[NAGDU] [nagdu] Preferential Treatment was: Blanket Prosciption Against Advance Notice

Fri Dec 2 22:51:18 UTC 2016

Buddy, thank you for putting this so elegantly. What I like to tell people is that sometimes I do not wish to be on the clock. What I mean by this, is that I am willing to educate people when they ask or say stupid or ignorant things about blindness because of negative perceptions they may have for their own reasons. However, sometimes I am plain tired, having a bad day, or just not in the mood to deal with those kinds of attitudes. The end result is I might react, wait for it, here it comes, just like a sighted person who is asked a stupid question. The other day, Stacie and I were waiting for the bus. This lady kept asking her questions about the dog. After about the third or fourth question, she asks if the dog was hers. To me it would've seemed like it would've made sense to ask that question from the very beginning instead of can I pet your dog etc. Then, this lady, bless her heart, asks me if I am Stacie's caregiver. Had I been, so called, on the clock, I would've happily trying to educate her on how stupid the question was and try to educate her on the fact that blind people can lead normal lives, and we don't live in Holmes, and we can get out and have jobs etc. however it was a late Sunday afternoon, I had had a few beers, it was hot outside, and I just did not feel like educating her. So I asked her, what kind of question was that? I said to her, you don't say that to people. She still didn't get it. I admit that I kind of felt bad because I wondered if she might have a negative perception of blind people in thinking that all of us so called blind people are rude. However, I suspect that even had I try to educate her, she would not have gotten it anyway. All I am trying to say, is that I agree that sometimes when we assert ourselves it does not mean we are being rude. It just means that we are being human.

--
Raul A. Gallegos
RGA Tech Solutions
Assistive Technology Trainer

Mobile: 832.554.7285
Work: 832.639.4477
Personal Email: raul at raulgallegos.com
Work Email: training at raulgallegos.com

“Any teacher that can be replaced with a computer, deserves to be.” – David Thornburg

> On Dec 2, 2016, at 4:12 PM, Buddy Brannan via NAGDU <nagdu at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> Yes, but there's rude, and there's rude. What some consider to be rude might actually be rude, but on the other hand, some people think that just asserting oneself and saying "no" is rude. Don't believe this happens? Try telling someone they can't pet your dog. There seems to be this perception that we are always cheerful, and should always be pleasant and accept whatever anyone deigns to offer us, all with good grace of course. We aren't allowed to say no, turn down assistance, or lead private lives while not being someone's sideshow freak. Oh yeah, and we're supposed to like it. Tell me I'm wrong. As for me, I reject this notion entirely. I demand my humanity, with everything that that implies, including the very reasonable need to sometimes have a bad day. That doesn't mean I will just be rude and nasty as a matter of course, but neither does it mean I'm going to plast on a happy face and tell you my life story just because you think I should. 
> 
> As to preferential treatment, everything has a cost. Sometimes it's worth the cost, and other times it is not. TANSTAAFL, you know. 
> 
> Bottom line, and in general, you can have equal, or you can have special, but you can't have both. 
> 
> --
> Buddy Brannan, KB5ELV - Erie, PA
> Phone: 814-860-3194 
> Mobile: 814-431-0962
> Email: buddy at brannan.name
> 
> 
> 
> 
>> On Dec 2, 2016, at 4:01 PM, S L Johnson via NAGDU <nagdu at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>> 
>> Hello:
>> 
>> I am always very grateful when the airline moves me t a better seat.  That 
>> is much better than my dog being squished in a tight place and the passenger 
>> sitting next to me complaining about having to be near a dog.  I consider 
>> that a reasonable accommodation.  I feel the same about preboarding.  If 
>> they are willing to let me get myself and the dog settled before the other 
>> passengers begin pushing and shoving then I am all for it.  I do not think 
>> in any it is demeaning to us as blind people.  It is no different than them 
>> allowing extra time for someone using a walker or wheelchair.  Let's get 
>> real, it does take us a bit longer to get ourselves settled and avoiding the 
>> crowd is much better, especially when people these days are so impatient and 
>> likely to cause a fuss.  I think many blind people are much too sensitive to 
>> what some of you consider preferential treatment.  If you were a senior 
>> citizen who needed more time would you think it was wrong to let them have 
>> it?  no, you probably wouldn't.  I think we have to quit being so judgmental 
>> of others.  If you do not want what you consider as preferential treatment 
>> then politely decline it but don't knock anyone else for taking it.  Show 
>> appreciation for any airline or any other public transportation or 
>> accommodation for being kind enough to offer you a better place for you and 
>> your dog.  Changing the public attitude about blindness goes both ways.  We 
>> cannot insist on respect if we become rude whenever anyone tries to be nice 
>> to us.  One day many years ago I was in New York city.  I was at a very busy 
>> intersection waiting for the traffic light to change.  I did not know that 
>> signal was out of order until a person came up to me to offer assistance. 
>> That woman said she was very reluctant to offer assistance because many 
>> times she had been yelled at by blind people when she offered to help them. 
>> She said she found blind people to be very rude and hostile.  Obviously this 
>> is not the image we want to give the public.  Therefore, if you do not want 
>> assistance or to take advantage of other accommodations you don't think you 
>> deserve, then please decline with extreme politeness and consideration.
>> 
>> Sandra Johnson and Eva
>> -----Original Message----- 
>> From: David via NAGDU
>> Sent: Friday, December 02, 2016 3:24 PM
>> To: NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users
>> Cc: David
>> Subject: Re: [NAGDU] [nagdu] Preferential Treatment was: Blanket Prosciption 
>> Against Advance Notice
>> 
>> I think that comparison is a bit of stretch, Marion.
>> 
>> If the regular seats would fit ordinary humans, I might consider it
>> preferential treatment, but since they don't, I think it is a reasonable
>> accommodation.
>> 
>> I don't mind paying for adequate space, by the way, but I also don't
>> mind not being charged for it.
>> 
>> David and Claire Rose in Clearwater, FL
>> 
>>> On 12/2/2016 1:16 PM, Buddy Brannan via NAGDU wrote:
>>> This is a little like what we hear so many times about God giving us a 
>>> keener sense of hearing or touch to compensate for our blindness.
>> 
>> 
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