[nagdu] could have, would have, should have

[Lyn Gwizdak]

Hey Daniel,
Don't beat yourself up.  You did what you felt was best at the time.

I'm sorry this all happened to you. And I do know the heartbreak upon having 
to send a dog back. We do get attached emotionally to these dogs!  But you 
must see to your own safety as well.

I once had a dog for about two and a half years that turned out to be a dog 
that the school shouldn't have even sent out as a guide.  I tried to make it 
work.  I was never really endangered by the dog's work like you were but 
there were many unacceptable behaviors that caused me alot of grief.  Years 
later, when I applied to that school where I got that dog, they even told me 
that the dog should never have gone out and they were more careful in what 
dogs they passed and I was NOT to blame for the troubles.  And you are not 
to blame for the failure of the team.  Dogs and humans are living beings 
were there's no guarentees in how the two will gel.  This can happen to 
anyone who uses a guide dog.

You need to do what is best for you and you need the time to grieve the loss 
of the dog.  You weren't even given the option of keeping the dog for a pet? 
Please don't feel that you were a failure at having a guide dog - you 
weren't.  Could you have been hard headed, yeah. (grin!) But we all make 
mistakes in life and we don't need to beat ourselves up for making them.  It 
is up to us to learn from the mistakes we do make and move on.  That's life!

I hope you do decide to try again if you feel that is the right decision for 
you.  You do things on your own time and don't let anyone push you into 
something you aren't ready for or even want to do.  If you should feel like 
trying a dog again, just remember to be as CLEAR as possible to what you 
want in a dog, your living situation, working or school situation and the 
conditions there.  This information will give the school as clear an image 
of you and the environment the dog will be working in.  This will help them 
greatly in providing you the best possible match for you.

This sad time will pass and I do hope that nobody on this list does a "told 
you!" as that is never helpful to anyone.

Regards,

Lyn and Landon
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "DJS" <falcoisking at comcast.net>
To: "NAGDU Mailing List" <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Sunday, February 26, 2012 12:16 PM
Subject: [nagdu] could have, would have, should have


> Hello all,
>
>
>
> I don't know if some of you remember me, but I was a participant in the 
> list
> about 3 years ago. I had the guide dog, Scout. He was the one who ran me
> into my pond, crashed me into the grocery cart and busted my tooth, etc.
>
> I had 2 trainers out from the school to work with me, but his behavior 
> never
> really got above about a "c". I still kept working with him, because I 
> just
> loved him so much, and he was such a loving dog.
>
> I always looked past running into an occasional doorway, or a post here 
> and
> there.
>
> The final straw came last month when we were walking and a truck backed 
> out
> of a driveway on a very busy street and knocked us both out into the 
> street.
> The dog suffered no injuries thank goodness, but I suffered a concussion 
> and
> several bruised ribs.
>
> As usual, he was not paying attention to what he was doing.
>
> To make a long story short, the school came and career changed him about 2
> weeks ago.
>
> I am pretty much devastated.
>
> I know, and most of you at the time I got him, told me I should return 
> him,
> but did I listen? NO.
>
> I so wish I had. I feel I have wasted so long a time. I really thought I
> could make it work.
>
> The trainers kept telling me to work on different techniques, and I did. I
> wanted it to work so badly. Of course when they picked him up, they told 
> me
> it was a total mis-match from the beginning, and that I should never have
> left the school with that dog.
>
> A lot of good that does now - over 3 and a half years later.
>
>
>
> This has been such a bad experience from the beginning, I don't know if I
> will ever want to go through the experience again.
>
>
>
> I guess I am looking for some words of wisdom from you guys, and some help
> to go through this grief I am feeling at losing my best friend, even 
> though
> he was not the best guide dog.
>
>
>
> You can be critical of me too, just please not to hard just yet, because I
> am so sad.  I only wish I knew then what I know now.
>
>
>
> Thanks for any support.
>
>
>
> Daniel
>
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