[nagdu] Body language

[Lisa Irving]

Yeah Julie, there's a lot to be said about body language. That's why 70% of 
what we discern from conversations comes from our body language. When you've 
completed the workshop, I'd really appreciate it if you'd contact me off 
line. I really want to know as much as I can about body language.

These are some body language movements I've received feedback on. Looking 
down in sighted society is read as lack of self confidence. Looking at the 
person; in the direction of their voice and just a tad above, shows 
assertiveness, self confidence and interest in what the other person is 
saying. Many years ago a secretary ripped into me because I didn't look in 
her direction when she spoke to me. She wrongly accused me of being rude. 
Blank stares and not much facial expression is perceived as depressed, 
stormy and odd. In social situations such as the women's Bible study I 
attend, I try to have an inviting smile. I "gaze" around the room. I'm not 
sure if it makes a difference. I figure it beats looking like I often feel; 
that is, left out, alone is a sea of chatty and friendly folks, a bit 
alienated too. My mother harped at me about pulling my shoulders back and 
standing straight. I later learned not only did she care about my posture, 
she also recognized how odd blind and visually impaired individuals look 
when we look at the ground. In my case I used to do that because I was 
straining to see. Speaking of straining to see, I had a very fruitful 
conversation with a supervisor a few years ago. She was bent because she 
thought I arched my eye brows in disapproval. I explained to her that some 
visually impaired folks do this because we're straining to see. She found 
the explanation helpful. Her feedback has helped me to be cognizant about 
not arching my eye brows. She was also quite upset with me because when I 
placed my hand on my hip and leaned forward on my foot, she perceived me as 
being defiant. Finally, I was involved in the production of an inclusion 
video a few years back. The videographer spent more time than any of us 
planned coaching me on not whipping my head so fast when I looked toward 
some one. I try to slowly; not exaggerated, turn my head to one side. He 
gave me feedback on other things I was doing that looked out of place. All 
of this has been quite helpful.

When I'm not glaring or scowling I find people are receptive to helping or 
interacting with me.

Lisa and Bernie
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Julie J" <julielj at neb.rr.com>
To: "NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users" 
<nagdu at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, March 10, 2011 10:16 AM
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Beyond the Obvious...How Does Your Guide Assist You?


> Yup,  I was in the pharmacy yesterday picking up meds for Kiddo and the 
> cashier asks me where Monty is.  I haven't been in there in months, but 
> she always remembers Monty's name.  I'm really tempted to ask if she 
> remembers my name, which she doesn't because I've never told her, but so 
> far I've remained polite.
>
> I don't mind casual conversations about the dog while I'm standing in 
> line, riding the elevator or sitting in a waiting room somewhere.  It's 
> idle conversation that passes the time.  I do get severely annoyed when 
> I'm trying to conduct some sort of business and the person  keeps getting 
> distracted by the dog.
>
> I can't think of a single conversation about the dog that has resulted in 
> some sort of long term business acquaintance or other beneficial 
> relationship.  Mostly people seem to want their curiosity satisfied and 
> then we part ways never to meet again.
>
> I'm taking this workshop on body language next month.  I'm very curious to 
> see how body language might affect approachability.  I wonder if that 
> might be part of the reason that some guide dog handlers are approached 
> more often, offered more help or experience more access issues.  I think 
> there are a lot of factors that figure into the equation, but body 
> language might be one way we could steer the situation into an agreeable 
> direction.  it will be interesting.
>
> Julie
>
>
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