhere. I have never had anyone tell me that my dogs were
>>>> not
>>>> well groomed, or that they smelled and they've been welcome pretty much
>>>> anywhere that I have gone. If they weren't and it was a legal issue I
>>>> addressed it, if it was the other persons preference I let them deal
>>>> with it
>>>> and didn't invade their space and ensured that they did the same with
>>>> me.
>>>>
>>>> In fact, the last two dogs that I have had to put to sleep have been so
>>>> well
>>>> accepted by my church that the members of the choir donated money
>>>> toward
>>>> hymnals and made contributions to the Seeing Eye in their honor. I'd
>>>> say
>>>> that was acceptance. I'm guessing that you'll work out your issues with
>>>> your
>>>> parents when you let them see that you are an adult who is capable of
>>>> handling your life and your life decisions. Be gentle with your parents
>>>> though, as the song says "teach your children well, their children's
>>>> hell
>>>> will slowly go by". In other words, it's probably premature to push the
>>>> dog
>>>> issue since you don't know yet where you will be. In the mean time,
>>>> collect
>>>> the facts and meet some folks in the area who are using dogs
>>>> successfully.
>>>> Then, make your decision based on what's best for you and nicely inform
>>>> your
>>>> parents. That's what my kids have done. We have the type of
>>>> relationship
>>>> that my husband and I have always sought to ensure that they have the
>>>> tools
>>>> to make their own decisions and the understanding that, if they make a
>>>> mistake they can come for help and support whether or not we agree with
>>>> their decision. Talking to your parents on some of these issues will go
>>>> further than talking to us, except for gathering information and facts.
>>>> Good
>>>> luck.
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>> Behalf
>>>> Of Mark J. Cadigan
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 7:59 PM
>>>> To: NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users
>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> Thanks all of you for your suggestions. I like both the Seeing Eye, and
>>>> GDB.
>>>>
>>>> Ware as I live in MA the Seeing Eye is a lot closer. I am a junior in
>>>> high
>>>> school so I haven't yet decided what college I will be attending. What
>>>> I do
>>>> know, is I want to be in a big city with access to a good public
>>>> transit
>>>> network such as the MBTA. I currently take the T to and from places all
>>>> over
>>>>
>>>> Boston using my cane. Because of this independence I am having
>>>> difficulty
>>>> explaining to my parents that a dog would only enhance it making me a
>>>> more
>>>> competent, safer, and faster traveler. Have any of you ever experienced
>>>> complaints about your dog either shedding or smelling bad? Is this a
>>>> problem
>>>>
>>>> with roommates in college? Like most teenagers my room is never clean
>>>> for
>>>> long, but it is never that messy. I always take excellent care of all
>>>> my
>>>> equipment, and don't see how the maintenance of a dog will be a
>>>> problem. My
>>>> parents seem to have concerns of how I will maintain a dog in college.
>>>> Any
>>>> thoughts?
>>>>
>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>> From: "Albert J Rizzi" <albert at myblindspot.org>
>>>> To: "'NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users'"
>>>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 2:29 PM
>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>> First, where are you located? Maybe there is a guide program in your
>>>>> area which would allow you to sort of host a dog for sometime until
>>>>> the guide is matched up with a handler. This would help to introduce
>>>>> your parents to the
>>>>> concepts and strength having a guide could and would lend to your
>>>>> life.
>>>>> You
>>>>> could also let them know that their role in your life is to make you
>>>>> as
>>>>> completely independent as possible and that the introduction of a
>>>>> guide
>>>>> dog
>>>>> into your life would do just that. you could also play on their
>>>>> sympathies
>>>>> by letting them know you are looking to be able to walk independently
>>>>> with
>>>>> friends and thereby depend less on their eyes and more so on your own
>>>>> senses
>>>>> coupled with the security and independence a guide would lend to your
>>>>> life.
>>>>> Where are you intending on going to college? If you are hoping to go
>>>>> away,
>>>>> your parents would need to understand that a guide would help you to
>>>>> move
>>>>> swiftly and securely through a campus ensuring your timely attendance
>>>>> to
>>>>> all
>>>>> your classes. Again, maybe a talk with a teacher/principal might help
>>>>> advance your crusade.
>>>>>
>>>>> Albert J. Rizzi, M.Ed.
>>>>> CEO/Founder
>>>>> My Blind Spot, Inc.
>>>>> 90 Broad Street - 18th Fl.
>>>>> New York, New York 10004
>>>>> www.myblindspot.org
>>>>> PH: 917-553-0347
>>>>> Fax: 212-858-5759
>>>>> "The person who says it cannot be done, shouldn't interrupt the one
>>>>> who is doing it."
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> Visit us on Facebook LinkedIn
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>>> Behalf Of Mark J. Cadigan
>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 2:11 PM
>>>>> To: NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users
>>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>>>>>
>>>>> Dan W,
>>>>>
>>>>> My mom claims to be terrified of dogs, but yet we have a pet dog. My
>>>>> parents claim that a guide dog will smell, then I point out that if
>>>>> you take
>>>>>
>>>>> care of it properly it won't. Then I point out people we know with
>>>>> guide dogs that don't smell. My dad's response to this is to tell this
>>>>> story of his friend's son's roommate's friend had a roommate with a
>>>>> smelly guide dog.
>>>>>
>>>>> This happened so long ago, and is so far removed from the situation
>>>>> that I can't see how it possibly has any bearing on the current
>>>>> situation. Also that story is so convoluted that is impossible to
>>>>> verify. And the argument goes on and on Ad nauseam. It is getting to
>>>>> the point that I think they are just attempting to exorcize there
>>>>> ability to make arbitrary decisions.
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>> From: "Dan Weiner" <dcwein at dcwein.cnc.net>
>>>>> To: "'NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users'"
>>>>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 1:33 PM
>>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>> Well, first question is "Is the reason your parents don't support
>>>>>> your idea of getting a dog that they don't like dogs?"--smile.
>>>>>> Second of all, what is your parents objection, I mean presumably
>>>>>> you're
>>>>>> the
>>>>>> one who's blind so maybe you might know a little better than they do
>>>>>> whether
>>>>>> a dog would enhance your lifestyle or not.
>>>>>> I'm fortunate that by the time I wanted a dog, my parents had figured
>>>>>> out
>>>>>> I'd pretty much do what I wanted without permission, so my Dad just
>>>>>> asked
>>>>>> one or two feeble questions and then left it alone.
>>>>>> He asked "Are you sure a dog will be worth the trouble, how do you
>>>>>> know
>>>>>> it'll work out."
>>>>>> I explained that, never having a dog, a guide dog, that is, I'd need
>>>>>> to
>>>>>> find it out for myself and I really wanted to take care of the dog
>>>>>> and
>>>>>> was
>>>>>> ready.
>>>>>> When I got home, he admired the dog enormously. But he asked the
>>>>>> second
>>>>>> day
>>>>>> back home if the dog really had to go out with us to breakfast. I
>>>>>> said it
>>>>>> did, when he seemed to balk I said "I love you Dad, and enjoy going
>>>>>> out,
>>>>>> but
>>>>>> this is important to me and if you don't want my guide dog than I'm
>>>>>> afraid
>>>>>
>>>>>> I
>>>>>> won't be going".
>>>>>> Dead silence ensued, and the issue never came up again. As a matter
>>>>>> of fact, my Dad adopted my first hound after he retired and loved
>>>>>> him. The dog, Grant, even went to my Dad's funeral's The only thing
>>>>>> I wasn't really ready for was the access issues. Being the brilliant
>>>>>> young man I was--smile--it never occurred to me that people would
>>>>>> have issues with a dog, I mean access issues to public places.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So, tell us more what the problem is and we'll be happy to talk about
>>>>>> it. There are some folks on this list who can be very good role
>>>>>> models and mentors, I wish there had been such a list when I started
>>>>>> out. But, then I don't think there were such things as computer
>>>>>> lists--smile.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Good luck
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Dan W. and the Carter Dog
>>>>>>
>>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>>> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>>>> Behalf
>>>>>> Of Mark J. Cadigan
>>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 1:17 PM
>>>>>> To: nagdu at nfbnet.org
>>>>>> Subject: [nagdu] Explaining to parents that guide dogs are useful
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Hello list,
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I am new to this list, and I am thinking of getting a guide dog for
>>>>>> when
>>>>>> I
>>>>>> go to college. The only problem I am having is convincing my parents
>>>>>> that
>>>>>> a
>>>>>> guide dog is a useful mobility tool. As you can probably guess, that
>>>>>> is
>>>>>> a
>>>>>> large obstacle. I am currently in high school, so I have to abide by
>>>>>> my
>>>>>> parent's wishes, or at least for now. What I am asking for is how
>>>>>> best to
>>>>>> explain to them, that guide dogs are useful mobility tools, that will
>>>>>> enhance my independence rather than detract from it. I have given
>>>>>> them
>>>>>> literature, DVDs and have attempted to talk to them. Any
>>>>>> instructional
>>>>>> materiel finds its way into the circular file, and they change the
>>>>>> subject
>>>>>> when I talk to them. Any and all suggestions are welcome.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Thanks
>>>>>> Mark
>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>>> et
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
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>>>>>
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