[nagdu] Tired, depressed and discouraged

Tue Jun 22 15:57:19 UTC 2010

Gail,

Yup.  Here, too.  Also, living way out in the idyllic countryside leaves one
little to chose from and few to no options.  Unless you can drive a hundred
miles or more or get someone to drive you if you can't drive yourself...
Then hope you have enough energy left over for the doctor's appointment.
Crazy.

Well, I went through a lot of that with fibromyalgia, although I did have to
come over here to Portland (where I live now, but not then) for a major eye
exam when I became legally blind.  But at least the ophthamologist in La
Grande didn't ignore the objective findings because he didn't like them!
With fibro, it's all very subjective, so the doctor can arbitrarily decide
you're not in as much pain as you say are without having to be bothered by
hard facts.  Then charge you money for his/her expertise, of c ourse.

For a doctor to ignore repeated objective test results is really something
else.  And he's being paid by the state?  And he's affecting your access to
tools you need to function based on his evaluation?  Crazy.

I wish I had something useful to offer you for a solution that will actually
help in your real life.  But when you live far far from resources, or when
the resources that should be there aren't anymore, there's little one can do
except for what you can do on your own.  Like teach yourself O&M.  /smile/
Been there, done that, too.  Scary, ridiculously dangerous, but if your only
option is to stay home and if you find that unacceptable, there's nothing
for it but to grab the white cane and go forth and conquer the stinking
sidewalk and hope you live crossing the street at the other end.  Looking
back, now that I've developed those listening and other O&M skills to judge
what's going on around me, including what's coming towards me on the big,
scary road, I find myself wondering what used to take me so long to cross a
street back then.  I have stood on some curbs in La Grande -- and more in
Bend -- listening and wondering how in heck I was supposed to figure out
when it was safe.  Then finally running across the street waving my cane
wildly because I was sure I was going to die.  Then being really embarrassed
when I got to the other side.  /lol/

I do like your humor and attitude.  If you can see the ridiculousness of it
all and laugh at yourself as you go along, you will manage to get through
it.  Hang in there!

Tami Smith-Kinney

-----Original Message-----
From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf
Of Gail
Sent: Friday, June 18, 2010 5:19 PM
To: nagdu at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Tired, depressed and discouraged

I'm certain they are on a par with voodoo and witch doctors! I know, because
 living as we do below the poverty level, that quality of doctors accessible
to me is the worst. I learned long ago to do a lot of the backwork myself,
to figure out what the possible DXes might be, and only then go to the
doctor. Having that info presented to them, along with the symptoms, has
been the only way I've been able to get anything taken care of! 

Gail 

-------Original Message------- 

From: Sherri 
Date: 6/18/2010 6:51:11 PM 
To: NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users 
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Tired, depressed and discouraged 

Hi Gail, 

I'm sorry you are having so many problems with your doctor. I can certainly 
Identify! They just don't understand how expensive things are. After over 30

Years as a medical transcriptionist, I have concluded that much of what they

Do is guess work. Hang in there and best of luck! 
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Gail" <deerskin at oct.net> 
To: <nagdu at nfbnet.org> 
Sent: Friday, June 18, 2010 6:58 PM 
Subject: [nagdu] Tired, depressed and discouraged 

> 
> Well, we got back a little while ago, and I dont know what to think or do.

> The doc ran the Humphries *again* (third time now), and got the same kind 
> of 
> 
> Results. He just cant figure why-or accept- I see the dots around that 
> Central light, and miss the others. It doesnt matter that I tell him 1)its

> Hard to sit there staring at that tiny yellow dot *and* catch all the 
> white 
> Dots. 2) its hard to keep my concentration from wandering now and then, so

> That makes me lose some of them. 3) I see them, but I always click fast 
> Enough to catch one before another pops up.4) some I miss just because I 
> Have things floating in my eyes becaue of being tired or headache, so 
> those 
> Can distract or cover dots. 
> 
> So, now he seems to have backed out of the Dxs he had given me before, and

> Now wants me to have an MRI and go to Kansas City- a drive of over 100 
> miles 
> 
> One way- to see a neuro there. I'm so tired and depressed that I cant 
> Remember any more of what he said. But that trip will be expensive for 
> us-we 
> have been married 20 years, and have never been able to afford to go to KC

> for anything other than to the airport to pick up someone-exhausting for 
> me, 
> and I'm supposed to go there and be in one piece for more testing?! This 
> is 
> getting weirder every time we go to this guy, but he keeps saying he has 
> to 
> have this done. Yeah, like he said today's Humphries would be the definite

> test.... 
> 
> 
> But when three tests have the same results, of the visual field being the 
> Same, why cant he accept that I have problems/legally blind, and we take 
> Care of the KC trip some other time? This guy is driving me nuts, with his

> Inability to stick with one dx or accept what tests show him.... And with 
> not even the dx he gave me 2 weeks ago, I'm toast. 
> 
> Gail 
> 
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