[nagdu] Question about puppy raisers

Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC) REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com
Mon Jun 25 15:12:20 UTC 2012


I get this. And thank you for explaining. Sounds like you just read the poem at a bad time for you.

-----Original Message-----
From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Anon. Y.mous
Sent: Monday, June 25, 2012 11:06 AM
To: NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Question about puppy raisers

Yes, you're right; there is another issue: I just had to give up my last pup just over a month ago and I am still very much hurting because of that.  It's like making a "your mom" joke when somebody's mother just died: it's not really ever appropriate or tasteful, but it's not a huge deal unless somebody is already hurting and then it becomes something big to that person.  But in this case, raisers hurt overwhelmingly and then we come back for more, knowing we are going to hurt the same way again.  And if it's going to be used as fodder for a joke, it's just not worth it.  I wasn't sure if this was a common sentiment among guide dog users.  Luckily, the responses have shown me that the majority of handlers don't feel this way.  The hurt is worth it for that.
 
My problem with it wasn't the bit about contact, but that it lumped raisers into the same category as all the other people who approach guide dog users when they are out and generally make it more difficult to go about their business.  Raisers were an impediment to the guide dog user in the poem.  I don't go through this so I can be an impediment. 
 
As an aside, having a two-line exchange with somebody once a year doesn't mean you're friends with them; it's just a nice perk for the raiser.  Of course, I never go into this expecting any contact, but I am absolutely delighted when I get that once-a-year email.  I'm not friends with any of the handlers of the pups that I raised, but I do appreciate the handlers who recognize how much two lines of email contact once a year means to me.
 
I'm not too worried about liking my future guide's raisers -- I will actually only go to a school that allows contact because it's so important to me to be able to do that for the raisers, and I know I am going to maintain contact unless the raisers wish not to for whatever reason.
 

________________________________
 From: "Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)" <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
To: "'NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users'" <nagdu at nfbnet.org> 
Sent: Monday, June 25, 2012 8:57 AM
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Question about puppy raisers
  
I'm sorry this stanza hurt you.
I'm also thinking that if one stanza from one poem can upset you this much, that there are other issues.

You mentioned that you are loosing your vision and are thinking of getting a guide dog. Maybe you are worried about that?  Maybe you are worried you will not like your future dog's raisers and wish to be friends with them?

Know that you can appreciate what someone does but not choose to be friends with them.

Know too that you may be done with raising puppies. That's fine too. The cycle has got to be draining. Perhaps this poem hit a nerve because you feel you need to stop?  That's okay too.

My take is that one line from one poem shouldn't make you feel this bad. You'd do well to look deeper into this reaction.

-----Original Message-----
From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of d m gina
Sent: Sunday, June 24, 2012 6:39 PM
To: nagdu at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Question about puppy raisers

Hello,
I am waiting for a dog, and I know I won't be able to know who raised
my dog from the school I am going to.
Even though I would love to know, I have had your experience, where I
tried to be a friend to raisers and it went no where.
I am sorry this poem is hurting, and for this I can only say I am sorry.
I would love to know where you raise, but that wasn't your question.
I am also sorry you don't hear from the folks of the pups you raised.
I have watched my friends know their raisers, and the raisers would
give them dog food and much more.
Now I am not saying this should happen, but it made me sad, because I
wished someone would have taken interest in their dogs even to say I
miss you my dear.
Hope that makes sense.
Original message:
> Hello,

> I am new here.  I am a long-time puppy raiser, my sister has RP and is
> a guide dog user, and I have RP so a guide might be in my future as
> well.  When I first found this list about a month ago, I poked around
> for threads relating to me, and one term that I searched was "raiser."
> One thing I found really disturbed me and has been nagging at me for
> the past month, so I figured I might as well throw it out to everyone
> before making any decisions.

> The "problem post" occurred in a Christmas poem posted several years
> ago.  One of the stanzas was about puppy raisers:

> "Some man comes from nowhere with the purpose to tell, that he's
> 'trained' seven puppies as guide dogs, oh swell.  He badgers my
> handler, asking him why some blind folks get nasty when he stops them
> to pry.  'Don't you people know what we raisers give up?  We expend so
> much money and love raising your pup.  We clean up their messes all day
> and all night.  The least you blind people could do is to write.  I
> don't get a card or a letter to say that my baby is good or he's doing
> okay.' ... So don't let your big ego get in the way.  Blind handlers
> appreciate you just fine, okay?"
> I was in tears by the end of this (and I'm a pretty stoic person!).  I
> know it's supposed to be a kind of snarky poem about stereotypes of
> each "problem group," but this really hurt.  It's making fun of
> something that you just shouldn't make fun of, if that makes any
> sense.  I thought of my past puppies and the very real and very deep
> love I still have for each of them and how much I still miss them (even
> though I absolutely know they are not mine!).  I am hoping that their
> handlers don't view me this way, kind of minimizing the depth of the
> relationship I had with the dog.


> Ever since I read that, all of the enthusiasm and sparks I bring to my
> raising have been absent, and I've thus I'm toying with not raising
> again.  You just can't raise a guide pup if your heart isn't in it.


> For the record, I'm definitely not somebody who thinks raising is this
> saintly selfless act -- I don't know any raisers who think that,
> actually.  I get a ton out of it.  Still doesn't make turn-in any easier.


> I know each school has different policies and relationships with
> raisers, and each individual graduate does as well.  I know there are
> some raisers on this list -- does anybody have any reaction to this?
> I'm not looking for opinions about school policies, rather thoughts of
> individual guide dog users.  My sister doesn't agree with the
> sentiment, but I guess I'm looking for opinions other than hers!


> Thanks so much in advance.  It may seem trivial to you, but this is
> really something I'm struggling with so I really appreciate any time
> people take to respond.
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every saint has a past
every sinner has a future

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