[nagdu] Feeling guilty and selfish

[Tami Kinney]

Bibi,

Yup! I have had those feelings. Sometimes those feelings are based on a
realization that that is what I have been doing. /shrug/ So I begin to
make an effort to do better and hope for the best. /smile/ Other times,
I feel that way because I've gone all soft on my sweet little poodle
buddy who is really just fine and wishes I would get over it so she can
get on with showing me how brilliant she is at doing her job. /grin/

Conventions are a real test, though. Well, I've only managed to make the
one national convention, when my pup was 2 years and 2 weeks... And we
were both completely over our heads! So then when I realized I needed to
slap some sense into myself and refocus on helping my dog first, I ended
up having a very different convention than I had planned (well, who
doesn't), but we had a lot of fun and met a lot of cool people and she
came through it okay, which I had really wondered about since I had been
so selfish stupid as to put her into that pressure cooker before she was
ready. Whew! I learned a lot of good tips from others, too, about how to
handle that special convention stress for a guide dog. /lol/ I also
learned about halfway through that the reason it seemed I had the only
poodle guide there was because I actually did have the only poodle guide
there. All the rest of the poodle guide users had left theirs at home
because the poodle temperament doesn't really do well in that kind of
setting. Oh. So there I was with a young overstressed poodle guide in a
red sport harness... So much for making all my mistakes without their
being noticed. How do I manage to do these things to myself? /lol/

In our busy human lives (or even not as busy as they should be human
lives), I find that the balance between her needs and mine can be tricky
to find. Other people manage to do it, so I keep trying. /smile/

Tami

On Fri, 2011-09-23 at 22:35 -0600, Criminal Justice Major Extraordinaire
wrote: 
> hi, Cindy,
> When I've attended some ACB/NFB conventions, I usually came across many 
> volunteers.
> I was also told by a GEB instructor if need be, there wasn't a problem with 
> taking sighted guide when it was needed.
> Same thing was said when I trained at Pilot.
> On the my last day of convention which I stayed from Sunday night through 
> Wednesday night, Odie became tired out and he was really done with it all.
> It took a lot of encouragement from me to keep him going.
> A few times on Thursday, I did take the opportunity to use sighted guide to 
> give Odie a break somewhat as I really didn't want to push him further.
> He did fine during thre first three ACB conventions, but by the time we 
> attended the fourth, he'd had enough of it and was done with all of it.
> I could have gone back to another convention, but for the expense, I 
> couldn't afford it anymore and figured that I had to think about Odie's 
> feelings before mine.
> I wonder if it is just me, or have other handlers gone through times of 
> where they feel selfish and just think upon themselves and don't think about 
> the feelings of their four-legged furry partner.
> After a while before Odie was forced to be retired medically as a guide, I 
> started to have that guilty feeling to where I was only thinking about 
> myself and not directly thinking about how he was feeling.
> Bibi and Odie
> the happy spirited bounty labra wolf 
> 
> 
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