[Nfb-editors] Purpose of a NFB publication

[Mike Freeman]

Chris:

Great post!

I share your frustration!  I think there are several answers.  The most
pessimistic (while at the same time being the most realistic) is that we
cannot save the whole world; we should rejoice in those whom we *can*
influence to take the momentous step of daring to dream and daring to step
beyond their comfort level and to become independent.  Another answer is to
welcome them into a group with a friendly spirit that accepts them -- even
with their limitations -- and trust that they will eventually find something
or someone to inspire them to grow -- this is the "soft sell".  In this
connection, our kernel books are a written example of the phenomenon.  If
these folks want to become part of the group and the group norm is to be
independent, they'll naturally gravitate to this way of thinking even if
they don't believe it at first.  Dr. Jernigan always used to maintain that
we had to mouth NFB "truths" before we internalized them.

But perhaps part of the problem is the one I mentioned to Bridgit:  I'm not
sure the young people, let alone their parents and grandparents, truly
believe that we, the blind, can be independent and pull our own weight.
That and they don't buy into our view that blindness can be reduced to the
level of a damned nuisance, given training and opportunity (both large
provisos).  I think we just have to be patient, keep trying to spread the
word and revel in our successes.

Mike


-----Original Message-----
From: nfb-editors-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nfb-editors-bounces at nfbnet.org]
On Behalf Of Chris Kuell
Sent: Friday, April 08, 2011 7:55 AM
To: Correspondence Committee Mailing List
Subject: Re: [Nfb-editors] Purpose of a NFB publication

Gary,

I found your post very interesting, and it has prompted a cascade of 
thoughts for me. I have put quite a bit of time into trying to help blind 
people find jobs, because for me, thinking about the big picture, I believe 
the best way to change societies attitudes about blindness is for the 
sighted public to observe capable, competent blind people going about the 
activities of daily life. This means at work, at church, in the grocery 
store, as parents at school functions--that's how we can have an impact.

I've questioned many blind people who I think of as 'successful', and while 
their stories all differ, almost without exception they were raised by 
parents who had high expectations of them. Parents who were strong enough 
not to give into those feelings of 'oh my poor blind child...'. Parents who 
made their kids do chores, just like the other kids. Parents who let their 
kids take a fall now and then, who helped their kids learn to advocate for 
themselves. Parents who made their blind children get summer jobs in high 
school, just like their sighted siblings. Parents who taught their kids 
persistence.

I don't have to think very hard to come up with 10 blind people in my area 
who are unemployed, and as you say, spend their time primarily on the 
internet doing whatever they do. They have all looked for jobs, and of 
course, have been turned down. I'm quite certain none of them have been to 
25 interviews, never mind 100--they give up long before that. Several have 
told me that their families have always told them not to give up that SSDI 
check, that they always want to keep one hand on that security blanket. I 
try the logical argument that that blanket greatly limits their earning 
potential, but for some reason the fear is too great to overcome. Another 
common limiting factor is location. Of these people I'm thinking of, none 
would consider going for a job more than 20 miles from where they live, 
never mind considering applying for a job in another state. Again, having 
family nearby to hold their hand, to take them shopping or to the doctor is 
an easy comfort they don't seem willing to give up. Once a blind person has 
obtained employment, moved away from their family, they realize the 
challenges and liberation, and another move doesn't seem nearly as daunting.

But I'm not sure how to convince the unemployed  to take that initial leap 
from the nest.

The common thread is expectations. Those raised with high expectations, from

their families, from their teachers, and of themselves, are far likelier to 
succeed. In my chapter, three examples come immediately to mind.

About 9 years ago a grandmother used to bring her grandson, who was 14 at 
that time, to meetings--a great thing. One day I was chatting with her, and 
she told me Matt didn't like not being able to participate in gym. I said, 
"Why doesn't he participate in gym?" She detailed her and Matt's parents 
fears about him getting hurt, and then told me a story about a blind friend 
in Boston who was killed by a car while he was jogging one afternoon. I told

her I admired the blind guy who was jogging and I bet he was happy while he 
was doing it. I tried to talk to her about social acceptance, about the 
benefits of trying something you're not sure you can do and the confidence 
that comes with success,  and that even sighted kids get hurt sometimes in 
gym class, etc... but she wouldn't budge. They pushed Matt into studying 
piano, as many parents do, and he's an unemployed pianist today.

We have our chapter meetings every other month at the Olive Garden because 
they give us a private room, we have our business meeting first, then have a

nice lunch and socialize for a bit. Three years ago a recent high school 
graduate started coming to our meetings. I sat next to him and his mother to

get better acquainted. He ordered a chicken dish, then asked his mother to 
cut it up for him. Later on, I pulled him aside and told him diplomatically 
that he had to learn to be independent, starting to cut up his own food, or 
how did he ever expect to get a job? I told him everybody finds it tricky at

first, to try at home with toast and with practice he'd get the hang of it. 
The next time we met at the Olive Garden, he ordered the same thing, and 
asked the waitress to have the chef cut it up for him. These days he spends 
his time listening to podcasts and analyzing the sound effects on movies.

One final, most appalling example. When the guy mentioned above first 
started coming to chapter meetings, he brought his friend Brian,  and 
Brian's grandmother with him. Brian was quiet, but seemed like a nice kid. 
Like Matt, Brian was encouraged to play piano and had hopes of becoming a 
professional musician, although he had no set plan to do so. At one point he

asked his grandmother to bring him to the restroom. Now, our chapter 
treasurer for the last 30 years is a sighted lady named Annie. She is a 
saint who believes 100% in the capabilities of blind people. Annie observed 
the grandmother bringing Brian, who was 19 at that time--into the ladies' 
room! Annie had words with the grandmother when they came out of the 
restroom, and they never came to another meeting.

I could tell more horror stories, but these 3 anecdotes illustrate my point 
about expectations. Do you think any of these young men will ever be 
employed and independent?Would these three even read a newsletter, never 
mind being changed by it?

I suggested to Matt and his family, as well as to the guy who can't cut up 
his food, to obtain and listen to speeches of Dr.Jernigan. When I first went

blind, an NFBer named Mary Bernoli, who some of you might remember, 
suggested the same to me and they changed my life. I have also suggested 
they attend a national convention, and/or an NFB training center, which I 
think provides the best chance for them to ever achieve independence, but 
neither has taken my suggestion.

There are many variables which make up a capable, competent blind person. A 
teacher, a positive role model, a dream of something more can trigger the 
desire, the belief, the determination one has to have. Can we deliver it in 
a newsletter? Perhaps. Maybe a better way would be putting subliminal 
messages in a youtube video about a talking goat--I don't know.

Anyway, those are my rambling thoughts for today.

chris




 


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